How to Know Someone's Birthday on Facebook Without Feeling Like a Stalker

How to Know Someone's Birthday on Facebook Without Feeling Like a Stalker

Ever had that sudden, cold spike of adrenaline when you realize it’s potentially a close friend's birthday and you have absolutely no idea? You don't want to ask. That’s awkward. It makes it look like you don't care, even though you definitely do, you just have a memory like a sieve. So, you head to social media. But figuring out how to know someone's birthday on facebook isn't as straightforward as it used to be back in 2012 when everyone’s wall was a chaotic mess of "HBD!" posts.

Privacy settings changed everything.

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People got shy. Or maybe they just got tired of random acquaintances from high school sliding into their notifications once a year. Whatever the reason, finding that specific date can sometimes feel like a digital scavenger hunt. Honestly, it’s a bit of a craft. You’ve got to know where to look, what to click, and when to admit that someone has locked their profile down tighter than Fort Knox.

The Standard Method: Where Facebook Hides the Goods

If the person hasn't gone full "incognito mode" with their privacy settings, the easiest way to find a birthday is still the "About" section. It's the first place any sane person looks. On a desktop, you just navigate to their profile, click the About tab, and then hit Contact and Basic Info. If they’re sharing it, it’ll be right there, usually under "Basic Information."

Mobile is a different beast. You tap the "See [Name]'s About Info" link right under their profile bio.

But here’s the kicker: many people only share the month and day. They hide the year. Why? Because age is a sensitive subject for some, and for others, it's a security thing. Identity thieves love birth years. If you’re looking for a specific age to buy a "Happy 30th" card and it's not there, you might have to do some math based on their high school graduation year, which—let's be real—is usually listed further down the page.

Using the Notifications and Events Hack

Sometimes the direct approach fails because you can't find the "About" section or it’s restricted. This is where the Facebook Events tool becomes your best friend.

Facebook actually aggregates all upcoming birthdays for your friends in one specific place. If you're on a computer, look at the left-hand sidebar on your home feed. Click Events, and then look for Birthdays in the menu. This gives you a chronological list of everyone having a birthday today, tomorrow, and later this week.

It’s efficient. It’s clean.

But what if you need to know a birthday that’s six months away? The calendar view in the Events section allows you to scroll through. If they have their birthday set to "Friends," they will appear on that calendar. It’s a bit tedious to click through every month, but it works when the "About" page is a dead end.

What if they aren't on the list?

If someone doesn't appear in the Birthdays tab under Events, they have likely set their birthday visibility to "Only Me." At that point, Facebook basically treats that data as top-secret information. No matter how many times you refresh or what "trick" you try, if they don't want it seen, the platform won't show it.

The Search Bar Secret (The "Wall Post" Method)

This is a bit more "private investigator" style. It’s a way to figure out how to know someone's birthday on facebook by looking at their past interactions.

Go to the person’s profile. Look for the magnifying glass icon (the "Search" tool) specifically for their profile, not the main Facebook search bar. Type in "Happy Birthday" or "HBD."

Facebook will then filter every post ever made on their timeline that contains those words. Look at the dates of those posts. If you see a massive influx of "Happy Birthday!" messages on October 14th, 2024, and another batch on October 14th, 2023... well, you don't need to be Sherlock Holmes to figure out their birthday is October 14th.

It's foolproof. Unless, of course, they’ve hidden their timeline or deleted old posts. But most people aren't that diligent about scrubbing their digital history.

Why You Can't See Birthdays Anymore: The Privacy Shift

Let's talk about why this has become so hard. Facebook has faced immense pressure regarding data privacy over the last decade. Following the Cambridge Analytica scandal and various GDPR updates in Europe, the default settings for new accounts became much more restrictive.

A lot of users also realized that a birthday is a key piece of PII (Personally Identifiable Information). If a hacker has your full name and your birthday, they are halfway to verifying your identity with a bank or a cell phone provider.

Consequently, "Birthday Notifications" aren't as reliable as they used to be. You might notice you get notifications for some friends but not others. This isn't a glitch. It’s a choice. Users can opt-out of letting Facebook broadcast their birthday to their entire friend list. If they’ve unchecked that box, you won’t get that 9:00 AM ping on your phone telling you it's time to write on their wall.

Alternate Routes: When Facebook Fails

When you're truly stuck, you have to look outside the blue app.

  • Instagram Stories: Since Meta owns both, people often cross-post. Look for "Birthday" highlights on their Instagram profile. People love a birthday shoutout on Stories.
  • The "Common Friend" Tactic: Just message a mutual friend. "Hey, I'm trying to organize something for Sarah, do you remember when her birthday is?" It’s human. It’s simple. It works.
  • LinkedIn: Strangely, people often forget to hide their birthdays on LinkedIn. It’s tucked away in the "Contact Info" section of their profile.
  • Google Search: If they are a public figure or have a professional website, a simple search of "Name + Birthday" might pull up a bio or an old press release.

Managing Your Own Birthday Privacy

Since you're digging into someone else's info, you might want to check what you are broadcasting to the world.

If you want to hide your own birthday, go to your profile, hit About, then Contact and Basic Info. Look for the birthday section and click the audience selector (the little icon that looks like a globe, people, or a lock). Change it to Only Me.

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You can also split it. You can let people see the day and month so you get the "Happy Birthday!" messages, but keep the year private so people don't know exactly how old you're turning. This is a popular middle-ground for people who want the social interaction without the "age-reveal."

Practical Next Steps for the Forgetful

Knowing how to know someone's birthday on facebook is a great skill, but relying on it every year is a recipe for disaster. Once you actually find the date, don't just leave it on the site.

  1. Sync to Google Calendar: As soon as you find the date, manually add it to your primary digital calendar. Set a reminder for two days before so you have time to buy a gift or a card.
  2. Use a "Contact" App: Apps like Brewster or even the basic Contacts app on your iPhone/Android have a field for birthdays. Fill it out.
  3. Export Facebook Birthdays: There are browser extensions that claim to export your Facebook friend birthdays to an .ics file for your calendar. Be careful with these—only use highly-rated, verified extensions to avoid compromising your account security.

The reality of modern social media is that we are moving toward less sharing, not more. The "golden age" of having everyone’s personal data at our fingertips is ending. Being a good friend now requires a little more manual effort and a little less reliance on an algorithm to remind you to care.

If you've checked the About section, scrolled through the Events tab, and searched their wall posts with no luck, the most "human" thing to do is simply wait for a mutual friend to post a story, or—if you're feeling brave—just ask them. Most people actually find it flattering that you want to know so you can celebrate them properly.


Actionable Insights:

  • Primary check: Use the "About" > "Contact and Basic Info" path first.
  • Deep dive: Use the profile-specific search bar for "Birthday" to see past wall posts.
  • Global view: Check the "Events" > "Birthdays" tab on the desktop sidebar for a full list of upcoming celebrations.
  • Privacy note: If the info is hidden, respect that boundary; it’s likely a conscious choice for data security.
  • Future-proofing: Immediately move any found dates into a personal calendar with a 48-hour lead time reminder.