You walk into a boulangerie in the 11th arrondissement. The smell of yeast and burnt sugar is thick enough to chew on. You’ve practiced your order. You know exactly which croissant you want. But before you can even point at the pastry, the baker looks at you. The silence is heavy. This is the moment where most people mess up how you say hi in french because they think it’s just about a word. It’s not. It’s a social contract.
In France, "Bonjour" isn't a suggestion. It’s a prerequisite for existence. If you skip it, you are basically invisible—or worse, rude.
The Absolute Supremacy of Bonjour
Honestly, if you only learn one word, let it be this one. Bonjour is the king. It is the gatekeeper. Whether you’re entering a high-end boutique on the Champs-Élysées or a tiny hardware store in a village in Provence, you say it. You don't wait for them to say it first. You lead.
But here’s the kicker: you only say it once. If you see the same person again twenty minutes later, saying bonjour a second time makes it seem like you’ve forgotten them. It’s weirdly insulting. In that case, you’d pivot to something like "Re-bonjour," which is basically the "hello again" of the French world.
The word itself is a compound: bon (good) and jour (day). It’s simple, but the weight it carries is massive. According to sociolinguistic studies on French politeness markers, failing to use a greeting before a request is often perceived as an aggressive act. It’s why that waiter was "mean" to you. You didn't acknowledge his humanity before asking for the wine list.
When the Sun Goes Down, the Rules Shift
Timing is everything. You can’t use bonjour at 9:00 PM. Well, you can, but you’ll get a look. Somewhere around 5:00 PM or 6:00 PM—whenever the light starts to fade and the "aperitif" hour begins—France collectively decides it is now evening.
This is where Bonsoir comes in.
It’s the same logic. Bon (good) and soir (evening). If you walk into a restaurant for dinner and chirp "Bonjour!" you’ve immediately outed yourself as someone who doesn't quite get the rhythm of the culture. Is there a precise, legally mandated minute when the switch happens? No. It’s a vibe. If the streetlights are on, stick with bonsoir.
👉 See also: Images of Thanksgiving Holiday: What Most People Get Wrong
Salut: The "Cool" Greeting That Can Get You in Trouble
You've probably heard Salut. It’s catchy. It’s short. It feels casual and effortless. But salut is a double-edged sword.
Think of it like calling someone "dude." You wouldn't walk up to a judge or your future mother-in-law and say, "Hey, dude." You save that for friends, siblings, or people your own age in very relaxed settings.
One fascinating thing about salut is that it’s a linguistic boomerang—it works for both "hi" and "bye." It’s versatile. But if you’re unsure, lean on the side of being too formal. No French person has ever been offended by a "Bonjour," but plenty of older Parisians might bristle at an unearned "Salut."
How You Say Hi in French When You’re Using Slang
French isn't a dead language preserved in a textbook; it’s alive, messy, and constantly evolving. If you’re hanging out in a suburban skate park or a crowded bar in Montpellier, you’re going to hear things that weren't in your high school French 101 syllabus.
The "Ça Va" Loop
Technically, Ça va? means "How's it going?" or "Is it going?" but it often functions as the greeting itself. It’s incredibly common to hear:
"Salut, ça va?"
"Ça va, et toi?"
"Ça va."
It’s a linguistic circle that means almost nothing but serves as the social grease that keeps the conversation moving. You don’t actually have to tell them how you’re doing. In fact, if you start explaining your recent back pain, you’ve misread the room. It’s a ritual, not an inquiry.
Wesh, Coucou, and the Rest
- Coucou: This is what you say to a toddler, a pet, or a very close female friend. It’s cute. It’s high-pitched. It is definitely not for use in a professional setting.
- Wesh: This one is controversial for some. It comes from the banlieues (suburbs) and has roots in Arabic. It’s very "street." Using it as a foreigner can go one of two ways: you either look like you’ve really integrated, or you look like you’re trying way too hard. Proceed with caution.
- Allo: Don't use this in person. This is strictly for the telephone. If you pick up a French phone and say "Bonjour," it feels slightly off. You say "Allo?" with a rising intonation.
The Mystery of the "Bise"
We have to talk about the cheeks.
✨ Don't miss: Why Everyone Is Still Obsessing Over Maybelline SuperStay Skin Tint
How you say hi in french is often accompanied by la bise. This isn't a "kiss" in the way Americans think of it. There is no lip-to-skin contact. It’s a brush of the cheeks while making a kissing sound in the air.
The number of kisses varies by region. In Paris, it’s usually two. In parts of the south or the Loire Valley, it can be three or even four. It’s a minefield. If you’re a man, you generally only do this with women or very close male friends and family. In professional settings? Stick to a firm handshake. Since 2020, the bise took a massive hit for obvious health reasons, but it’s clawing its way back into daily life because the French value that physical social connection.
Contextual Nuance: The Secret Ingredient
If you want to sound authentic, you need to add a "title" to your greeting.
Bonjour, Monsieur.
Bonjour, Madame.
It sounds formal to English speakers, but in French, it’s just the standard level of respect. Adding the title makes you sound like a polished, educated speaker rather than someone just barking a word.
And please, whatever you do, avoid Mademoiselle. While it technically means "Miss," it has been largely phased out of official government documents and is increasingly seen as outdated or even slightly patronizing by younger generations. Just use Madame for any woman. It’s safer, and it’s more modern.
The "Allô" Exception
It's weirdly specific, but "Allô" is only for the phone. Using it in person is a hallmark of someone who learned French through a translation app rather than through immersion. It’s these tiny distinctions that separate the learners from the speakers.
🔗 Read more: Coach Bag Animal Print: Why These Wild Patterns Actually Work as Neutrals
Why Most People Get It Wrong
The biggest mistake isn't the pronunciation. French people know their R’s are hard for us. They don’t care if you gargle your bonjour a little bit.
The mistake is the intent.
In the US or the UK, we often use "Hi" as a passing acknowledgement while we keep walking. In France, the greeting is a pause. You are stopping the world for a split second to acknowledge the person in front of you. When you buy a bus ticket, you say "Bonjour" to the driver. When you enter an elevator, you say "Bonjour" to the strangers. If you don't, you are essentially "mal élevé"—poorly raised.
Actionable Steps for Your Next Interaction
If you’re heading to a French-speaking country soon, don’t overcomplicate it. Follow this hierarchy:
- Default to Bonjour: Use it for everyone, everywhere, until the sun goes down.
- Add the Title: "Bonjour, Madame" is your power move. It instantly earns you 50% more respect from any shopkeeper.
- The Evening Pivot: Switch to "Bonsoir" after 6:00 PM. If you're unsure, just listen to what the person before you said.
- The Handshake vs. Bise: If you’re a tourist, stick to the handshake or a polite nod. Let the local initiate the bise if they feel it’s appropriate.
- Master the "Ça va": Use it as a follow-up to "Salut" only with people you’ve met at least three times.
Most of the time, the "French are rude" stereotype comes from a total misunderstanding of these opening rituals. If you walk up to a desk and start asking questions without a greeting, you’ve broken the rules. You’ve been the rude one. Fix your "Hi," and you’ll find that the "rude" French people suddenly become some of the most helpful people you’ll ever meet.
Start practicing the "u" sound in Bonjour. It’s not "bon-joor" like "door." It’s a tighter, more rounded sound. Purse your lips like you’re about to whistle. It feels ridiculous at first, but that’s how you get the resonance right. Once you nail the phonetics and the social timing, you’re not just saying a word—you’re participating in the culture.