Sex isn't a performance. It's not a movie. But because of the internet, a lot of us feel this weird pressure to produce a "grand finale." Specifically, everyone wants to know how to make a pussy squirt. It's become this holy grail of the bedroom, a physical proof of a job well done.
Honestly? It's often misunderstood.
Squirting, or female ejaculation, isn't some mythical superpower. It's a biological response that involves the Skene’s glands and the urethra. For some, it happens easily. For others, it takes specific types of stimulation, a lot of relaxation, and a total lack of performance anxiety. If you’re trying too hard, you’re probably moving in the wrong direction. Tension is the enemy of the gush.
The Science of the Fluid (It’s Not Just Urine)
Let’s get the "is it pee?" question out of the way.
Researchers like Dr. Samuel Salama have studied this extensively. In a 2014 study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine, researchers used ultrasounds to watch the bladder during sexual stimulation. They found that while the fluid does pass through the urethra, it’s not exactly the same as a mid-day bathroom break. It’s often a mix of urea, creatinine, and uric acid in low concentrations, combined with prostatic acid phosphatase (PAP)—an enzyme also found in male semen.
Basically, the Skene's glands (the female prostate) contribute the "magic" ingredients. These glands sit near the G-spot. When they get engorged and stimulated, they release fluid. Sometimes it’s a thick, milky white substance. Other times, it’s a larger volume of clear fluid.
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Biology is messy.
If you’re worried about the bedsheets, just lay down a towel. You can’t reach the peak of pleasure if you’re subconsciously worried about ruining an expensive mattress. That mental block acts like a physical dam.
Location Matters: Finding the G-Spot
You can’t learn how to make a pussy squirt if you’re just poking around aimlessly. The target is the G-spot, or the Grafenberg spot.
It’s not a "button." Think of it more as a patch of spongy tissue located about one to two inches inside the vagina on the front wall (the side toward the belly button). When a person is aroused, this area swells. It feels different than the rest of the vaginal canal—more textured, like a walnut or the roof of your mouth.
The Technique
Use the "come hither" motion. Two fingers, palm up, curving toward the navel.
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Don't just tap it. You need a rhythmic, firm pressure. Start slow to build the blood flow. Once the area is sensitive and swollen, you can increase the speed. But here is the secret: keep your other hand busy. The clitoris is the powerhouse of the female orgasm. While you’re focusing on the internal G-spot, provide external clitoral stimulation. This "sandwich" of pleasure is what usually triggers the ejaculatory response.
Why Relaxation is the Secret Weapon
Most people fail at this because they’re too intense. They’re "hunting" for the squirt.
When a woman is close to ejaculating, it often feels like she has to pee. This is a massive hurdle. The brain sends a signal: Stop, you're about to have an accident. To actually squirt, she has to push through that feeling. She has to lean into the sensation of "letting go" instead of tensing up to hold it in.
Communication is everything here.
Talk about it. Assure her that a mess is fine. If she’s tensing her pelvic floor muscles (the PC muscles), the fluid won't release. Encourage her to breathe deeply. Long, slow exhales help relax the pelvic floor. It’s a paradox—you need the physical stimulation to be high, but the mental state to be completely surrendered.
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Different Bodies, Different Results
It's important to be real: not everyone can or will squirt.
Dr. Beverly Whipple, one of the researchers who popularized the term G-spot, has noted that physiological differences in the Skene’s glands play a huge role. Some people have more developed glands; others have very little glandular tissue there at all.
That doesn't mean the sex is bad.
If you’re chasing a squirt and ignoring the actual pleasure of your partner, you’re failing at sex. The goal should always be an incredible experience, not a specific volume of fluid. Some of the most intense orgasms are "dry," and some squirts happen during relatively mild peaks. There isn't a 1:1 correlation between the amount of fluid and the quality of the climax.
Advanced Positions to Try
Some positions make it easier to hit the front vaginal wall.
- Doggy Style (with a tilt): If she leans down on her elbows, it changes the angle of the vaginal canal, making the G-spot more accessible for deep, rhythmic friction.
- Woman on Top (leaning back): This allows her to control the depth and the angle. By leaning back and using her hands for clitoral support, she can grind against the pubic bone, which puts direct pressure on the Skene's glands.
- The Coital Alignment Technique (CAT): This is a variation of missionary where the partner moves higher up, creating a grinding motion rather than a thrusting one. It’s all about steady pressure.
Actionable Steps for Your Next Session
If you want to try this tonight, don't make it a "project." Make it an exploration.
- Hydrate. You can't expel fluid if you're dehydrated. It sounds simple, but it matters.
- Extended Foreplay. You need the G-spot to be fully engorged. This takes time—at least 20 minutes of general arousal before focusing on the "spot."
- The "Push." When the sensation becomes intense and feels like a "fullness" or a need to urinate, encourage her to bear down slightly, as if she’s trying to push the fluid out.
- Vary the Rhythm. Don't just stay at one speed. Switch between fast, fluttering movements and deep, heavy pressure.
- Use Lube. Even if she’s naturally wet, extra lubrication prevents the skin from getting irritated during the repetitive motion required for a G-spot orgasm.
Focus on the build-up. Focus on the breathing. If the squirt happens, great. If it doesn't, and you both end up exhausted and shaking from a "normal" orgasm, that’s a win too. The best sex happens when you stop trying to follow a script and start paying attention to the person in front of you.