You know that specific, sinking feeling. It starts as a tiny flutter in your chest or a sudden, unexplained heaviness in your limbs. Maybe you haven’t felt it in months. Maybe you thought you’d finally "beaten" it. Then, out of nowhere, you whisper to yourself: i can feel it coming back again. It isn’t just a phrase; it’s a physiological warning shot. Whether you are talking about the return of clinical depression, a wave of burnout, or the physical symptoms of a chronic illness, that sense of impending recurrence is a deeply human experience that modern neuroscience is finally starting to map out.
It’s scary.
Honestly, the fear of the return is often worse than the return itself. This phenomenon, often called "anticipatory anxiety" or "relapse prodrome," isn't your mind playing tricks on you. Your body is actually incredibly good at detecting subtle shifts in your internal chemistry before your conscious brain can put a name to them.
The Science Behind Why i can feel it coming back again
When you feel a relapse of any kind approaching, you aren't just being "negative." You are experiencing what researchers call interoception. This is your brain’s ability to read internal signals like heartbeat, breath, and gut feelings.
Dr. Stephen Porges, developer of the Polyvagal Theory, suggests that our nervous systems are constantly scanning for cues of safety or danger. When you feel "it" coming back, your dorsal vagal nerve might be starting to take over, shifting you from a state of social engagement into a "freeze" or "shutdown" response. It’s a survival mechanism. Your brain remembers the last time you felt this way. It’s trying to prepare you for the impact.
The "it" people refer to is usually a drop in specific neurotransmitters. In the case of depression or seasonal affective disorder, you might be sensing a dip in serotonin or dopamine availability.
It’s like a weather system. You can’t see the wind, but you see the trees bending. You feel the drop in barometric pressure. Your biology has its own barometers.
The Prodromal Phase: The Warning Signs
In clinical terms, this "coming back" feeling is the prodromal phase. It’s the period between the initial appearance of symptoms and the full-blown onset of the condition. For some, it’s a change in sleep patterns. For others, it’s a specific kind of irritability that feels "off."
Think about the way people describe migraines. Many sufferers experience a "prodrome" days before the pain hits. They might crave chocolate, feel hyperactive, or get incredibly tired. Mental health works the same way. If you’ve been through a period of burnout or anxiety before, your brain creates a neural pathway—a literal physical road—that makes it easier to fall back into those patterns.
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But here’s the thing: knowing that road exists is actually your greatest advantage.
Why We Experience the "Echo" Effect
Why does it come back? Why can't we just heal once and stay healed?
Life isn't linear. Neuroplasticity is a double-edged sword. While your brain can learn new, healthy habits, the old pathways don't just vanish; they become dormant. Stress is usually the catalyst that wakes them up. When life gets heavy—maybe a job change, a breakup, or just a long winter—the brain looks for the path of least resistance. Often, that path is the old, familiar "groove" of the illness or the emotional state you struggled with previously.
It’s often referred to as the "kindling effect" in neurology. This theory suggests that each episode of certain conditions (like depression or seizures) makes the brain more sensitive, meaning a smaller amount of stress can trigger the next episode. It sounds discouraging, but understanding this allows you to intervene earlier. You don't have to wait for the house to be on fire to call the fire department if you smell smoke.
Breaking the Cycle of Anticipatory Dread
The moment you think i can feel it coming back again, your brain enters a feedback loop.
- You feel a small symptom (tiredness, sadness).
- You recognize the symptom from a past bad time.
- You panic that the bad time is returning.
- The panic creates more stress chemicals (cortisol/adrenaline).
- The stress chemicals make the original symptom worse.
Suddenly, you’ve thought yourself into a relapse that might not have happened otherwise. This is what psychologists call "secondary disturbance"—being upset about being upset.
To break this, you have to change your relationship with the "coming back" feeling. Instead of seeing it as a catastrophe, try seeing it as data. It’s just your body saying, "Hey, our resources are low. We need to pivot."
Concrete Strategies for Interception
When the feeling hits, you need a physiological "circuit breaker." You can't just think your way out of a biological shift.
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- Temperature Spikes: If you feel the "heaviness" returning, take a cold shower or hold an ice cube. This triggers the Mammalian Dive Reflex, which forces your heart rate to slow down and resets the nervous system.
- The 48-Hour Rule: When you feel "it" coming back, give yourself a 48-hour window where you make zero major life decisions. Your brain is in a state of perceived threat. It is not the time to quit your job or end a relationship.
- Externalize the Feeling: Give "it" a name. It sounds silly, but separating your identity from the sensation reduces the power of the return. It isn’t "I am getting depressed again"; it’s "The fog is rolling back in."
The Role of Lifestyle "Levers"
We often overlook how much our environment dictates these returns. If you feel it coming back, look at your "levers." Are you sleeping? Are you eating enough protein? Most importantly, have you been isolated?
In a 2021 study published in The Lancet, researchers emphasized that social connection is one of the strongest buffers against relapse in mental health disorders. If you feel "it" coming back, your instinct will be to hide. That is exactly what the "it" wants. The "it" thrives in isolation.
Don't wait until you're in the deep end to reach out. Send a text now. Just say, "Hey, I’m feeling a bit off lately. Can we grab a coffee next week?" You don't need to explain the whole history. You just need to re-engage with the world.
When the Feeling Is Physical
It is important to acknowledge that this isn't always about mental health. Many people with autoimmune conditions or chronic pain use the phrase i can feel it coming back again to describe a "flare."
In conditions like Fibromyalgia, Lupus, or even Long COVID, the "prodrome" is real. You might notice a metallic taste in your mouth, a specific type of skin sensitivity, or "brain fog" that feels different from normal tiredness. In these cases, the "coming back" is a sign of systemic inflammation.
The strategy here is aggressive rest. Not "watching Netflix" rest, but actual sensory deprivation—dark rooms, no screens, deep hydration. By responding to the very first signal of a flare, you can often shorten the duration of the actual episode.
Changing the Narrative of Relapse
We need to stop viewing the return of symptoms as a failure.
If you had asthma and you had an attack after a decade of being fine, you wouldn't say you "failed" at breathing. You’d just use your inhaler. Mental and physical health should be treated with the same pragmatism.
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The fact that you can feel it coming back is actually a sign of progress. It means you are more self-aware than you were the first time. You have a "baseline" now. You know what "good" feels like, which is why the "bad" stands out so clearly. That awareness is a tool.
Actionable Steps to Take Today
If you are currently in that headspace where you feel the shadow of a past struggle returning, do these three things immediately:
1. Conduct a "Biological Audit"
Check your basics. Have you had water? When did you last see the sun? Are you caffeine-crashing? Often, the "it" is exacerbated by simple physiological neglect. Fix the easy stuff first so you can see what’s left.
2. Reduce the Cognitive Load
The moment you feel a relapse approaching, look at your calendar. Delete three things. Anything that isn't essential needs to go. You are entering a period where you need to conserve energy. Do not "power through." Powering through is how people end up in months-long crises instead of weeks-long blips.
3. Contact Your "First Responder"
Whether it’s a therapist, a spouse, or a best friend, tell one person. You don't need them to fix it. You just need someone to know that you're in a "high-alert" phase. This removes the shame of the return, and shame is the fuel that makes these episodes grow.
The feeling of it "coming back" doesn't mean you are back at square one. You are never at square one. You are at square ten, or twenty, or fifty—and you have the map this time. You’ve been here before, and you know the way out.
Focus on the next hour, not the next month. Take the pressure off yourself to stay "perfectly well" and allow yourself to be "recovering." There is a massive difference between the two. One is a rigid prison; the other is a fluid, manageable process.
Take a breath. You're still here.