Memes are a weird currency. One day you're looking at a picture of a cat, and the next, you're trying to figure out why a lethal alien symbiote is giving a grammar lesson to Spider-Man. If you’ve spent any time on Marvel Twitter, Reddit, or TikTok lately, you’ve definitely seen it: the image of Venom—usually looking aggressive and looming—shouting at a confused Peter Parker.
The caption? For the last time Parker our pronouns are they them.
It’s hilarious. It’s snappy. It also happens to be a masterclass in how internet humor takes a real-world concept (gender identity) and flips it into a joke about literal comic book biology. But where did this actually come from? And why has it become such a permanent fixture in the Spidey fandom?
The punchline that took over the internet
Honestly, the joke is pretty simple once you get the "logic" behind it. In the Marvel universe, Venom isn't just one guy. He’s the combination of a human host—usually Eddie Brock—and an alien Klyntar symbiote.
Because they are two distinct consciousnesses sharing one massive, toothy body, they almost always refer to themselves as "We." The meme takes this literal plurality and mashes it up with modern conversations about non-binary and gender-neutral pronouns. In the most famous version of the joke, the punchline goes: "For the last time, Parker, our pronouns are they/them! Not because we’re non-binary, but because we are literally two guys!"
(Or, depending on which corner of the internet you’re in, the ending gets significantly more "colorful.")
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Why it actually makes sense (sorta)
In the comics, the symbiote doesn't really have a gender in the human sense. It’s an amorphous blob from space. When it bonds with Eddie, they become a collective. Referring to Venom as "him" is technically a bit of a misnomer in the eyes of the symbiote.
You’ve probably noticed that in the Tom Hardy movies, Venom gets very offended if he’s treated like a mere "parasite" or a piece of equipment. He wants his agency recognized. So, the idea of Venom demanding correct pronoun usage—even if for biological plurality rather than gender identity—actually feels strangely "in character" for the big guy.
Where did the meme start?
Tracking the "first" instance of a meme is like trying to find a specific needle in a haystack made of other needles. However, the surge of this specific "they/them" joke really hit its stride around 2021 and 2022.
It likely grew out of the "Pronoun Police" trope of memes, where characters are edited to be unexpectedly progressive or aggressive about social justice. But unlike some memes that punch down, the Venom version stayed popular because it’s a "logic" joke. It’s a "Well, actually..." that ends in a hilarious visual of a monster being a stickler for linguistics.
The Doc Ock variation
Interestingly, there’s a secondary version of this that involves Doctor Octopus. In Spider-Man: No Way Home, there’s a lot of "Hello, Peter" energy going around. Fans started applying the same pronoun logic to Otto Octavius because of his four mechanical arms.
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Is he "he/him"? Or is he "they/them" because the arms have their own (often malevolent) artificial intelligence?
The "literally two people" argument
The genius of the for the last time Parker our pronouns are they them meme is that it bridges a gap.
For some people, it’s just a funny observation about Venom’s "we" gimmick. For others, it’s a way to play with the concept of plurality in a way that feels inclusive but also inherently "comic book-y."
- Eddie Brock: He/Him
- Symbiote: It/They
- Venom: We/Us/They
When Peter Parker calls Venom "he" in the heat of a fight, the meme imagines the symbiote stopping the entire battle just to correct the grammar. It’s that contrast between the "Lethal Protector" and a polite (if loud) HR representative that makes the bit work.
Breaking down the "fandom" impact
This meme has actually sparked some semi-serious discussions in the Marvel community about how we categorize alien life.
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Think about it. We’ve seen Venom bond with Anne Weying (becoming She-Venom). We’ve seen the symbiote have "offspring" like Carnage. Gender is a very loose concept for a sentient liquid.
While the meme is played for laughs, it highlights a reality of the character: Venom is the ultimate "them." They are a relationship, a partnership, and a singular entity all at once. If you’ve ever been in a long-term relationship where you start saying "we" for everything ("We love that restaurant!"), you’re basically halfway to being a symbiote host anyway.
What most people get wrong about the joke
There’s a common misconception that the meme is making fun of people who use they/them pronouns. While the internet can be a toxic place, the "Parker" meme usually functions as a subversion.
The humor doesn't come from "pronouns are weird." The humor comes from "Venom is a literal collective of multiple beings, so the plural 'they' is actually the most scientifically accurate way to address the monster currently trying to eat your brains."
It’s a literalist joke. It’s the same energy as the meme where someone says, "I'm not a girl, I'm a swarm of bees."
Actionable Takeaways for Spidey Fans
If you’re going to use the meme or engage with the fandom, here’s how to do it without looking like a "noob":
- Know your history: Remember that the "We are Venom" line dates back to the character's first full appearance in The Amazing Spider-Man #299.
- Vary the host: The joke works for Eddie Brock, but it’s extra spicy if you apply it to Flash Thompson’s "Agent Venom" or the more recent "King in Black" storylines.
- Check the context: In 2026, the meme has evolved. You'll see variations involving the Spider-Verse (where "we" could mean an infinite number of Spider-people).
- Respect the "We": If you're writing fanfic or roleplaying, using "we" for Venom isn't just a meme—it's the only way to stay true to the source material.
Next time you see a giant black alien yelling about pronouns, you'll know exactly why Peter Parker looks so stressed out. It's not just the sharp teeth; it's the crushing weight of biological accuracy.