Men don't really talk about it. Usually, sex ed focuses on "the deed" with a partner or the solo act in a locked bathroom, but there’s this massive middle ground that’s been part of male bonding and sexual exploration for literally forever. Guys jacking off together—often called circle jerks, mutual masturbation, or just "manning up" in certain subcultures—is a practice that crosses lines of orientation, age, and social status. It’s a thing. It’s also something that carries a weirdly heavy weight of stigma, even though it's basically the lowest-risk sexual activity you can engage in.
Honestly, if you look at the history of male spaces, from ancient Greek gymnasiums to Victorian boarding schools, the idea of men being sexual in each other's presence wasn't always viewed through the hyper-rigid lens of modern identity. Today, we’re obsessed with labels. Back then? It was often just what happened when guys were bored, horny, and around each other.
The Psychology Behind Why Guys Do It
Sexuality is a spectrum. We know this. But even for guys who identify as 100% straight, there’s a biological and social curiosity that doesn't just vanish because society says it should. Dr. Jane Ward, a professor and author of Not Gay: Sex between Straight White Men, has spent years researching why men who don't identify as queer still engage in sexual acts with other men. She found that for many, jacking off together is about a specific kind of male-centric intimacy that doesn't necessarily "threaten" their heterosexuality. It’s about the vibe. It’s about the shared experience.
Some guys do it for the performance. There’s a certain ego boost in being seen and seeing others. It’s visual. It’s loud. It’s high-energy. For others, it’s purely about the physical release in a setting that feels "safe" because there’s no pressure to perform for a woman or navigate the complexities of a romantic relationship.
Then there’s the bonding aspect. It sounds "bro-y," but there is a legitimate release of oxytocin during any shared sexual experience. When you're in a room with other men, stripped of the usual posturing and "tough guy" personas, a different kind of connection happens. It’s raw. It’s vulnerable. You’re literally seeing each other at your most basic, animalistic level.
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Health and Safety: The Low-Risk Reality
Let’s talk shop. In a world where we’re constantly worried about STIs, mutual masturbation is incredibly safe. You aren't swapping fluids in a way that typically facilitates the transmission of HIV or Hepatitis C. According to the CDC, the risk of transmission during masturbation—even if you’re in the same room—is negligible to non-existent, provided you aren't sharing toys or engaging in direct skin-to-skin contact with open sores.
It’s the "Sexting" of the physical world.
- Risk Level: Near zero.
- Barriers: Not usually needed unless you’re touching each other.
- Mental Health: Can actually reduce "shame" cycles associated with solo masturbation by normalizing the act.
But safety isn't just about germs. It's about the head-space. Many men find that "circle jerks" or group sessions allow them to explore their bodies without the anxiety of penetration or the "roles" often associated with gay or straight sex. It’s democratic. Everyone is doing the same thing.
Navigating the Stigma and Social Pressure
The elephant in the room is always "does this make me gay?"
Our culture is weirdly obsessed with this. But the truth is, behavior and identity are two different things. You can enjoy the camaraderie of guys jacking off together without it changing who you want to marry or how you live your life. The Kinsey Scale, developed back in the 1940s, already told us that most people fall somewhere in the middle. We've just spent the last eighty years trying to pretend we don't.
If you’re feeling weird about it, you’re not alone. The "post-nut clarity" in a group setting can be intense. One minute it’s all cheers and energy, and the next, everyone is looking at the floor while they pull their pants up. This "shame spiral" is a direct result of social conditioning. Breaking that involves realizing that sexual energy doesn't always have to be a big, dramatic statement about your soul. Sometimes, it’s just fun.
The Logistics of Group Sessions
How does this even happen? In 2026, it’s mostly through apps or specific "jackoff clubs" (JO clubs) that exist in major cities like New York, London, and Berlin. These aren't always dark, seedy basements. Often, they’re organized meetups in private homes or rented studios where the rules are clear: no touch, or touch allowed, depending on the "theme" of the night.
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Communication is everything. If you find yourself in a situation with friends or acquaintances, the vibe usually shifts naturally. It starts with a joke, a video, or just a shared sense of horniness. But "consent" isn't just a word for the bedroom; it applies here too. Checking in with a simple "you guys into this?" can save a lot of awkwardness later.
What to Expect at a JO Party
Most organized events have a "look but don't touch" policy unless stated otherwise. You walk in, you undress (or stay in your underwear), and you find a spot. Some guys are "exhibitionists"—they want everyone to watch. Others are "voyeurs"—they just want to observe the room while they do their own thing. There’s a rhythm to it. The energy builds, peaks, and then—silence.
Digital vs. Physical: The Webcam Revolution
We can't talk about guys jacking off together without mentioning the internet. Discord servers, Zoom rooms, and specialized sites like "BateWorld" have moved this from the shadows into the digital light. For a lot of guys, this is the perfect entry point. You get the visual stimulation and the "group" feeling without the physical vulnerability of being in a room with strangers.
It’s also safer for those in rural areas or conservative environments. You can be part of a community without risking your reputation or safety. The downside? You lose the tactile energy—the smell, the heat, the sound of the room. Digital is great, but it’s a different beast entirely.
Moving Past the Shame
If you’ve done it and you’re feeling "off" about it, stop. Take a breath. You haven't broken any laws of nature. You haven't betrayed your identity. You’ve simply participated in an age-old human behavior. The discomfort you feel is usually just the "programming" of a society that is terrified of male vulnerability.
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Think about it: we celebrate men hitting each other in sports, we celebrate men going to war together, but the moment two men find pleasure in each other’s presence without it being "productive," society loses its mind. That’s a "them" problem, not a "you" problem.
Actionable Steps for Exploring Safely
If you’re curious about exploring mutual masturbation or joining a group, don't just dive into the deep end without a plan. Start by checking out online communities to get a feel for the "etiquette." Most of these spaces have very specific rules about behavior and respect.
- Audit your boundaries. Decide before you go into any situation what you are and aren't okay with. Is touching okay? Do you want to be watched?
- Find a reputable "JO Club." Look for spaces that emphasize consent and have a vetting process for members.
- Communicate with your partner. If you’re in a relationship, be honest. Some partners think it’s hot; others see it as cheating. Know where your relationship stands before you head out.
- Hydrate and Prep. It sounds silly, but these sessions can be high-energy and last for hours. Treat it like a workout.
The world is changing. The binary of "straight" and "gay" is softening into something more honest and fluid. Whether it’s a one-time curiosity or a regular part of your social life, guys jacking off together is just another way men connect. No more, no less.