You're sitting there, maybe at a red light or staring at a laptop screen that’s been idle for twenty minutes, and this nagging weight hits your chest. It’s that feeling of being spiritually adrift. You want to know how do I get closer to God, but every time you try, it feels like you're shouting into a void or following a checklist that someone else wrote three hundred years ago. It’s frustrating. Honestly, it’s isolating.
The disconnect isn't usually because you’ve done something "bad." It’s usually just the noise. Life is loud. Your phone is a slot machine of dopamine, your job is a treadmill, and your brain is a chaotic mess of grocery lists and anxieties. Getting closer to the Divine isn't about adding more noise; it's about finding the frequency that’s already there.
Why Feeling Far Away Is Actually Normal
Most people think spiritual distance is a sign of failure. It's not. Saint John of the Cross famously wrote about the "Dark Night of the Soul," describing a period where God feels utterly absent. If a literal saint felt like God had ghosted him, you’re allowed to feel a bit disconnected too.
The first step in understanding how do I get closer to God is accepting that "feeling" isn't the same thing as "being." You can be inches away from someone in a crowded room and feel miles apart, or you can be across the ocean and feel their presence in your bones. Faith is a muscle, not a mood ring. When the feelings fade, that's actually when the real growth starts happening because you’re forced to move by intention rather than just riding a spiritual high.
Stop Treating Prayer Like a Performance
We’ve been conditioned to think prayer needs to sound like a Shakespearean play or a formal business proposal. It doesn't. If you’re struggling with the "thee" and "thou" or trying to sound holy, you’re just performing for an audience of one who already knows what you’re thinking.
Try "Micro-Prayers."
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Instead of carving out an hour that you don't have, talk to God while you’re doing the dishes. "Hey, I’m stressed about this meeting. Help me not be a jerk." That’s a prayer. It’s real. It’s raw. Brother Lawrence, a 17th-century monk, wrote a whole book called The Practice of the Presence of God based on the idea that he found God just as much in the monastery kitchen scrubbing grease off pots as he did at the altar. He believed that we can maintain a "holy indifference" to our surroundings and stay tethered to the Divine through constant, casual conversation.
The Power of Silence (And Why We Hate It)
Blaise Pascal, the mathematician and philosopher, once said that all of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone. He wasn't wrong. Silence is terrifying because it forces us to face ourselves. But silence is also the "thin place" where the barrier between the physical and the spiritual dissolves.
You don't need a mountain top. You just need to put your phone in another room for ten minutes. Sit. Don't ask for anything. Don't complain. Just exist. It’s in that silence that you start to realize the "distance" was just the static of your own busy mind.
Reading the Text Without the Filter
If you’re looking into how do I get closer to God, you’ve probably been told to "read your Bible" (or Torah, or Quran, depending on your path). But let’s be real—sometimes it’s boring. Or confusing. Or it feels like ancient history that has zero to do with your Tuesday morning.
Try reading for resonance rather than for "completion."
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Instead of trying to finish a chapter, find one verse. Chew on it. This is an ancient practice called Lectio Divina. You read a small passage, you meditate on it, you pray over it, and you just sit with it. It’s the difference between scarfing down a fast-food burger and savoring a five-course meal. If a verse about "peace that passes understanding" hits you, stay there. Don't move on just because the reading plan says you have to get through Leviticus.
The Physicality of Faith
We are not just floating brains. We are physical creatures. Sometimes the best way to get closer to God is to move your body.
- Service: Get out of your own head by helping someone else. Volunteer at a shelter. Mow your neighbor's lawn. When you act as the "hands and feet" of the Divine, you often find the heart of the Divine.
- Nature: There is a reason why every major spiritual figure in history went into the wilderness. Nature is the "First Bible." It reflects the character of the Creator without the baggage of human dogma. A hike isn't just exercise; it's a sensory encounter with something bigger than yourself.
- Fasting: This isn't just about food. It's about clearing space. Fast from social media. Fast from complaining. Fast from the need to be right. When you create a vacuum in your life, the Spirit tends to fill it.
Community Is a Mess, But It’s Necessary
There’s a trend of "I’m spiritual but not religious," and I get it. Religion has a lot of baggage. People are flawed, churches can be toxic, and the politics are exhausting. But trying to get closer to God in total isolation is like trying to learn a language without anyone to speak to.
You need "iron sharpening iron."
Find a group of people who are also asking how do I get closer to God. Not a group that claims to have all the answers, but a group that is comfortable with the questions. Spiritual growth happens in the friction of community. It happens when you have to forgive someone, when you have to be patient with someone’s annoying habits, and when someone carries you because you’re too tired to walk.
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Dealing with the "Wall"
At some point, you will hit a wall. You’re doing the things—you’re praying, you’re reading, you’re being a decent human—and still, nothing. Crickets.
This is often where people give up. They think the "relationship" is over. But in any long-term relationship—marriage, deep friendship—there are seasons of mundanity. There are seasons where you just coexist. If you only seek God for the "experience," you’re chasing a feeling, not a Person.
Push through the boredom. The wall is there to test if you want God, or if you just want the good feelings that come with God.
Actionable Next Steps to Narrow the Gap
- Audit your "Inputs": Spend the next 24 hours noticing what fills your mind. If it’s 90% outrage-news and 10% God, the math for closeness isn't in your favor. Swap one podcast for a guided meditation or just silence.
- The "Three-Sentence Prayer": Every morning this week, before you check your email, say three sentences to God. One of thanks, one of honesty (even if it's "I don't feel like doing this today"), and one of surrender.
- Identify your "Thin Place": Find a physical location where you feel most at peace. Maybe it’s a specific park bench, a corner of your bedroom, or even your car. Go there once a week specifically to be still.
- Practice Radical Honesty: Stop "polishing" your prayers. If you’re angry at God, say it. If you’re doubting, admit it. The Divine can handle your honesty; what He can't work with is your facade.
- Look for the "God-Winks": Throughout your day, look for tiny coincidences or moments of beauty. Start a note on your phone to track them. It trains your brain to look for the Divine in the mundane.
Getting closer to God isn't a destination you arrive at; it's a rhythm you live into. It’s less about "finding" something lost and more about realizing you were never actually alone in the first place. You've just been holding your breath; it's time to start exhaling.