Female Ejaculation: Why How to Make a Lady Squirt Is Often Misunderstood

Female Ejaculation: Why How to Make a Lady Squirt Is Often Misunderstood

Let’s be real for a second. If you’ve spent any time on the more "adult" corners of the internet, you’ve probably seen what looks like a fire hydrant going off. It’s dramatic. It’s messy. It’s often used as the ultimate gold medal of sexual performance. But here’s the thing: real life isn’t a produced film, and figuring out how to make a lady squirt is less about "hacking" a body and more about understanding some pretty cool, often-ignored biology.

Most people get this totally wrong. They think it's a button you press. It isn't.

Actually, female ejaculation—which is the technical term we’re looking at here—is something that’s been debated in medical circles for decades. Aristotle wrote about it. Galen talked about it. Yet, even in 2026, people are still confused about what’s actually happening. Is it pee? Is it some secret elixir? Science leans toward a mix, but the experience is 100% real.

The Biology of the Skene’s Glands

To understand the mechanics, we have to talk about the Skene’s glands. These are often called the "female prostate" because, honestly, they are homologous to the male prostate. They sit near the lower end of the urethra. When a person with a vagina gets aroused, these glands can fill with fluid.

Researcher Dr. Beverly Whipple, who basically put the G-spot on the map in the early 80s, noted that this fluid is chemically different from urine. It often contains prostatic acid phosphatase (PAP) and glucose. However, a 2014 study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine used ultrasound scans and found that the bladder often fills and then empties during the process, meaning the fluid is frequently a mix of those glandular secretions and urea.

It’s a combo platter.

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Some people feel a sudden, intense "urge to go" right before it happens. This is the biggest hurdle. Most women pull back at that moment because they’re terrified they’re about to have an accident on the sheets. If you want to facilitate this, the environment has to be "mess-friendly." Throw down some towels. Use a waterproof blanket. If she's worried about the laundry, her brain won't let her body let go.

Why Tension Is the Enemy of Pleasure

You can't force this. Period.

If you go into a sexual encounter with the goal of "making it happen," you’ve already failed. That kind of pressure creates cortisol. Cortisol kills arousal. To get to the point of ejaculation, the body needs to be in a state of high-level parasympathetic arousal, which basically means she needs to be incredibly relaxed and incredibly turned on at the same time.

It’s a weird paradox.

Think of it like trying to fall asleep. The harder you try, the more awake you stay. The same logic applies here. Most women who experience this regularly report that it happens when they stop caring about the outcome and just sink into the sensation.

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The Role of G-Spot Stimulation

While every body is a unique map, the G-spot (or the urethral sponge) is usually the star of the show. This isn't a "spot" like a literal freckle; it’s an area of spongy tissue on the anterior wall of the vagina. If you’re using your fingers, the "come hither" motion is the classic move for a reason.

  • Steady pressure: It’s not about speed. It’s about firm, consistent rhythm.
  • The Hook: Curving the fingers upward toward the belly button.
  • Hydration: This is a big one. You can't expel fluid if you're dehydrated. It sounds simple, but drinking water throughout the day actually matters here.

Sometimes, it’s about the combination. Clitoral stimulation is usually the primary driver of the orgasm itself, while the internal G-spot work provides the "fullness" and the physical trigger for the Skene’s glands to release.

Mental Blocks and the "Pee" Myth

We have to address the shame factor. Society spends a lot of time telling women to be "clean" and "composed." Squirt is neither of those things. It’s chaotic.

A lot of women have a reflex to tighten their pelvic floor muscles when they feel that rush of fluid. This is a learned behavior from potty training. To move past it, there needs to be a lot of vocal encouragement. Telling her "it's okay" or "just let it go" can be the literal key that unlocks the physical response.

Honestly, the "is it pee?" debate is kind of boring compared to the actual experience. Even if there is some urea involved, the physiological release and the accompanying orgasm are often described as much more intense and "full-body" than a standard clitoral orgasm.

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It's Not a Performance Metric

One of the most damaging things to hit modern intimacy is the idea that if she doesn't squirt, the sex wasn't "good enough." That’s nonsense.

Only a certain percentage of women—estimates vary wildly from 10% to 50% depending on the study—actually experience this. Some women have the Skene’s glands but they don't produce much fluid. Others might have a different anatomical layout.

If you make how to make a lady squirt the only goal, you’re ignoring 99% of the other incredible sensations she could be having. It should be a fun side quest, not the main mission.

Practical Steps for Your Next Session

If you’re both on board to explore this, stop watching the clock.

  1. Warm up for 20 minutes. Seriously. Don't even touch the G-spot until she’s already had at least one "regular" orgasm or is very close to it. The tissues need to be engorged with blood.
  2. Use plenty of lube. Friction is the enemy of sustained internal stimulation. Even if she seems "wet enough," use more. It reduces the risk of irritation.
  3. Communication. Ask her how the pressure feels. "More?" "Softer?" "Faster?"
  4. The Towel Method. Put two heavy beach towels down. It removes the subconscious "Oh no, the mattress" anxiety.
  5. Empty the bladder? Maybe not. Some experts suggest having a semi-full bladder helps because it provides more internal "push-back" for the fingers to hit the G-spot, but others find it too distracting. Experiment with both.

Focus on the "upward" motion. If you're using a toy, look for something with a curved head designed specifically for G-spot targeting. Be patient. Sometimes the fluid doesn't come out in a spray; sometimes it’s just a heavy flow that pools. Both are perfectly "correct."

The most important thing to remember is that every person’s body reacts differently to stimulus. What works for one person might do absolutely nothing for another. This isn't a failure of technique; it’s just human diversity.

Actionable Takeaways for Exploration

  • Prioritize Relaxation: Start with a massage or a bath to lower the heart rate and get into a "receptive" headspace.
  • Master the Rhythmic Pressure: Use two fingers in a "come hither" motion, focusing on the front wall of the vagina, about two inches in.
  • Encourage Letting Go: Use verbal cues to reassure her that any "mess" is welcome and that she shouldn't try to hold back the urge to urinate.
  • Hydrate Together: Drink a large glass of water an hour before you plan on getting intimate.
  • Remove the Goal: If it happens, cool. If it doesn't, and she still has a great time, that's a win.

Intimacy is about the connection, not the fluid volume. Explore the sensations for what they are, and you'll likely find that the best experiences happen when you're both just present in the moment.