Critique => Pixel Art => Topic started by: lief on September 02, 2005, 12:50:28 am

Title: new horizons WIP
Post by: lief on September 02, 2005, 12:50:28 am
wanted to save it until completely finished but im very proud of it so far and just wanted to show my friends at pixelation.  WIP, c&c and suggestions welcome.
27 colors, will come down to around 20 - 22 I hope. no reference.  stages saved, will do animation when finished.

Title: Re: new horizons WIP
Post by: Godslayer on September 02, 2005, 01:48:14 am
Good lord. At first my computer didn't show it, and then it only showed a little bit, so I wrote up a message about how I couldn't figure out what it was, I'm glad I took a second look before posting.

Anyways, I really dig the waves and sky. The clouds seem a bit unnatural in the curve, but I'm thinking thats just the style of the piece, right?
My only real critique is that the canvas on the sails looks a tad too...random. Maybe mildly overdithered? It just seems to busy and folded, in a time when I assume is stormy. The wind of a storm would probably force it to billow out and stretch. On the whole storm note, I think darkening the clouds might help, because it doesn't look very menacing right now, and it and the waves don't match.

I pretty much am basing the storm aspect on the rough seas. If its not a storm, then your a little screwed I guess, because no one in there right minds would want to ruin waves of that magnitude by making them smoother.

I apologize that my crits and suggestions where short, but I just cant comprehend what would go into making this kind of work better (as much as others may)
Title: Re: new horizons WIP
Post by: lief on September 02, 2005, 04:38:52 am
Thank you for the suggestions and crits, Godslayer. 


you had valid points on all areas, right side of sky is temporary, as was palette (even this is, I want to go back and add reflections on water), the sails will actually have ropes down the front from the rigging which make them look more strained.   That is actually the look I was going for, strained... not folded as they have turned out.  I think I need to narrow up the folding.

I like this one better already. :)
Title: Re: new horizons WIP
Post by: Helm on September 02, 2005, 07:46:03 am
First of all, congratulations, because this is very pretty. I'll get into heavy c&c when I get home, but I can tell you right now that the volumetrics of the sails aren't right. They look crumpled, not strained. I'd make the highlights more even and sadly less detailed possibly. I dig the water very much. Maybe the sky detail needs to be decontrasted a little to a lot because it looks like a second set of upside down water at first. I know it's a storm brewing, but hey, give some decontrasting a try. There's tons of places you could aa like a sprite art nerd, but I guess you'll come down to that after everything else is strictly done. The water foam is a nice touch. I really love looking at this, even notice the lazur influence :P oh where the sky follows the right contour of the sails, it shouldn't. fake it going on behind the sails more.

There's a few more things, when I get back. Again, great, great job, and such a refreshing thing to see such artwork besides all game art in pixelation from time to time. <3
Title: Re: new horizons WIP
Post by: Peppermint Pig on September 02, 2005, 08:14:16 am
Cool piece.. I think the clouds and ship details could be improved, but great water work.. I toyed around with the colors too... had some ideas about inverting the luminosity for the cloudscape...

Title: Re: new horizons WIP
Post by: AlexHW on September 04, 2005, 12:01:57 am
Nice work,
I think the clouds are the biggest issue, and then the sails/cloth stuff next..
The clouds are too consistant looking, and it makes the sky look like a fluffy blanket.
Here's a reference i found online: http://www.wga.hu/art/p/peetersb/storm1.jpg
He uses different shaped clouds which seem to take up space at different depths (some overlay others).
As for the sails, they seem too wrinkled like a loose piece of cloth. Try making them look smoother and bulbous(?) like they are catching wind maybe..
The water looks really nice, but could use more variable heights if it is a stormy situation. The rather even water level makes it seem quite calm even though there are many waves.
Title: Re: new horizons WIP
Post by: Negative Gravity on September 04, 2005, 04:05:23 am
Holy shit! [dies]
[Dies two more times at seeing the two edits]

Whew. Dude. That was awesome... Is awesome. I'm lost in my own thoughts of confusion. I just can't wait to see the progress for this. Oh man. Whew.
Title: Re: new horizons WIP
Post by: Sawtooth on September 04, 2005, 04:24:05 am
This is looking pretty good.  Really good.  I like the first color edit (with all of the oppressive greens) the best.  The colors and shading (especially on the sea) are fantastic.


The clouds look like they are being pushed up by the mast.  I think if you did the background separately from the ship, it could help eliminate the "fluffy blanket" look.

To make the sails look more strained, try making sure that there are no wrinkles on the sails where the air is hitting the hardest(a large horizontal band in the middle of the sails), and putting wrinkles only near where the rigging and whatnot is pulling on it (I'd imagine the sail is attached to that horizontal bar through a series of hooks and hoops, maybe).

Otherwise, wow.  Looking really good, there.  You have some excellent shading there.
Title: Re: new horizons WIP
Post by: lief on September 04, 2005, 11:16:07 pm
i am humbled by the artists who chose to crit my work, thank you.  i have taken all suggestions and comments aboard (sic) for my next update.  thanks for the comments and edit pep, its an interesting twist.  helm, this piece was actually started because of something you said to me.  alex, thank you for posting here, its an honor.  ng: dont die and dont get confused, just draw something.  sawtooth, thank you.
stormy sea: it was not originally planned to be stormy as such, more just to show the untamedness (hehe) of the sea.  it does need varying heights however, also some final touching up.
clouds: right is edited mirror of left.  I cheated so I had a full sky to show when I posted this.  I think I will remove entire sky and start again.  Like I said on previous point, it was not even planned to be stormy, more of a stylised ship in a stylised ocean under some stylised clouds.
ship: more details as pep mentioned, it also looks a bit twisted but i think it fits with the style of the piece.  It is not meant to be a photo.
sails: as this seems to be the major issue at the moment i will work on it first, I can get the other stuff later.
details: gulls, land, people in ship
Title: Re: new horizons WIP
Post by: lief on September 05, 2005, 03:40:42 am

do they look more strained? (very unfinished, but you can see where it is going)
palette tweaks & decontrasted sky (and pulled 3 colors out of palette i think...)
Title: Re: new horizons WIP
Post by: AlexHW on September 05, 2005, 04:46:22 am
do they look more strained? (very unfinished, but you can see where it is going)

Yeah, I like how it is developing..
Also to note, the left edges of the 2 middle sails (the backwards C shape creating the left edge of the sails) are showing their thickness to the viewer, and by shadeing the edge like you have it, it gives the impression that those edges are smooth and receding towards the background. You might want to consider experimenting with a crisper edge here to express the thinness of it (to not create a shaded transition between these 2 specific edges and the interior of the sails is basically what I mean).