Pixelation

Critique => Pixel Art => Topic started by: Helm on February 01, 2007, 10:01:41 pm

Title: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 01, 2007, 10:01:41 pm
(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude2.png)

I'll be taking critique as I go with this. I aim for 32 colors, lush rendering.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Joshua on February 01, 2007, 10:08:50 pm
I aim for 32 colors, lush rendering.

Thats something I'll be looking forward to. His left forearm seems a little low right now, by the way.

Looking forward to seeing this progress!
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 01, 2007, 10:25:49 pm
color blocking

(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude3.png) (http://www.locustleaves.com/dude4.png) - 32 colors in there, ready to start rendering

arm fixed?
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Souly on February 01, 2007, 10:56:31 pm
Perhaps there should be just enough sword out of the sheath that it has that shiney flicker on it. :D
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 01, 2007, 11:02:58 pm
(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude5.png)

Good idea.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Sherman Gill on February 01, 2007, 11:24:42 pm
Not the poodle!
So far I can't tell if he's wearing a really weird shirt, or if his head is just really red. Also, Shouldn't the sheath be attached to something?
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 01, 2007, 11:32:06 pm
(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude6.png)

Nah, he just picked up the katana and went for it.

This piece is now called 'KITTY EMPIRE' since the Big Black song came into winamp and seemed strangely appropriate.

His face is real red. He's angry. Does it read better now?
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Ryumaru on February 01, 2007, 11:43:15 pm
whatever is going on with his pecks isnt reading well to me.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 01, 2007, 11:52:30 pm
(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude7.png)

Could you elaborate on that, Ryu?

That's it for tonight.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Feron on February 01, 2007, 11:52:57 pm
he's wearing an incomplete tank-top.  thats why its not reading that well atm i guess.

looks good.  i will enjoy watching this thread unravel.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Akira on February 01, 2007, 11:55:21 pm
hrm. i don't know how useful crits are at this stage because you tend to tweak alot after the first render correct?

anywho i feel like his hair and the banner shaft are AA'd too much and they sorta just blur into the background. for me his pecks read fine.
maybe try some selout? :crazy:
sorry, that was uncalled for.
his face could be redder.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: khorin on February 01, 2007, 11:56:17 pm
Yeah, are those black dots his nipples? If so, they seem to be too far out. *shrug

I must say, excellent job on the fore-shortening but that leg seems larger compared to the left...that may just be me.

Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 12:05:03 am
It's not a tank-top, it's bandages around his chest to hold the banner up. The other end goes... into his pants.

Quote
anywho i feel like his hair and the banner shaft are AA'd too much and they sorta just blur into the background. for me his pecks read fine.

I'll keep this in mind when I do the last checks. I don't want too sharpy corners everywhere here, but yeah it might be too much.

EDIT:

CAN'T STOP

(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude8.png)
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: The B.O.B. on February 02, 2007, 12:20:04 am
   Not a fan of the character design at the moment, though I'm pretty sure the generic-cat lover-everyday-joe was the angle you were going for. It took me a while to figure out those were bandages. They just don't read so well with me, for some reason. Obviously this isn't supposed to be an exact replica of the human form, so I'll leave at style recognition.

p.s....I hate cats. I hope the dog rips his nuts off...toodles!
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: pkmays on February 02, 2007, 12:48:32 am
(http://img77.imageshack.us/img77/9834/dude8vr3.png)

Pose seems kinda awkward. Tried to clarify that he's about to unleash on the mutt. Also grounded the foot for dramatic effect.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 12:58:49 am
That is a very helpful crit, if only it was earlier in the thread. Still, I'll actually do the large stance edits simply because your version is so much better.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Rydin on February 02, 2007, 01:17:23 am
The first thing that stuck out to me was the kitty banner...seeing the lines for it, I thought "man, that's going to look wicked", but then you went off and chose red and white for the colors...I suppose it's personal preference, and I would guess it's more accurate era/location (I'm assuming you're going for an oriental warrior look)...but I personally would try to give it a communist propaganda color theme, but again: personal preference.
Still on the banner, another thing that is slightly bothersome is the perspective of it;  it seems to face the viewer when it should be facing more in the direction of the warrior's head...though this may be me seeing wrong.
Just for the record, I'm not a big fan of the shadow the warrior is casting, though it may come together later--maybe something more dynamic than a blob.  I would also say that the guy's hair could use some work, too, though I think that's been established by others.
What I'm really digging is the composition...already, in such an unfinished state, there is an amazing sense of movement and tenseness, like a looming orchestra almost.
This should prove to be very interesting to see finished. Keep on pixelling!
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Blick on February 02, 2007, 01:19:38 am
Each time I look at the sign with the kitten, I feel like it should be tilted a bit more to the side to face away from the viewer slightly more.

The highlight on the thigh seems too strong. I know my jeans don't shine like that.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 01:21:06 am
(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude9.png)

back on track. Thanks lots, pkmays. I should know better than to go with the first sketch on action poses.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Feron on February 02, 2007, 01:23:57 am
considering your going to redo the bandages i suggest an 'X' type formation.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 02:01:07 am
No X.

(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude10.png)

I CAN'T STOP
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: The B.O.B. on February 02, 2007, 02:03:55 am
No X.

(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude10.png)

I CAN'T STOP

   The pose is lookin' much better now. However, now his head looks out of place with the body. Maybe try tilting the head a little further down, to where his chin is coming closer to his chest, to fit the body. Also, I noticed that every time I looked at the banner, it resembles a Panda more than it does a cat or kitten. Might be the black eyes ,or just not enough room for the pointed ears to show the difference. Overall, though, the main thing that concerns me is how the characters are going to fit in with the perspective-specific background. For some reason, I feel as though you are going to run into a conflict of the two, when both are too detailed to change. I don't quite know how to fix it yet, but if I figure it out, I'll try and edit it a smidge to be more specific. However, I could be wrong, and it may come out a whole lot different than I'm expecting.
   Details looking great so far though. Can't wait to see this updated...
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Ryumaru on February 02, 2007, 02:10:00 am
im looking forward to seeing this progress. youre rendering style is definitely similair to that one big piece of yours. i find it impressive that your rendering isnt hindered because of you usually doing lower color work.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 02:33:32 am
(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude11.png)

Okay, NOW I call it a night.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: pkmays on February 02, 2007, 02:41:28 am
(http://img482.imageshack.us/img482/2143/dudepersp3ay3.png)

I share concern over the perspective. I'm seeing a ton of different vectors. Right now it's not a problem because the background is just connected by big disjointed blocks of color. Not sure how you're going to go about rendering it, but you could run into some issues if you start adding details, especially where the ground plane meets the city scape.

(http://img174.imageshack.us/img174/3167/dudeperspvk0.png)

Attempt to unifiy the perspective.

(http://img247.imageshack.us/img247/7209/dudepersp2jj6.png)

Quick cleanup.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 02:48:32 am
(http://www.locustleaves.com/persp.png)

The only perspective we're interested in this one is this simple two-point. The rest (background geometry and so on) is just design, it will not be realistically rendered and serves as background instead of generic limbospace. It is not an actual three-dimensional setting for the character.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: pkmays on February 02, 2007, 02:57:15 am
So not even the ground itself will be on the same plane as the character which stands on it?
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Derek on February 02, 2007, 03:01:49 am
Very nice!  Hands look a bit small to me, but then again, I tend to make them larger than what's correct.  The new pose is better, but I feel like the upper body could be exaggerated a little more, even.

That leg is real real nice! :crazy:
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 03:04:09 am
The (theoretical) ground is level enough. The green vector doesn't necessarily mean realistic ground tilt. It's important to consider what the image is trying to achieve, and that is not streamlined ZZZZZOOOOOM SAMURAI SLASH DEFEATS EVIL (which your unified perspective edit achieves wonderfully). What's going on is deranged doggie slasher. Key themes are instability, confusion and insanity, therefore.

The shape construction behind the characters is closer to a mondrian painting than an actual cityscape. I can, and have drawn a number of strict perspective shots of such, I'm not trying to hide a disability here. I use the elements to create a composition with interest more than to give him a believable gameworld. The top right space has a good opening of text and whatnot. Squint eyes and count the primary and secondary places of interest. This is out-of-balace-looking but it's not imbalanced.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: pkmays on February 02, 2007, 03:16:12 am
Well I guess the edit I made with the multiple vectors proves your point. You might consider going even more hog wild, as my eyes still want confuse it with amateurish draftmanship rather than intentional chaotic disorder.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 03:18:26 am
There will be more devolving into scribbliness to signify that. I can't think of another way that won't make it too busy.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: The B.O.B. on February 02, 2007, 04:39:03 am
I still agree with pkmays. I mean, with the shadow underneath his body, it still makes it look as if he is on a separate plane, DESPITE the fact that you mentioned the background is not supposed to be in conjunction with the characters themselves. If the shadow is to be used, then wouldn't it be more skewed to fit the strange inclination of the background? I would try removing it to see if there is a difference in the strange perspective it might be creating. Just a general opinion, though.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 12:34:04 pm
(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude12.png)

Getting there.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Mirre on February 02, 2007, 12:48:38 pm
This si looking really cool. I like the idea for this one, hehe. I've nothing much to c&c here, seems everyone else got to it before me. I do agree about the background... it looks a bit as if the ground is rounded and slanting upwards. Hard to explain.

I think the anathomy after the last edit looks just great. I also really like the texture and detail on the pants. Maybe the dog's head is a bit small?
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: cb43569 on February 02, 2007, 01:22:56 pm
Brilliant work. One complaint, though. In the latest update, the guy's left arm looks a bit detached from the rest of his body, if you get what I mean :-\.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 01:29:58 pm
(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude13.png)

Mostly finalized for now.

I ain't changing the background.

The crit about the arm seems correct, I will adress it soon.

Thank you everybody for all your help!
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: eqko on February 02, 2007, 01:45:22 pm
this is a good style, I definitely like the difference between the main focus/character and the background.

while you're fixing the arm, you might want to look into the pose of his left arm as well. in a more natural /correct pose
we would be looking head-on on his elbow, meaning it would be raised much more.

try the pose he's got it in now, you need to twist your arm to an extreme you would never when grabbing a hilt to take it out
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 01:53:16 pm
I actually took the pose and snapped a picture (no, I'm not sharing) and the arm position seems comfortable enough.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Souly on February 02, 2007, 02:10:26 pm
(no, I'm not sharing)
Pleaseee?  :D
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 02:24:00 pm
no. man. Who wants to see me pretend-swordwield an old pool cue in my underwear.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Opacus on February 02, 2007, 02:50:36 pm
no. man. Who wants to see me pretend-swordwield an old pool cue in my underwear.
Souly :D
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Souly on February 02, 2007, 02:56:26 pm
no. man. Who wants to see me pretend-swordwield an old pool cue in my underwear.
Souly :D
Obviously.

Anyways, enough idle chit chat and more pixeling.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Opacus on February 02, 2007, 04:05:25 pm
And a comment by the way, his left (our view) knee looks like there's some sticking out square. Like a piece of metal or something.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Evil-Ville on February 02, 2007, 05:04:04 pm
This is awesome, the background reminds me of those old 3d vector racing games.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: big brother on February 02, 2007, 06:11:25 pm
It's interesting to see a piece made step by step on the forums.

Some quick crits to contribute:

The angle of the sword is a bit hard to read. The way the hilt's rendered makes me think the sheath is held parallel to the left leg. However, the angle of the hands makes me think that he's holding the sheath in a way that it falls behind him. Grrr...too hard to explain, so I did a super quick sketch.

(http://www.herculeaneffort.com/upload/bbedittemp.png)

I did the one on the left to show the tilt on the sword (I think it gives it more depth), but it breaks the flow of line you have from the right shoulder to the elbow. The right sketch tries to justify a tilt on the sword without pushing the right arm out.

The angle on the chest bothers me a bit. It seems like his whole torso would be turned to the side a little (it's fairly frontal as is). With the position of the rightmost arm, the pec on that side would be pushed to the left while the leftmost pec would be pulled tight across the chest because the left shoulder is behind him. Also, the 3 evenly placed striations on the pecs seem a bit odd.

You've done enough fiddly pixel-work that it seems too late to make any major changes, so maybe these crits are irrelevant.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 06:27:05 pm
Quote
It's interesting to see a piece made step by step on the forums.

It was a conscious experiment because as of late I don't ask for critique mid-progress, I just post semi-finished stuff and people give me nitpicks. I felt that I am not above critique pixel-wise so I thought the best way to be helped by this place would be to not post semi-done stuff, but ask for help from the go. This led to the very very useful - though tiring - pose change pkmays suggested, as well as to a host of more minor but good crits. This place still works for me and I should ask for critique more.

I intend to pull the left (ours) arm down at the shoulder, naturally lowering that peck as well a few pixels. I will change the even segmentations of it while I'm at it.

Also a ten-four on the katana sheath. Will be reworked soon enough.

Thanks for the critique.

EDIT:

(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude14.png)

most changes made. Is the sheath good this time, so I can start AAing it?
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: pkmays on February 02, 2007, 07:43:42 pm
Palm and thumb are unreadable left hand. Highlight and shadow on right hand pointer finger are HARSH.

right nipple too low, too far to the left.

Shoes are bland, compaired to jeans/skin. Specs are coming from left, all other specs are from top.

Post too blurry.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Willows on February 02, 2007, 10:44:29 pm
Hahahahahaha, I love his facial expression... even if he is a cat-loving dog-murderer.

Having said that, I do have some thoughts. Here, sitting at my computer, I can jab my elbow into my hip, and place my arm along my thigh to see how far along it extends. For me, my fingertips extend a little beyond my knee. For the cat-killer, it looks as if even his fingers wouldn't reach his kneecap. I'm not sure if that's because his forearm is too short or his thigh too long, but in either case something is wrong.

The only time I'd be able to stay upright in that position would be if I were springing up for a jump. That being said, I think it suits him, despite it seeming impossible.

Final note: I have no idea if it's supposed to line up, but if you were to draw a red line across the top of both shoulders, and one across the bottom of both pecs, you'd see that they don't line up at all. Just for kicks, put a nice blue line across both nipples and get a brand new line.

That's enough talking out my ass for one day, hopefully I said something valid.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 02, 2007, 11:44:48 pm
(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude15.png)

Tried to adress most points. I like the shoes though.

Willows, the things are overlong, but hopefully not to a jarring degree. Intentional.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Souly on February 03, 2007, 12:07:53 am
Looking good so far.

My only issue with it is how gray the sword is now.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Mirre on February 03, 2007, 12:14:47 am
For some reason I really love the way you did the legs, shoes and upper body. But especially the legs. Hot.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Monkeyspork on February 03, 2007, 02:17:21 am
I never post on the forums but i have to now, this work is awesome Helm, wow...

Only thing bugging me is the eyes, they seem to stand out way to much, although they do have a cool phycotic feeling, however thats spelt :P

-edit-

What i mean by the eyes is that they are plain white, sorry didnt explain properly at first ^_^
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: MoD on February 03, 2007, 04:06:48 am
The ear seems to stick out a lot due to the high contrast with the black there. Maybe put in one of the greys in your palette to give it a smoother transition and make it draw less attention to itself. Hopefully I'm not just saying something that's due to the WIPness of the piece, but I thought to say something about it since the rest of the head is very detailed and cleaned up.

Very interesting concept, I was hoping for an actual kitty in a championesque role when I opened the topic, though.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 04, 2007, 05:24:03 pm
(http://www.locustleaves.com/dude16.png)

This done?
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Ensellitis on February 04, 2007, 06:15:50 pm
the only thing that bugs me is his mouth...  the black seems to stick out a bit too much to me...  but that may just be me. 

excellent work, helm
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 04, 2007, 06:19:52 pm
This has been submitted to pixel joint, and i'm calling it done for now.

Thank you everybody, for the help. I really appreciate it.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Lawrence on February 04, 2007, 06:43:02 pm
This is a splendid scene, and I know you've finished, but I just wondered whether the dotted fashion in which you antialiased the top and bottom red parts of the sign's edge was deliberate or not, because, in the palette, there are many colours within that range which do it smoother.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Opacus on February 04, 2007, 06:45:25 pm
I must congratulate you with the end result Helm, instantly added to favourites at Pixel Joint. I enjoyed the progress of this.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 04, 2007, 06:47:59 pm
This is a splendid scene, and I know you've finished, but I just wondered whether the dotted fashion in which you antialiased the top and bottom red parts of the sign's edge was deliberate or not, because, in the palette, there are many colours within that range which do it smoother.

It's deliberate. I don't see which other palette entries do it smoother. Edit perhaps?
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Lawrence on February 04, 2007, 08:01:04 pm
(http://imagehost.ensellitis.com/imagesv2/4381184471dude16.gif)

On the top-outside, I've kept the lightest aa colour dotted, since it's rather dark compared to the background.

Edit: Oops, I seem to have left an AA UFO in there :)
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Godslayer on February 04, 2007, 08:27:51 pm
Since the banner is strapped to his back, wouldn't it share the same perspective as his torso? As in, sideways coming towards us, above his head?
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Malor on February 04, 2007, 08:37:35 pm
I love this peice, but the pants look less like jeans (which I think is what you were going for, If I am mistaken, disregard this crit) and more like leather. The cyan highlight seems to make it more shiney, and leather like. I think if you were to get rid of this highlight, it woulld look more like jeans. agian, if this is how you intended the pants to look, apologies.
Title: Re: Kitten Champion [WIP]
Post by: Helm on February 04, 2007, 08:39:25 pm
Matter of preference I guess, Lawrence. That shade is one shade too dark to aa with in my opinion. Superbright red has curious qualities. It might seem darker in HSL than the shade you used to aa it with, therefore correct, but it actually reads much brighter than almost all the shades in the picture, hence my dither-aa-solution to the issue. But thanks for the effort.