How to Make a Brass Monkey Drink Without Overcomplicating It

You’ve probably heard the song. That infectious 1986 Beastie Boys track practically cemented the "Brass Monkey" into the cultural lexicon of anyone who appreciates a good time. But here's the thing: if you ask three different bartenders how to make a brass monkey drink, you’re going to get three wildly different recipes. One guy is going to reach for a bottle of pre-mixed cocktail from the 80s that tastes like orange-flavored cleaning supplies. Another is going to pour you a sophisticated rum-based cocktail in a highball glass. And the third? Well, that guy is just going to hand you a 40-ounce bottle of Olde English with a splash of OJ.

It's confusing. Honestly, it’s a mess.

The reality is that "Brass Monkey" isn't just one drink. It's an evolution. It started as a bottled cocktail, transitioned into a DIY malt liquor "sidewalk slammer," and eventually found a home in the craft cocktail world as a legit drink worth ordering at a bar that doesn't have sawdust on the floor. Whether you want the gritty, nostalgic version or the one that actually tastes like a vacation, knowing the difference is key to not being disappointed when that first sip hits your tongue.

The Heady History of a Misunderstood Classic

Most people assume the Beastie Boys were rapping about a drink they mixed up in a kitchen. They weren't. Mike D, MCA, and Ad-Rock were actually singing about a pre-mixed cocktail produced by the Heublein Company. Back in the 70s and 80s, Heublein sold these little cans and bottles of "The Brass Monkey." It was a proprietary blend of vodka, rum, and orange juice. It was cheap. It was effective. It was basically the precursor to the modern hard seltzer or canned cocktail craze, just with a lot more sugar and a lot less "natural flavoring."

The marketing for the original bottled drink was legendary. They created a fake backstory about a spy named H.E. Rasske who operated a bar in Macau during WWII. It was all nonsense, of course, but it worked. People loved the mystery. When Heublein eventually stopped producing the drink, a vacuum was left behind. Fans of the song wanted the drink, but the drink didn't exist anymore.

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This is where the malt liquor version comes in.

In the late 80s and 90s, "Brass Monkey" became synonymous with a specific DIY concoction. You take a 40-ounce bottle of malt liquor—usually Olde English 800—drink it down to the top of the label, and then fill the rest of the bottle with orange juice. It’s a "poor man’s mimosa." It’s a drink of necessity and college-aged daring. It’s also surprisingly drinkable, which is probably why it stuck around long after the Heublein cans vanished from liquor store shelves.

How to Make a Brass Monkey Drink: The Three Main Methods

If you want to do this right, you have to choose your path. You're either going for the "Beastie Boys Nostalgia," the "College Party Classic," or the "Modern Craft Version." Each one hits different.

The "40-Ounce" Sidewalk Slammer

This is the version most people mean when they talk about a Brass Monkey today. It is low-brow, high-volume, and deeply satisfying on a hot afternoon when you don't want to deal with shakers or strainers.

Go get a 40oz bottle of malt liquor. It has to be cold. Like, painfully cold. Drink about a quarter of it. You need enough "headspace" in the bottle to accommodate the juice. Pour in some high-pulp orange juice. Give it a gentle swirl—don't shake it, or you'll end up with a sticky explosion—and you’re done. Some people call this a "Lunchbox," but in most circles, this is the definitive Brass Monkey.

The Heublein Recreation (The "True" Beastie Boys Drink)

Since you can't buy the original cans anymore, you have to build it from scratch. This version is more of a potent punch than a beer cocktail.

1. 1 part Vodka (nothing fancy, just something that doesn't burn).
2. 1 part Dark Rum (this adds the "funk" the original was known for).
3. 2 parts Orange Juice.

Mix these in a glass over ice. If you want to be authentic to the 80s vibe, use the cheapest OJ you can find. The rum provides a molasses-heavy backbone that cuts through the citrus, making it taste significantly more complex than a standard Screwdriver.

The Elevated Craft Approach

Bartenders today have reclaimed the name. If you walk into a high-end cocktail bar and ask for a Brass Monkey, you might get something that looks like a tiki drink. This version focuses on the interaction between the botanical notes of the spirits and the acidity of the fruit.

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Use a high-quality Jamaican rum, a clean potato vodka, and fresh-squeezed orange juice. Add a dash of orange bitters to tie it all together. Shake it with ice and strain it into a chilled glass. It’s sophisticated. It’s balanced. It’s a far cry from the 40-ounce bottle, but it’s delicious.

Why the Ingredients Actually Matter

It’s easy to say "just throw some juice in there," but the chemistry of a Brass Monkey is actually pretty interesting. Malt liquor is inherently sweet and a bit heavy. Orange juice is acidic. When you combine them, the acid cuts through the cloying sweetness of the corn-heavy malt liquor, while the carbonation of the beer makes the orange juice feel lighter and more refreshing.

If you’re making the rum/vodka version, the choice of rum is the "make or break" moment. A light silver rum will disappear. You want a dark rum or a spiced rum. The vanilla and caramel notes in the rum play off the orange juice in a way that mimics a "creamsicle" vibe, but with a punch.

Pro tip: If you're doing the malt liquor version, don't use a straw. It’s weird. Just drink it out of the bottle. If you’re feeling fancy, garnish the craft version with a wide orange twist to get those aromatic oils right on the surface of the drink.

Common Mistakes to Avoid

• Using Warm Beer: There is no faster way to ruin this drink. Warm malt liquor has a distinct "breadiness" that becomes borderline nauseating when mixed with lukewarm juice. Keep everything in the fridge until the very last second.
• The Wrong Ratio: If you add too much OJ, you’re just drinking thin, weird-tasting juice. If you don't add enough, you’re just drinking malt liquor. The "top of the label" rule is a rule for a reason. It’s roughly a 3:1 ratio of beer to juice.
• Forgetting the Rum: If you're trying to recreate the original bottled flavor, vodka alone won't do it. You need that rum. Without it, you're just making a Screwdriver, and that’s a different beast entirely.

Is the Brass Monkey Still Relevant?

In a world of $18 craft cocktails and artisanal mezcals, a drink made in a beer bottle might seem like a relic. But there’s a reason it persists. It’s approachable. It’s cheap. It has a story.

Cultural icons like the Beastie Boys gave it a permanent spot in the hall of fame, but the drink’s versatility is what keeps it on menus and at house parties. It’s a bridge between the world of "serious" drinking and the world of "just having a good time." It doesn't take itself seriously, and honestly, more drinks should be like that.

The Brass Monkey is a reminder that you don't need a degree in mixology to make something that people enjoy. Sometimes, the best things in life are the result of a little experimentation and a catchy chorus.

Making It Your Own

Once you’ve mastered the basics, you can start tweaking it. Some people add a splash of Galliano to the rum version to lean into that herbal, vanilla profile (essentially making it a "Harvey Wallbanger" hybrid). Others prefer to use blood orange juice for a tarter, more visual "pop."

If you're doing the 40-ounce version, try a different base. While Olde English is the traditional choice, a Colt 45 or even a high-gravity lager can change the flavor profile significantly. Just remember: the goal is refreshment, not a science project.

Actionable Steps for the Perfect Brass Monkey

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1. Pick your style: Decide if you want the "40-ounce" experience or the "cocktail" experience.
2. Chill everything: Put your beer, spirits, and juice in the freezer for 20 minutes before mixing.
3. The Mix: If using malt liquor, drink to the label and fill with OJ. If making the cocktail, use a 1:1:2 ratio of vodka, dark rum, and orange juice.
4. The Swirl: Never shake a carbonated drink. A gentle stir or a slow tilt of the bottle is all you need to integrate the flavors.
5. Serve and enjoy: Drink it immediately while the carbonation is at its peak.

For those looking to dive deeper into 80s cocktail culture, researching the rise and fall of the Heublein Company's pre-mixed line offers a fascinating look at how we used to drink before the "craft" revolution took over. You might find that some of those old recipes are worth a modern revival.