You're standing there, maybe in a sun-drenched plaza in Lyon or just finishing a FaceTime call with a new Parisian friend, and you want to end on a sweet note. You want to say "kiss kiss." But then you freeze. Does "bisou bisou" sound too childish? Is "bises" too formal? Honestly, figuring out how do you say kiss kiss in french is less about a direct dictionary translation and more about navigating a cultural minefield of affection.
French isn't just a language; it’s a high-wire act of social cues. If you use the wrong word for a kiss, you might accidentally tell your boss you want to make out with them, or tell your crush you view them as a distant aunt. It's weirdly nuanced.
The Most Common Way: Bisous and Bises
If you want the quick answer to how do you say kiss kiss in French, the most likely candidate is bisous. Specifically, saying it twice—bisous, bisous—is very common in casual speech. It’s light. It’s airy. It’s what you say to your best friend, your sibling, or that person you’ve been dating for three weeks.
But wait. There is a distinction.
Bisou is the cute, affectionate word. Think of it as the "smooch" of the French world. Bise, on the other hand, is more formal but paradoxically also more common in the physical act of "la bise" (that cheek-kissing ritual that confuses every American tourist). When you write an email to a colleague you’re friendly with, you might end with Bises. You would almost never end it with Bisous unless you’ve shared a few bottles of Bordeaux and several years of friendship.
When to use Bisou vs. Bise
Actually, let’s get specific. Use bisous when you’re being warm. Use bises when you’re being social.
I remember a linguist, Camille Chevalier-Karfis, once explaining that bisous is much more "affective." It carries weight. If a guy you like sends you a text that ends in bisous, he’s into you. If he sends bises, you’re probably just a pal. It’s a brutal distinction, but a necessary one to understand if you’re trying to decode French dating.
The Physical Act: La Bise
You can't talk about saying "kiss kiss" without talking about doing it. La bise is the social glue of France. But here is where it gets tricky: different regions have different "kiss counts."
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In Paris? It’s two. One for each cheek.
In Montpellier? You’re looking at three.
Some parts of the north or the deep south? Four.
It is an absolute nightmare for the uninitiated. You go in for two, they stay for a third, and suddenly you’re awkwardy bumping noses. When people ask how do you say kiss kiss in french, they are often trying to describe this rhythmic greeting. To "make the kiss" is faire la bise.
"Faire la bise is not actually about kissing. Your lips shouldn't really touch the skin. It’s a brush of the cheeks and a kissing sound made in the air." — This is the golden rule. Don't be the person who actually plants a wet one on a stranger's face.
Texting and Social Media: The Digital Kiss
In the digital age, the way you say "kiss kiss" has evolved into shorthand. You’ll see XOXO in English, but the French have their own vibe.
- Bx: Short for bisous. Usually used by teenagers or people in a massive rush.
- Gros bisous: This means "big kisses." It sounds like it would be romantic, but it’s actually very platonic. It’s what your grandma writes in a birthday card.
- Bisous baveux: Okay, this one is "slimy kisses." It’s a joke. People say it to be silly with close friends or kids. Don't use this on a first date unless you want it to be the last one.
The repetition is key. Say it once (bisou), and it’s a statement. Say it twice (bisou bisou), and it’s a rhythmic sign-off that mimics the physical act of la bise.
Is There a Romantic Version?
Absolutely. But you have to be careful. The word for a romantic kiss—the kind with tongue—is un baiser.
Here is the linguistic trap: baiser as a noun means "a kiss." However, baiser as a verb has evolved into a very vulgar slang term for having sex. If you say "Je veux te baiser," you aren't asking for a sweet kiss; you are being incredibly graphic.
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If you want to say "to kiss" romantically as a verb, use embrasser. It’s classic. It’s elegant. It literally means to take someone in your arms (bras).
How Do You Say Kiss Kiss in French for Kids?
If you’re talking to a child, or if a child is talking to you, the word changes again. You might hear un poutou.
Poutou is a regional word, mostly from the south (Occitan roots), but it has spread. It’s the equivalent of "peck" or "kissy." It’s adorable. If someone says "Fais un poutou à Mamie," they are telling the kid to give Grandma a little peck on the cheek.
The Weird History of "Le French Kiss"
It’s funny, but the French didn't even have a specific word for "French kissing" until relatively recently. In 2014, the Petit Robert dictionary finally added the verb galocher.
Before that, they just called it embrasser avec la langue (kissing with the tongue). Kind of clinical, right? Despite their reputation as the world's greatest lovers, the French were surprisingly late to the game of naming their most famous export.
Context Is Everything
Imagine you’re leaving a bakery. You wouldn’t say bisous to the baker. That’s a one-way ticket to a very confused look. You say merci, au revoir.
But if you’re leaving a dinner party? You might spend twenty minutes doing la bise to every single person in the room while saying "Allez, bisous !" as you head out the door. It’s a collective sign-off. It’s the "y'all" of French affection.
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A Quick Cheat Sheet for Reality
- Best friend: "Bisous, bisous !"
- A sibling: "Gros bisous."
- Someone you're flirting with: "Je t'embrasse." (This is classy and suggestive).
- Professional contact you like: "Bien à vous" or "Bises" (if you’ve met in person).
- A literal baby: "Un petit poutou ?"
Why the Repetition Matters
Why do we specifically ask how do you say kiss kiss in french with the double "kiss"? It’s because the French love repetition for emphasis and cuteness.
Coucou (hello), tout doux (gently), bisou bisou.
It softens the language. It makes the interaction feel less transactional and more human. In a culture that can sometimes feel formal and rigid with its "vous" and "monsieur," the double bisou is a shortcut to intimacy.
Avoiding the "Cringe" Factor
The biggest mistake learners make is overusing bisous. If you’re not sure, wait for the French person to initiate. If they end a text with it, you’re safe to fire it back.
Also, pay attention to gender. While men certainly say bisous to women and to their family, some French men (especially of the older generation) might be more reserved with other men, opting for a firm handshake or a "salut" instead of the verbal or physical kiss. However, in younger circles, "un mec" (a guy) will absolutely say "bisous" to his bros. It’s becoming way more common.
Real-World Application: The "Je t'embrasse" Move
If you want to sound truly fluent and sophisticated, move away from the "kiss kiss" repetition and use the phrase "Je t'embrasse." It translates to "I kiss you," but it carries a warmth that bisous lacks. It’s what you write at the end of a long, heartfelt letter. It’s what you say on the phone when you really miss someone. It’s powerful. It’s the "adult" version of saying kiss kiss.
Actionable Next Steps for Mastering French Affection
- Audit your texts: If you're talking to a French speaker, look at how they sign off. If they use "Bises," match their energy. Don't escalate to "Gros bisous" too fast.
- Practice the sound: The "u" in bisou is tricky for English speakers. Pull your lips tight like you're whistling and try to say "eee." That's the spot.
- Learn the map: Before visiting a specific French city, Google "combien de bises [city name]" to avoid the awkward "third-kiss" collision.
- Use "Je t'embrasse" for impact: Save this for someone you actually care about. It’s the most authentic way to show deep affection without sounding like a textbook.
- Don't overthink it: At the end of the day, the French are used to foreigners fumbling their greetings. A sincere "bisous" with a smile will always be better than a perfectly conjugated but cold "au revoir."
The nuance of French isn't found in the grammar books; it's found in these tiny, repetitive bursts of affection. Whether it's a poutou for a toddler or a bisou for a friend, you're now equipped to handle the "kiss kiss" culture like a local.