Pixelation

Critique => Pixel Art => Topic started by: ErekT on June 08, 2010, 08:45:27 pm

Title: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: ErekT on June 08, 2010, 08:45:27 pm

Hello!
 
A spooky ghost lady standing around in a forest trying to pawn her ghost infant off on passers-by. Not quite finished yet but it's getting there. I've kind of stared myself blind on it though so criticisms appreciated, especially on the dress/kimono anim.

(http://i834.photobucket.com/albums/zz263/ErekT_Pixel/Ubume.gif)
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: Argyle on June 08, 2010, 08:59:28 pm
The animation is very smooth and nice!  I would make the hair have a little movement on her right (our left) especially where there is a visible strand clump separated from the mass of the rest of her hair. You might take note that there are some stray brown pixels in frame 2 on the hair, and on frame one there are single pixel strobes going on in her right cheek as well as right above her left hand. Hard to critique the aforementioned illegitimate ghost baby that will be in her arms, as it is yet unrenedered and I have no idea what you'll be doing on it..
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: gennoveus on June 09, 2010, 01:05:54 am
criticisms appreciated, especially on the dress/kimono anim.

The animation looks very nice. The hair is really impressive!

It that a kimono or a yukata? Either way, it is missing the obi (thick belt), the collar doesn't stand up enough, and it's too long. (should end above the ankles)

Also, both yukata and kimono are not connected all the way around, there should be a split down the length of the body (not so much a split as overlapping cloth) 

http://www.google.co.jp/images?hl=ja&q=%E6%B5%B4%E8%A1%A3&lr=&um=1&ie=UTF-8&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi

If it's not supposed to be a yukata/kimono, ignore everything i just said! ;D Probably not a good idea to make it a yukata/kimono because they are stiffer than that and wouldn't blow around impressively.

You could base it on some Chinese clothing that can be made of a more material.
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: zez on June 09, 2010, 02:30:24 am
Thats really pretty, I like where you are going with it. The right arm (my right, her left) seems to be moving from a totally different wind source from the rest tho, and is generally a great deal less smooth. The sleeve is kind of doing this 1-2-rest-rest thing on a shuffle... erm, pardon the music vernacular, it moves twice, rather jarringly, in rapid succession then hangs for a second and does it again, well the rest is blowing super smooth. That totally would happen if there was a sudden gust of wind, but that isnt how the wind is moving in the rest of the piece.
There are also a few pixels popping in and out of existence that are a bit jarring, there's one around the right shoulder (just under,) and two on her right leg, just below the hips, that also happen to be a much lighter white then really makes sense.
Anyhow, keep it up, this is gorgeous.
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: CrazyMLC on June 09, 2010, 02:38:09 am
It looks really nice! The kimono/dress flaps wonderfully!

One effect you could add where the kimono is too tight to flap is to make little wrinkles flow across the dress.
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: ErekT on June 09, 2010, 05:53:52 pm
Thanks for sum good feedback! :y: I have taken the crits onboard and tried to fix most of the stuff pointed out. Except the sleeve, I'll save that for later.

(http://i834.photobucket.com/albums/zz263/ErekT_Pixel/Ubume-1.gif)

It that a kimono or a yukata?

Actually neither. The whole idea with the ghost woman standing roadside with her newborn comes from Japanese folklore but I'm really trying to create a setting that's not too culture-specific.
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: linx on June 09, 2010, 07:11:08 pm
It may just be me, but right now it seems like the sleeve of what she's wearing is beating like a heart instead of flapping in the wind.
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: dpixel on June 09, 2010, 08:53:15 pm
Just an idea that may enhance the windy feel:  Maybe show a hint of a foot in a frame or 2.
And I agree with linx about the sleeve beating like a heart.  Although, it might just be the upper part of the sleeve.  Maybe if just some of the lighter pixels were moved around in that part rather than the darker (shading) pixels.  Love this though!  :y:
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: Conzeit on June 11, 2010, 02:48:53 pm
the baby right now cant really be distinguished from the girl, since you have only used light shades and outlines to distinguish him from her, he doesnt really look like he has any volume, he could just be a wrinkly scarf she holds over her shoulder. The kind of volume we're looking for here is what you have on the arm below the kid, you can clearly tell that it has a cylindrical shape (maybe a bit too much for a sleeve) you should use that kind of contrast on the baby, or even more. Look at the picture right now, if you squint you'll see that all of the contrast puts emphasis on is the girl's hips and skirt...that'd be great if she was a seductress succubus ghost but she's not, the point here is that she's got a dead baby so you should try to have the shading on him be as attractive as that of the hips.

Also...the girl has a completely stable pose, and her face has a blank expression...I believe if she has gone trough death and is so confused that she's still trying to sell her dead baby he should probably look a little less composed, be hunching over or at least look depressed
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: ErekT on June 11, 2010, 04:24:11 pm

True that  :) I've changed the shading to make it look more like there could be a baby inside that bundle. About the expression, wellll.. I don't know  :-\ I tend to picture ghosts as having a kind of absent, sleepwalkey demeanor. Also, if I make her wail and moan I'm afraid the piece might become a bit too gloomy for the mood I'm going for. Going to have a think about it tho, thanks for the tip  :y:

(http://i834.photobucket.com/albums/zz263/ErekT_Pixel/Ubume2.gif)
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: Reo on June 11, 2010, 07:30:45 pm
Great animation  :)
I think her other sleeve should move as well.
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: ErekT on June 12, 2010, 05:30:30 pm

Haven't gotten around to fixing the sleeves yet. I keep putting it off for some reason :mean: In the meantime I've been working on some animation to go along with the ghost scene :D This here is the buff player-avatar who comes along to exorcize the ghost. He receives the bundle the ghost is carrying, then discovers it's actually super-heavy. Next follows some heavy button-mashing to keep the hero from dropping the bundle (last three frames). Still need to shade it and create some trembling motion for those end frames.

(http://i834.photobucket.com/albums/zz263/ErekT_Pixel/GetBundle-1.gif)
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: zez on June 13, 2010, 02:48:52 am
Thats... awesome.
I think it could use a transition frame between the middle frame of the player holding it, and the final one where he is almost dropping it, and possibly a slight bounce back on the last frame (like he dropped it ever so slightly further and pulled it back up a little.)
Is there seriously going to be a dont drop the baby mini game? Thats friggin amazing. Just had to say that.
Title: Re: Game sprite: Ubume ghost [WIP]
Post by: ErekT on June 13, 2010, 05:05:15 pm
Is there seriously going to be a dont drop the baby mini game?

Sure why not?  :) The plan is for the ghost to give the player a reward if he manages to hold it long enough, I'm thinking the ability to handle other ghosts later on or something. If he drops the bundle the ghost will scream and disappear. Haven't really decided what's going to happen to the hero then exactly.. except that he dies horribly :crazy:

Anyhow, I fixed up the sleeves and reckon this to be pretty much done for now. Thanks for the help people :)

(http://i834.photobucket.com/albums/zz263/ErekT_Pixel/Ubume3.gif)