Ever caught yourself staring at a spreadsheet while your mind is actually navigating a starship or winning an argument that happened three years ago? It’s a weirdly universal glitch in the human operating system. When people say i live inside my own world of make believe, they usually aren't talking about a clinical detachment from reality. They’re talking about that rich, internal theater we all carry around. It’s the place where we’re more articulate, more adventurous, and significantly more understood than we feel in the cereal aisle of a grocery store.
We live in a world that demands constant presence. Be mindful. Stay grounded. Look at your notifications. But the brain is a restless traveler. It hates being bored.
The phrase itself carries a certain weight, doesn’t it? For some, it’s a confession of loneliness. For others, it’s a badge of creative pride. Honestly, the line between "daydreamer" and "visionary" is often just a matter of whether you eventually write down what you’re seeing in there.
The Science of the "Internal World"
Scientists call this the Default Mode Network (DMN). It’s what happens when your brain isn't focused on a specific task. When you’re washing dishes or waiting for the bus, the DMN kicks in like a screensaver. Dr. Marcus Raichle at Washington University first identified this back in the early 2000s. It’s not just "noise." It’s where your brain processes your identity and simulates future possibilities.
It’s basically a flight simulator for your soul.
Some people take this a step further. You might have heard the term Maladaptive Daydreaming, coined by Dr. Eli Somer. This isn't just "spacing out." It’s intense, immersive, and sometimes involves repetitive physical movements like pacing or rocking. People who experience this feel a compulsive need to return to their "inner world" because the real one feels flat or painful by comparison.
But for the average person, saying i live inside my own world of make believe is just a way of describing a high level of "absorption." This is a psychological trait where you get so lost in a book, a movie, or your own thoughts that the room around you literally fades away. It’s a superpower for writers, but a bit of a liability if you’re supposed to be listening to a safety briefing on an airplane.
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Why We Retreat Into Fantasy
Why do we do it? Life is heavy. That’s the short answer.
Fantasy acts as a pressure valve. If your boss is a nightmare and your rent is due, imagining a world where you have magic powers or a tiny cottage in the woods isn't just "childish." It’s a survival mechanism. It gives the nervous system a break from the cortisol spikes of real-world stress.
Psychologists often point to "Self-Determination Theory" here. We have basic needs: autonomy, competence, and relatedness. If your real life is lacking these—maybe you feel powerless at work or lonely at home—your "make believe" world provides them instantly. You’re the hero. You’re the one in control.
- Emotional Regulation: We use internal stories to "practice" emotions.
- Problem Solving: Ever notice how the best ideas come in the shower? That’s the make-believe world doing the heavy lifting while your conscious mind is on autopilot.
- The Comfort Factor: Your internal world is the only place where you are truly safe from judgment.
Is It Actually Healthy?
There’s a lot of debate about whether living "inside your head" is a bad thing. Older generations might call it "laziness." Modern wellness influencers might call it "manifesting." The truth is somewhere in the middle.
If your internal world helps you plan a better future or keeps your creativity alive, it’s a massive asset. Think about people like J.R.R. Tolkien or George Lucas. They didn’t just visit their worlds of make believe; they moved in and started charging rent to the rest of us.
However, there is a "tipping point." When the internal world becomes a replacement for real-world action, that’s when the gears start to grind. If you’re so busy imagining a perfect relationship that you never actually go on a date, the fantasy is no longer a simulator—it’s a cage.
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I’ve talked to people who feel a genuine sense of grief when they have to "leave" their internal world to deal with reality. That’s a heavy burden to carry. It’s like having a secret life that no one else can see, which is both beautiful and incredibly isolating.
The Cultural Shift Toward Escapism
Look around. We are currently living in the Golden Age of Escapism. From VR headsets to 80-hour RPG video games, the world is making it easier than ever to say i live inside my own world of make believe.
We aren't just daydreaming anymore; we’re outsourcing our daydreams to high-definition screens.
But there’s a difference between "passive" escapism (watching Netflix) and "active" make-believe (building a world in your head). Active make-believe is much better for your cognitive health. It requires effort. You have to maintain the continuity, the characters, and the emotional stakes. It’s a workout for your imagination.
How to Balance the Two Worlds
If you feel like you're spending a bit too much time in the "inner world," you don't have to shut it down. You just need to build a bridge.
The goal isn't to stop being a dreamer. The goal is to make reality interesting enough that you want to check in more often.
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- Externalize the Dream: Write it down. Draw it. Talk about it. When you move a thought from your brain to a piece of paper, it loses its "compulsive" power and becomes a creative project.
- Sensory Grounding: Use the "5-4-3-2-1" technique if you feel yourself drifting too far. Five things you see, four you can touch, three you hear, two you smell, one you can taste. It’s like an anchor for a drifting ship.
- Scheduled Daydreaming: Give yourself "white space." Let yourself stare out the window for 20 minutes with no phone. If you give your brain a dedicated time to play, it’s less likely to hijack your important meetings.
- Check Your "Why": Are you running to something beautiful or from something scary? Addressing the "from" usually makes the "to" much healthier.
Living inside your own world of make believe isn't a defect. It’s part of the human condition. We are the only species on Earth that can imagine things that don't exist and then work together to make them real. The skyscrapers, the internet, the laws we live by—all of them started as make-believe.
The key is making sure you’re the one holding the keys to the kingdom, rather than the kingdom holding you.
Turning Fantasy Into Reality
The most practical thing you can do today is to identify one element of your "make-believe" world that you can bring into the physical one. If you dream of being a world traveler, go to a new neighborhood this weekend. If you dream of being a great artist, buy a cheap sketchbook.
Don't let your inner world be a graveyard for your potential. Use it as a blueprint.
Start by setting a timer for fifteen minutes of "active imagination." Sit in a quiet space and intentionally build out a scene or a goal in your mind. Focus on the details—the smells, the sounds, the specific feeling of success. When the timer goes off, immediately do one small, physical task in the real world. Fold the laundry. Send an email. This trains your brain to transition smoothly between the two states without getting "stuck" in the fantasy.