Names are weird. Honestly, they’re one of the most stressful parts of meeting someone new. You see a string of consonants on a screen or a business card and your brain just... freezes. We’ve all been there. You’re about to introduce a speaker at a conference or greet a new client, and suddenly "Nguyen" or "Cholmondeley" looks like an unsolvable riddle.
Getting the pronunciation of last names right isn’t just about phonetics. It’s about respect. It’s about identity. When you butcher someone’s name, you’re basically telling them you couldn't be bothered to learn who they are. That sounds harsh, but names are deeply tied to family history and ethnic pride.
People care. A lot.
Why the Pronunciation of Last Names Is So Messy
English is a thief. It’s a language that follows other languages into dark alleys and goes through their pockets for loose grammar and vocabulary. Because of that, surnames in the U.S., UK, and Australia are a total disaster zone of linguistic rules.
Take the name "Featherstonhaugh." In some British circles, that’s pronounced "Fanshaw." No, really.
There is a massive disconnect between how a name is spelled and how it sounds, mostly because of how names were transcribed at border crossings or how families decided to "Anglicize" things to fit in better decades ago.
History is messy. Names are the scars of that messiness.
The Science of "Phonetic Anxiety"
Why do we panic? Psychologists call it "cognitive load." When you encounter a name that doesn't fit your native language's phonetic patterns, your brain has to work overtime to map those letters to sounds. This often leads to "the stumble." You know it—the half-second pause where your eyes go wide and you let out a nervous "Uh..."
Dr. Rita Kohli at the University of California, Riverside, has actually studied the impact of "name mispronunciation" in educational settings. She found that it can lead to a sense of "othering." It’s not just a slip of the tongue; it’s a microaggression, even if it’s totally accidental.
Nuance matters here.
Some people are super chill about their names being mangled. They’ve spent forty years hearing every variation of their surname and they just don't have the energy to correct you anymore. Others find it incredibly disrespectful. You never know which person you’re talking to until you try.
Common Trap Names and How to Navigate Them
Let’s look at some real-world examples that trip everyone up.
Nguyen
This is the big one. It’s the most common Vietnamese surname, yet it’s the one Westerners struggle with most. Most people try to say "New-wen" or "Nuh-guy-en." Neither is quite right. In most contexts, it’s closer to "Win" or "Wen." If you want to be more precise, it’s a soft "Ng" sound at the start, like the end of the word "sing," followed by a rising tone. But "Win" gets you 90% of the way there without looking like you're trying too hard.
Beauvais
French names are a minefield of silent letters. You see "Beauvais" and you want to say "Bo-vays." Stop. It’s "Bo-vay." The 's' is a ghost.
Siobhan and Saoirse
Okay, these are first names, but the Irish surname rules are the same. Names like "Doherty" or "Gallagher" vary wildly depending on whether you’re in Dublin or New Jersey. In the US, "Doherty" is "Dough-er-tee." In Ireland? More like "Dock-er-ty" with a soft 'ch' sound.
Zhang and Xiao
Mandarin surnames are tough because of the tones. "Zhang" isn't "Zang." It’s closer to "Jong" with a very soft 'j'. "Xiao" is "She-ow."
The "Ask and Echo" Method
If you aren't sure, just ask. It’s that simple.
But there’s a right way to ask. Don't say, "Wow, that looks hard, how do you say that?" That makes the person feel like an alien. Instead, try: "I want to make sure I’m saying your name correctly. Could you pronounce it for me?"
Once they say it, echo it back immediately. "It's pronounced Moo-shuh-low-ski."
"Mouszalowski. Got it. Thank you."
This reinforces the neural pathway in your brain. It also shows you actually listened instead of just nodding while waiting for your turn to talk.
Does It Actually Matter for Your Career?
Short answer: Yes.
In business, your name is your brand. If a recruiter or a potential partner can't say your name, they might subconsciously avoid calling you. It’s a documented bias. A 2011 study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology found that people with "easier-to-pronounce" names are often judged more positively than those with "difficult" names.
Is that fair? Absolutely not. Is it a reality? Unfortunately.
If you have a name that people struggle with, some experts suggest adding a phonetic spelling to your LinkedIn profile or email signature.
Example: Janez (Yah-nez) Novak.
It saves everyone the headache. It removes the friction from the interaction.
The Cultural Shift in Media
We’re seeing a change, though. Look at sports broadcasting. For decades, American announcers just butchered international names without a second thought. Now, guys like Giannis Antetokounmpo (Ah-det-o-koon-bo) have forced the media to get it right.
Broadcast crews now get "pronunciation guides" before games. These are literally cheat sheets that break down every player’s name into syllables. If a guy making $40 million a year expects you to say his name right, your new neighbor probably does too.
Tools That Actually Help
You don't have to guess.
- Forvo: This is the gold standard. It’s a crowdsourced pronunciation dictionary where native speakers record themselves saying words and names. If it’s on Forvo, it’s probably right.
- NameShouts: A tool specifically designed for names. It’s great for HR departments or teachers who have to get through a long list of unfamiliar surnames.
- YouTube: Just search "How to pronounce [Name]." You’ll usually find a video of someone with that name introduced at an award ceremony or a news clip. It’s the easiest way to hear the natural cadence.
Stop Over-Complicating the Phonetics
Sometimes we try too hard. We put on a fake accent that makes it worse. You don't need to do a perfect Rolling 'R' if you aren't a native Spanish speaker; just getting the syllables in the right order is usually enough to show you’re trying.
Most people appreciate the effort more than the perfection.
What they don't appreciate is the "nickname" trap. Never, ever say: "That’s too hard, can I just call you 'G'?" No. You cannot. Unless they explicitly offer a nickname, use their name. Using a nickname because you’re too lazy to learn a surname is the height of entitlement.
What to Do When You Mess Up
You will mess up. It’s inevitable. When you do, don't make a big production out of it.
"Oh my god, I am so sorry, I’m so bad with names, I’ve been trying so hard..."
This makes it about your feelings and your guilt. Now the other person has to comfort you for messing up their name. It’s exhausting.
Just apologize, correct yourself, and move on.
"I'm sorry, I said that wrong. It's Nguyen, right? Thank you."
That’s it. Minimal drama.
Actionable Steps for Better Pronunciation
If you want to stop being "that person" who stumbles through every introduction, follow these steps:
- Check the LinkedIn Audio: Many people now record themselves saying their names on their LinkedIn profiles. Check it before the meeting.
- Write it Phonetically: If you’re giving a speech, don't write the name. Write the sound. Write "SMICK-ul-son" instead of "Smychelson."
- Listen for the Correction: If you say a name and the person says it back to you slightly differently, they are correcting you. Pay attention. Don't ignore the hint.
- Use Visual Mnemonics: If the name is "Kocinski," think "Coach-in-ski." Visualize a coach in a ski mask. It sounds silly, but your brain remembers images better than sounds.
The pronunciation of last names is a skill, not a talent. It takes practice. It takes a bit of humility. But in a world where everyone is rushing, taking thirty seconds to learn how to say a name properly makes you stand out for all the right reasons.
Don't be the person who gives up. Be the person who gets it right.
Next Steps for Mastery
Start by auditing your own contact list. Look for names you’ve been "avoiding" saying out loud and look them up on Forvo. If you have a high-stakes meeting coming up, find the person on social media—often people have videos or interviews where their name is spoken clearly. Practice the name five times out loud while driving or walking. The physical muscle memory in your jaw and tongue is just as important as the mental recognition of the letters.