Female Ejaculation: What’s Actually Happening and Why It’s Still So Controversial

Female Ejaculation: What’s Actually Happening and Why It’s Still So Controversial

If you’ve spent any time on the internet lately, you’ve probably seen the debates. One side claims it’s just urine. The other insists it’s a distinct physiological phenomenon. Honestly, the confusion around female ejaculation is kind of wild considering we’ve known about it for centuries. It’s not a "trend" or a performance for the camera. It’s a real biological process, even if the science behind it has been frustratingly slow to catch up with lived experience.

The reality is nuanced. It's messy. It’s also perfectly normal.

Historically, Western medicine has a habit of ignoring things it can’t easily categorize. Galen, a Greek physician back in the second century, actually wrote about a "female semen." Fast forward a couple of thousand years, and we’re still arguing over what’s in the fluid. But for most people, the question isn’t about ancient history—it’s about what is happening in the body right now.

What is Female Ejaculation, Really?

Basically, it’s the expulsion of fluid from the urethra during or before an orgasm. But here’s where it gets tricky: there are actually two different things people are usually talking about when they use this term.

First, there’s true female ejaculation. This is usually a small amount of thick, milky-white fluid. It comes from the Skene’s glands, which are often called the "female prostate." These glands are located near the lower end of the urethra.

Then there’s "squirting." This is usually a much larger volume of clear fluid.

Science is still hashing this out. A 2014 study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine used ultrasound scans on women who reported being able to squirt. The researchers found that the bladder filled up before the activity and was empty afterward. Does that mean it’s just pee? Not necessarily. Chemical analysis often shows that while this fluid contains urea and creatinine (stuff found in urine), it also contains prostatic-specific antigen (PSA), which isn’t typically in your morning bathroom break.

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It’s a cocktail.

The Skene’s Glands: The Unsung Heroes

You can’t talk about this without mentioning the Skene’s glands. Named after Alexander Skene, who described them in the late 1800s, these tiny structures are located on the anterior wall of the vagina. They are homologous to the male prostate.

This is huge.

It means the female body has the same "machinery" for producing specialized fluid as the male body. When people get technical, they’re usually looking for markers like acid phosphatase. When these markers show up in the fluid, it proves the Skene’s glands are doing the heavy lifting.

Some people have very active Skene's glands. Some don't. It’s a lot like how some people have high metabolisms and others don't—it’s just biological variance. There is no "right" way for a body to respond to arousal.

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Why the "It’s Just Urine" Argument Fails

Look, if it were only urine, the chemistry would match perfectly. It doesn't.

When researchers like Dr. Florian Wimpissinger have looked at this, they’ve found that the biochemical makeup of the ejaculate is distinct. It often has higher concentrations of glucose and lower concentrations of creatinine than standard urine.

Is there crossover? Often. During intense arousal, the bladder can contract. The urethral sphincter might relax. A bit of urine might mix with the Skene's gland fluid. But calling the whole experience "incontinence" is like calling a gourmet soup "hot water" just because water is the base. It misses the point of the complexity.

The Psychological Barrier

For a lot of women, the first time this happens is terrifying.

You’re in the middle of a great moment, and suddenly, you feel a "pop" or a rush of fluid. The immediate thought is often, Oh no, I just peed the bed. That shame is a mood killer. It’s rooted in a culture that treats female bodies as things that should be dry, scented, and contained.

The porn industry hasn't helped much either. "Squirting" videos are often highly stylized and sometimes even faked with external water sources, which creates this weird pressure. Real-life ejaculation isn't always a geyser. Sometimes it's a trickle. Sometimes it’s a few drops.

How to Actually Experience It (If You Want To)

First off, you don't have to do this. It’s not an "achievement unlocked" in the world of sex. But if you're curious about the mechanics, it usually comes down to G-spot stimulation.

Since the Skene’s glands are located right around that area, pressure there is the trigger.

  • Focus on the front wall: About one to two inches inside the vagina, on the side toward the belly button.
  • The "come hither" motion: Using fingers in a firm, repetitive motion against that wall is the most common way to stimulate the area.
  • Relaxation is non-negotiable: You can’t force this. If the body is tense because you're overthinking the result, the urethral muscles will likely stay clamped shut.
  • The urge to go: Many people report feeling like they need to urinate right before it happens. This is the "point of no return." Learning to lean into that sensation instead of pulling away out of fear is usually the key.

It’s worth noting that some people will never ejaculate, no matter how much they try. And that’s fine. Anatomical differences in the size and "plumbing" of the Skene’s glands mean some people simply don’t produce much fluid.

Myths That Need to Die

  1. It’s a sign of a "superior" orgasm. Nope. An orgasm is a neurological and muscular event. Ejaculation is a glandular event. You can have one without the other.
  2. Every woman can do it. We don't know this for sure. Some studies suggest the Skene’s glands are vestigial or highly varied in size across the population.
  3. It’s always messy. Sometimes, sure. Throw down a towel. But it’s not always a flood.

The medical community is slowly getting its act together. For years, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) basically ignored female sexual response or pathologized it. We are finally moving into an era where we can talk about female ejaculation without people giggling or getting grossed out.

Actionable Steps for Better Sexual Health

If you want to explore this or just understand your body better, here is how to move forward without the stress.

Ditch the shame. If you experience fluid during sex, stop apologizing for it. It’s a sign of high arousal and a functioning glandular system. It is not an "accident."

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Invest in a waterproof blanket. Honestly, the biggest hurdle for most people is the fear of ruining a mattress. Take the "mess" variable out of the equation. Brands like Jussies or even simple "sex towels" can make the experience much more relaxed.

Map your own anatomy. Everyone’s G-spot and Skene’s glands are situated slightly differently. Take time with solo play to figure out what pressure feels like "fullness" and what feels like "pleasure."

Talk to your partner. If you're worried about their reaction, bring it up outside the bedroom first. Explain that it’s a natural physiological response. Most partners are actually pretty enthusiastic about it once they understand what it is.

Stay hydrated. If you're dehydrated, your body isn't going to produce much of anything. Plus, it makes the chemistry of any fluid (including the stuff from your Skene's glands) less concentrated and more comfortable.

The bottom line? Your body is an incredibly complex system of glands, nerves, and muscles. Whether you ejaculate or not has zero bearing on your worth or your "skill" in bed. It's just one of the many ways the human body can react to pleasure. Embrace the biology, ignore the stigma, and keep exploring.