Pixelation
Critique => Pixel Art => Topic started by: Siskan on September 14, 2013, 04:11:15 pm
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Hello!
I'm working on a series of pixel art with the same resolution and color count (24). I've finished two of them so far, but I'd be happy to improve these based on your critique!
I'm currently working on the third piece and I'll upload it once I made a bit more progress on it.
(http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p248/EmblemDefender/sword11.png) (http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p248/EmblemDefender/play8.png)
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Ah, I've seen the right one on PJ :) I'll stick to feedback on just that, as I'm not usually very good with crits. First things I noticed were the highlights on the wooden part of the window frame. They contrast a lot with the base part of the wood, so you should tone them down. Another thing with the window: it looks like it has no glass at all! I'd try increasing the brightness of the outside stuff slightly, or add some reflections from the lights of the room. Last thing: the whole atmosphere is rather cold, due to the pure or blue-ish grays. Maybe you can bring in some color. Maybe give the woody stuff around the window some new paint.
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Ah, I've seen the right one on PJ :) I'll stick to feedback on just that, as I'm not usually very good with crits. First things I noticed were the highlights on the wooden part of the window frame. They contrast a lot with the base part of the wood, so you should tone them down. Another thing with the window: it looks like it has no glass at all! I'd try increasing the brightness of the outside stuff slightly, or add some reflections from the lights of the room. Last thing: the whole atmosphere is rather cold, due to the pure or blue-ish grays. Maybe you can bring in some color. Maybe give the woody stuff around the window some new paint.
Thanks a lot for the critique!
There are two reasons why I'm using those highlights on the window frame. One being that she's supposed to sit close to a TV which works as a light source and the other being that it looks rather flat without it. Here (http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p248/EmblemDefender/play5.png) is an older version. Do you think it looks better?
Right, reflections. I should have done some of that, thanks. Those diagonal things are supposed to be imperfections in the glass (or rain?)
The atmosphere is supposed to be cold though. As the title may suggest, it's hopefully going to be used in a game. And something bad is about to happen. : )
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A couple of stuff I noticed:
First illustration, the figure doesn't appear to be balanced. Either the sword is literally weightless or you inconveniently cropped the figure so you can't feel the illusion of weight. Perspective also comes off as odd; the buildings to me has put the horizon line right above her head but the figure comes off to be side-view instead of from-above.
Second illustration, I think there could be an approach to wood texture that doesn't depend on pixel dots since that creates a dirty look that doesn't quite with with how cleanly pixelled everything else is. The dots also creates a lot of visual weight on the wood texture which is probably not what you want necessarily.
I'm personally spending quite a bit of time learning anatomy and drawing figures into perspective, so I'm learning as well. :lol:
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There are two reasons why I'm using those highlights on the window frame. One being that she's supposed to sit close to a TV which works as a light source and the other being that it looks rather flat without it. Here (http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p248/EmblemDefender/play5.png) is an older version. Do you think it looks better?
Ah, I was afraid my words could be mistaken :yell: I was talking about the other wood stuff next to the window. Here's a quick and dirty edit:
(http://i.imgur.com/zmj4VTr.png)
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A couple of stuff I noticed:
First illustration, the figure doesn't appear to be balanced. Either the sword is literally weightless or you inconveniently cropped the figure so you can't feel the illusion of weight. Perspective also comes off as odd; the buildings to me has put the horizon line right above her head but the figure comes off to be side-view instead of from-above.
Second illustration, I think there could be an approach to wood texture that doesn't depend on pixel dots since that creates a dirty look that doesn't quite with with how cleanly pixelled everything else is. The dots also creates a lot of visual weight on the wood texture which is probably not what you want necessarily.
I'm personally spending quite a bit of time learning anatomy and drawing figures into perspective, so I'm learning as well. :lol:
Sorry, I didn't get the balance part. Could you explain further?
Also she's standing on a balcony/terrace (see the railing).
I was thinking the way I went with the wood would add to the surrealistic stuff going on with the sky, but I might follow your advice and see if it turns out better. : ) Thanks for the critique.
Ah, I was afraid my words could be mistaken :yell: I was talking about the other wood stuff next to the window. Here's a quick and dirty edit:
Ah, could as well be me, English isn't my first language. Anyway, I suppose your edit makes sense. I think I'll go with something in between though. Thanks!
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I sketched the balance thing; drew the sword in closer to the body, properly gripped it with the lower hand, and broadened her stance by sticking out her right leg to put the (presumably) heavy sword nearer her centre of gravity. Try drawing a line down the centre of a figure and balancing the sides that way and also act out the pose yourself as well as consulting reference to get a feel for what would be natural/comfortable :y:.
(http://i.imgur.com/LnAv2Ap.png)
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I sketched the balance thing; drew the sword in closer to the body, properly gripped it with the lower hand, and broadened her stance by sticking out her right leg to put the (presumably) heavy sword nearer her centre of gravity. Try drawing a line down the centre of a figure and balancing the sides that way and also act out the pose yourself as well as consulting reference to get a feel for what would be natural/comfortable :y:.
Ah I see now, thanks. I'm well aware that you can't hold heavy stuff too far from your center of gravity for too long, however, as a matter of fact I did pose with an actual sword (19th century saber to be exact, which is longer and heavier than this sword would be). It wasn't hard at all.
Also this new pose doesn't look half as daring/threatening/offensive as the old one.
I'm curious about your other edits by the way. I suppose the wall behind her is just a quick reparation after moving things around? But what about the ornament on the top of the tower?
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as a matter of fact I did pose with an actual sword (19th century saber to be exact, which is longer and heavier than this sword would be). It wasn't hard at all.
:lol: Ah well, I can only say that it looks awkward to me! The only way I can pantomime holding a sword completely vertically like that is closer in, arms bent; in order to have both forearms straight like that with the shoulders back, one arm would to be a fair bit longer than the other.
Possibly lack of threat is the expression? I got the feeling that it was more light-hearted, sorry. Maybe sword raised at an angle; as if to strike, or pointed at the viewer would work better. The sparkly bit up top I just found distracting; competing with the sword highlight as well as the moon; actually I reckon putting the moon behind the tip of the tower would be a nice solution.
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as a matter of fact I did pose with an actual sword (19th century saber to be exact, which is longer and heavier than this sword would be). It wasn't hard at all.
:lol: Ah well, I can only say that it looks awkward to me! The only way I can pantomime holding a sword completely vertically like that is closer in, arms bent; in order to have both forearms straight like that with the shoulders back, one arm would to be a fair bit longer than the other.
Possibly lack of threat is the expression? I got the feeling that it was more light-hearted, sorry. Maybe sword raised at an angle; as if to strike, or pointed at the viewer would work better. The sparkly bit up top I just found distracting; competing with the sword highlight as well as the moon; actually I reckon putting the moon behind the tip of the tower would be a nice solution.
Hmm. As far as I can remember this is pretty much the exact pose I pulled off. I'll have to double check tomorrow though (it's late and I'd wake people up, no mirrors in my room). I also imagine the sword to be (very) slightly tilted backwards (tip of the blade towards the background and the pommel towards the viewer).
Hah, no worries. I quite like that expression anyway. : D It does however not fit this situation very well. In any case, I really appreciate the critique and effort you put in helping out!
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I got the feeling that it was more light-hearted
I also thought this.
The expression of the image could be pushed to more threatening if that's what you're going for.
Here's some rough ideas.
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-vZwrxlqie3Q/UjVCDlx6znI/AAAAAAAAHqk/7hxwhNOKc5g/s1600/SwordGirl_6.png)
Also I didn't notice the controller in the second image the first few looks.
But yah cool, I like these.
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1st image, there are three points of interest, the hands, the sword tip, the face. The eye does not follow from one to the other very well.
There is a tangent point with the breast plate and the rear arm.
The stance is a bit weak. The arm hides the torso, the hair hides the face, the whole thing is wobbly. No line of action.
The belt could probably be lower. Belt at the hips instead of at the waist.
Edit:
(http://www.4freeimagehost.com/uploads/36fb054ca851.png)
Used a reference for the chin shape. The rest was me just moving things around. Also, I like faces, so I spent some time there. Pose is meant to be casual dangerous. Still needs lots of work, but you get the idea. Argh, the neck shadow needs to extend to the armor. Probably could look angrier too, but I wasn't sure of the mood you wanted.
See how the arm links to sword, which links back to the face. It keeps the eye moving around where you want it to go.
2nd image, neck anatomy is a bit weird. Lighting on the radiator implies a sharper angle than the person's shoulders. Controller needs more emphasis, face could use a stronger expression.
Overall these are rather nice.
Hope this helps,
Tourist
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The expression of the image could be pushed to more threatening if that's what you're going for.
Here's some rough ideas.
Your edit works best in my mind. I took after some of the stuff you did (don't mind the background for now, I've yet to get started).
(http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p248/EmblemDefender/sword12.png)
1st image, there are three points of interest, the hands, the sword tip, the face. The eye does not follow from one to the other very well.
There is a tangent point with the breast plate and the rear arm.
The stance is a bit weak. The arm hides the torso, the hair hides the face, the whole thing is wobbly. No line of action.
The belt could probably be lower. Belt at the hips instead of at the waist.
Used a reference for the chin shape. The rest was me just moving things around. Also, I like faces, so I spent some time there. Pose is meant to be casual dangerous. Still needs lots of work, but you get the idea. Argh, the neck shadow needs to extend to the armor. Probably could look angrier too, but I wasn't sure of the mood you wanted.
See how the arm links to sword, which links back to the face. It keeps the eye moving around where you want it to go.
Thanks for your critique.
I should probably have written a bit about this character. To make it short: A prince has been cursed and trapped as a church bell:
(http://fc02.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2013/136/1/4/prince_bell_in_pixels_by_emblemdefender-d65has8.png)
His sister, the princess, doesn't have much experience. But she's very determined to help her brother and she isn't afraid to do so either.
Your edit is rather nice, but with this in mind, she surely doesn't fit the description. She looks too mature and cocky.
Also about the belt, I'm going for a 90s look. Not just graphically but also fashion-wise.
I'll get back to you both about the second illustration later.
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Got started on a third one as well!
(http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p248/EmblemDefender/postman2.png)
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No worries. My edit does not look much like a princess.
New mustache man looks promising so far. All of your characters have an unhappy mouth. Intentional?
Tourist
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No worries. My edit does not look much like a princess.
New mustache man looks promising so far. All of your characters have an unhappy mouth. Intentional?
Tourist
Hah, well. In the princess's case I attempted to make this determined expression. I wouldn't really call it sad myself. The girl playing SNES on the other hand, I don't know. I wanted her to simply look concentrated at first, but she did end up looking sad instead. I'll probably try to alter it once I pick that piece up again! Thanks for reminding me. And I haven't decided on the postman's expression yet. In his case I want to have his personality show in his expression but I didn't quite figure out how yet. So I just settled with this for the time being.
Edit: Here's an update:
(http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p248/EmblemDefender/postman4.png)
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Its a good starting sketch but on larger images you should try offsetting your light source and maybe adding some subtle environmental back-lighting.
Then increase your contrast in response to the lighting.
Even draw the lighting arrow/s in so we can see what you're trying to do.
Lighting is so symmetrical now that it just makes it look flat and pillowy.
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How is this?
(http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p248/EmblemDefender/postman6.png)
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(http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p248/EmblemDefender/postman9.png)
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I'm not sure, actually about the extra rendering here (good practice though it may be :D); this guy is now quite a bit more rendered in the face (4 shades of skin versus 2, full modelling) & less stylised (full nose/mouth, regular eyes) than the previous two, I'd consider knocking that back a bit for consistency across the set.
The carriage there feels pretty cramped between his head and the frame; interacting with the foreground by abutting stuff rather than being overlapped, and it's contrast (nearly as much as the guy) is also pulling it to the front a bit. Again, the other two had nice simple colour separation fg/bg.
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I'm planning to widen all three pictures a bit. Changing the pose on the first picture created a composition issue and I don't want to center her entirely, nor do I want to flip things.
And as you say, the carriage is cramped on this piece.
I don't personally find the realism to be a problem. I think that's what it's usually like when it comes to old people in these Japanese styles. I could make the eyes bigger like they initially were if that really makes things better. You got a good point about the background, I'll try to adjust the contrast and make it more monotone overall. I haven't added any highlights yet either.
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Mostly going off of Facet's comments
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Z1O-aa5WAYE/Ujdkjyu-tkI/AAAAAAAAHsY/oJgbnxbRG_k/s1600/trumpetCop_4.png)
It's definitely worth trying out a few variations of the guys face.
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Sure, I'll play around a bit. Like the others, these are characters with backgrounds and personalities which is what I based the current looks on. The one to the right looks most interesting in that regard.
Also a few words on how they are going to be used. They aren't meant to be displayed next to each other or anything like that, so it isn't that important that they share all of these features. The characters are already pictured in different sizes and so on anyway. They aren't even in the same "dimension" as a matter of fact, well you probably guessed so already.
Also, the carriage lacks horses, which is a message I want to deliver in this piece (I know his head was covering that part, but as I said I was planning to widen these later on and then move it to the left).
Edit: I liked that mustache so I made a very similar one. I'll see if I can tweak his face some, but I tried tons of looks when I got started, and ended up with this (though he changed further along the way). So this already seems to be what I want. But I will experiment some more and see what happens.
(http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p248/EmblemDefender/postman11-1.png)
Edit 2: Some work with the background. I messed up the perspective by turning the sky into a lake. I'll fix that.
(http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p248/EmblemDefender/postman12.png)
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They aren't meant to be displayed next to each other or anything like that, so it isn't that important that they share all of these features. The characters are already pictured in different sizes and so on anyway. They aren't even in the same "dimension" as a matter of fact, well you probably guessed so already.
Surely you're aiming for a consistent aesthetic though? I did think maybe you were differentiating two different worlds but horse cab guy seemed consistent with sword girl's period fantasy thing? I was going to have crack at this card but gave up 'cos my attempts at old anime faces looked ridiculous :P.
I had a go at the things I mentioned of the previous instead (maybe you're sick of that one now though! :-X), namely those mismatched arms; I shortened the near and made more room for the far by pulling it out and back. The new foreshortened sword looked more like a taper from the hilt to me; it would have been pretty huge and the character itself is in much shallower space.
(http://i.imgur.com/0qvmWn9.gif)(http://i.imgur.com/CYmofvM.png)
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I needed a break from all of them actually! : D But I'm going to work on them all again, so I appreciate that you took your time. It all makes sense too, so I'll go ahead and make the necessary adjustments.
I've also been working on the postman today. I decided to let the carriage play its part in a separate animation I'll do later, so there will be more focus on the character on this piece now (as someone proposed before).
(http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p248/EmblemDefender/postman14.png)
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You need to lower the horizon line, otherwise the person is in a different perspective then the background.