How much should I weigh for my height and weight: Why the "Perfect Number" is Actually a Myth

How much should I weigh for my height and weight: Why the "Perfect Number" is Actually a Myth

You’re standing on the scale. The little digital numbers blink up at you, and suddenly, you’re hit with that nagging question: how much should I weigh for my height and weight? It’s a question that has haunted doctor’s offices and locker rooms for decades. Most of us just want a simple answer. Give me a number. Tell me if I’m "normal."

But here’s the thing. The number you’re looking for might not actually exist in the way you think it does.

We’ve been conditioned to look at those colorful charts on the wall that tell us if we’re green, yellow, or red. Usually, these are based on the Body Mass Index (BMI). It’s a formula that’s been around since the mid-1800s, created by a Belgian mathematician named Adolphe Quetelet. Think about that for a second. We are using 19th-century math to determine 21st-century health. Quetelet wasn't even a doctor; he was a statistician trying to find the "average man" for social research.

BMI is basically your weight in kilograms divided by your height in meters squared. It’s quick. It’s cheap. It’s also incredibly limited. If you have a lot of muscle—say you’re a weightlifter or a dedicated athlete—the BMI will likely label you as "overweight" or even "obese." Why? Because muscle is denser than fat. The scale doesn't know the difference between a pound of bicep and a pound of visceral belly fat. It just feels the gravity.


The BMI Trap and What Doctors Actually Look At

While BMI is a starting point, it's really just a screening tool. It isn't a diagnosis. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), a BMI between 18.5 and 24.9 is considered the "healthy" range for adults. If you’re under 18.5, you’re "underweight." Over 25? You’re "overweight." Reach 30, and you’re in the "obesity" category.

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It sounds tidy. It isn't.

Dr. Nick Fuller from the University of Sydney often points out that weight is just one tiny piece of the health puzzle. You could be "overweight" by BMI standards but have perfect blood pressure, clear arteries, and great blood sugar levels. Conversely, someone could be "thin" but have dangerously high levels of internal fat surrounding their organs—what researchers call TOFI (Thin on the Outside, Fat on the Inside).

So, if the scale is lying to us, what should we actually be measuring?

Waist-to-Height Ratio (WtHR)

This is a much better predictor of health risks than just weight. Honestly, it’s simple to do at home. Take a piece of string, measure your height, then fold that string in half. If that halved string can’t fit around your waist, you might have too much abdominal fat.

Science backs this up. A study published in the Journal of Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism found that your waist circumference is a far more accurate indicator of your risk for Type 2 diabetes and heart disease than BMI. We’re talking about visceral fat here—the nasty stuff that wraps around your liver and kidneys. That’s what actually matters.

Body Fat Percentage

This is the real gold standard. A marathon runner and a couch potato might weigh the exact same, but their body compositions are worlds apart. For men, a healthy body fat range is typically 14% to 24%. For women, it’s 21% to 31%. Women naturally need more fat for hormonal health and reproductive function. If a woman's body fat drops too low, her body literally starts shutting down non-essential systems, like her menstrual cycle. It’s a survival mechanism.


Why Your Age and Biology Change the Answer

The "ideal" weight for a 20-year-old is rarely the ideal weight for a 60-year-old. Our bodies shift. Sarcopenia—the natural loss of muscle mass as we age—means that the scale might stay the same even as we lose strength and gain fat.

Actually, there is something called the "obesity paradox" in geriatric medicine. Some studies suggest that for older adults (65+), being slightly "overweight" according to BMI might actually be protective. It provides a nutritional reserve in case of serious illness or surgery. If you get a bad bout of pneumonia at 75, having a little extra weight can literally be a lifesaver.

The Role of Bone Density

Some people really are "big-boned." It’s not just a joke people tell to feel better. Frame size varies. A person with a small frame will have a different healthy weight than someone with a large frame, even if they are the exact same height. You can test this by wrapping your thumb and middle finger around your wrist.

  • If they overlap: Small frame.
  • If they touch: Medium frame.
  • If there’s a gap: Large frame.

This doesn't give you a license to ignore your health, but it does explain why two people can look so different at the same weight.

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Environmental and Genetic "Set Points"

Ever notice how some people seem to stay the same weight no matter what they eat, while others look at a bagel and gain three pounds? That’s the "Set Point Theory." Your body has a biological thermostat for weight. It’s controlled by the hypothalamus in your brain and hormones like leptin (which tells you you're full) and ghrelin (the hunger hormone).

When you try to drop your weight significantly below your set point, your body panics. It thinks you’re starving. Your metabolism slows down, and your hunger hormones spike. This is why "yo-yo dieting" is so common. You aren't failing; your biology is just trying to "save" you from a famine that isn't happening.

Instead of asking "how much should I weigh for my height and weight," a better question is: "At what weight does my body function best?"

Think about your energy levels. Are you sleeping well? Can you climb a flight of stairs without gasping for air? Is your mood stable? These are "Non-Scale Victories" (NSVs). They are infinitely more important than the number on your bathroom floor.


Actionable Steps to Finding Your Healthy Range

Stop chasing a "dream number" you saw in a magazine. It’s fake. Instead, use these metrics to gauge where you actually stand.

1. Measure your waist. Forget the scale for a minute. Take a tape measure. For women, a waist circumference over 35 inches can indicate higher health risks. For men, it’s over 40 inches. This is a much more direct link to heart health than your total weight.

2. Check your "Basics."
Get a blood panel done. If your cholesterol, triglycerides, and A1C (blood sugar) are in the healthy range, your current weight is likely fine for your biology, regardless of what the BMI chart says.

3. Test your functional strength.
Can you do a "sit-to-stand" test? Sit on the floor and try to stand up using as little help from your hands as possible. This is a famous longevity marker. If your weight is preventing you from moving through your daily life comfortably, that's when it becomes a clinical issue.

4. Ditch the "Goal Weight" mindset.
Instead of aiming for 150 lbs, aim for a 10-minute walk after every meal. Aim for 30 grams of protein at breakfast. Focus on the inputs—the things you can control—rather than the output on the scale.

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5. Consider your ethnicity.
This is a huge limitation of standard charts. Research shows that people of Asian descent often have higher risks for cardiovascular disease at lower BMIs. For many Asian populations, the "overweight" threshold is actually 23, not 25. Standardized Western charts often fail to account for these genetic variations in fat distribution.

Weight is a data point, not a destiny. It’s one instrument in the orchestra. If the violin is slightly out of tune but the rest of the symphony sounds incredible, you’re doing just fine. Focus on how you feel, how you move, and how your bloodwork looks. Everything else is just noise.

The most important thing to remember is that "healthy" doesn't have a specific look. It’s a state of function. If you are eating whole foods most of the time, moving your body regularly, and managing your stress, your body will eventually settle into the weight it was meant to be at. Trust that process more than a 150-year-old math equation.

Actionable Insight: Tomorrow morning, don't step on the scale. Instead, track how many glasses of water you drink and how many minutes you spend outside. Shift the metric from "weight" to "wellness," and you’ll find the anxiety about your "perfect number" starts to evaporate.