It starts with a mirror. For many children, looking into one is a simple act of checking for a messy face or a loose tooth. But for others, it's where the first seeds of "difference" are sown. Eyes That Kiss in the Corners, written by Joanna Ho and illustrated by Dung Ho, isn't just a bedtime story. It’s a manifesto. It’s a lyrical, soaring reclamation of a facial feature that has, for decades, been used as a tool for mockery.
When Joanna Ho released this book in 2021, she wasn't just trying to sell copies. She was answering a void. I’ve spent a lot of time looking at how children’s literature handles race, and honestly, we spent way too many years in the "colorblind" era. We told kids that everyone is the same. That's a lie. We aren't the same. Our eyes are different. Our heritages are different. And pretending those differences don't exist actually does more harm than good.
This book focuses on a young Asian girl who realizes her eyes look different from her peers'. They don't have the big, round, double-eyelid look of the Disney princesses she sees on TV. Instead, her eyes "kiss in the corners and glow like warm tea." It’s a gorgeous metaphor. It turns a physical trait—the epicanthic fold—into a bridge across generations.
The Cultural Weight of the Monolid
Let’s get technical for a second. The "kiss" the book describes refers to the epicanthic fold, a skin fold of the upper eyelid that covers the inner corner of the eye. In Western beauty standards, this has often been viewed as something to "fix." Blepharoplasty, or double-eyelid surgery, remains one of the most common cosmetic procedures in East and Southeast Asian communities.
Why? Because the world spent a century telling people that "beautiful" meant "wide-open."
Joanna Ho flips the script. In the book, the protagonist sees her eyes reflected in her mother, her grandmother (Amah), and her little sister. It’s a lineage. When she looks at her Amah, she doesn't see "aged eyes." She sees eyes that have seen history, eyes that "tell stories that stretch back to the beginning of time." This isn't just fluff. It's a psychological tool called mirrors and windows, a concept popularized by Dr. Rudine Sims Bishop. Children need mirrors to see themselves and windows to see others. For Asian American kids, Eyes That Kiss in the Corners is one of the brightest mirrors ever polished.
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Why the Poetry in This Book Actually Matters
The prose is dense. It’s rich. Usually, picture books are sparse, but Ho uses words like "guiding stars" and "crescent moons." This matters because it counters the "othering" of Asian features. Think about it. For a long time, if Asian eyes were mentioned in Western media, it was through the lens of caricature. The "slant-eye" gesture is a trauma many Asian kids carry from the playground.
By using high-art language to describe these features, Ho performs a kind of linguistic exorcism. She takes the shame out and puts the wonder in.
I remember talking to an educator about this book, and she mentioned that the "tea" metaphor—"glow like warm tea"—was the first time her students had heard their eye color described as something desirable rather than just "dark." It's about the nuance. It’s about the fact that the girl’s eyes are "filled with so many stories that they overflow."
The Dung Ho Factor
We can't talk about this book without talking about the art. Dung Ho (no relation to the author) uses a color palette that feels like a sunset. It’s gold, deep blues, and vibrant pinks. There is a specific spread in the book where the eyes of the women in the family are layered with traditional Chinese motifs—dragons, phoenixes, and lotus flowers.
It connects biology to mythology.
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- It shows that the shape of an eye isn't just a random genetic quirk.
- It links the physical body to a cultural soul.
- It validates the child's place in a long, unbroken chain of ancestors.
Dealing with the "Difference" Conversation
Some parents ask: "Does pointing out the difference make it a problem?"
Basically, no. Kids aren't blind. They notice differences by the age of three. If we don't give them the vocabulary to describe those differences with love, they will inherit the vocabulary of the world, which is often rooted in bias. Eyes That Kiss in the Corners provides that vocabulary. It’s a preemptive strike against bullying.
It’s also an important book for kids who don't have eyes that kiss in the corners. It builds empathy. It teaches them that beauty isn't a monolith. If a child grows up only seeing one type of eye as "pretty," they will naturally view everything else as "less than." Reading this book in a diverse classroom shifts the baseline of what "normal" looks like.
Beyond the Book: The Movement of Self-Love
Since the book’s release, it has spawned a sequel, Eyes that Speak to the Stars, focusing on a young boy’s perspective. This is crucial because Asian masculinity is often sidelined in conversations about beauty and identity.
The "Eyes That Kiss" series has become a staple in "Social Emotional Learning" (SEL) curricula. But honestly, calling it "curriculum" makes it sound boring. It’s a heartbeat. It’s the sound of a million kids finally feeling like they don't have to squint to fit into a Western frame.
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What People Get Wrong
People often think this is a "sad" book. Or a book about "overcoming" being Asian.
That is totally wrong.
It’s a celebratory book. There is no trauma in these pages. There is no bully who gets defeated. The "antagonist," if there is one, is just the internal doubt that vanishes when the protagonist looks at the people she loves most. It’s a story of internal strength, not external validation.
Actionable Ways to Use the Themes of the Book
If you’re a parent, educator, or just someone who wants to be a better human, you don't just read the book and put it away. You use it as a springboard.
- The Mirror Exercise: Have children look in the mirror and find one feature they share with an ancestor. Don't let them say "I don't know." Look at old photos. Find the nose, the ears, the smile. This builds a sense of belonging.
- Vocabulary Shift: Instead of using generic terms for beauty, use sensory language. Is hair "ink-black" or "spun gold"? Are eyes "amber pools" or "sparkling obsidian"? Language shapes perception.
- Audit Your Bookshelf: Look at your kids' books. If every character has the same eye shape, you’re giving them a narrow view of the world. Add books like Eyes That Kiss in the Corners, Fry Bread by Kevin Noble Maillard, or Sulwe by Lupita Nyong'o.
- Discuss Genealogy: Use the book to talk about where your family comes from. The protagonist's eyes "stretch back to the beginning of time." Where does your family's story start?
Eyes That Kiss in the Corners reminds us that the way we see ourselves is often a reflection of how our loved ones see us. When the little girl looks at her Amah, she sees a vision of grace. When she looks at her sister, she sees a vision of the future. By the end of the book, when she looks in the mirror, she doesn't just see her eyes. She sees her power. She sees a revolution in the shape of a kiss.
The beauty of this narrative lies in its simplicity. It doesn't try to solve racism in 40 pages. It just tries to make one girl love her reflection. And sometimes, that's exactly where the biggest changes start.
Next Steps for Deepening the Impact
- Create a "Heritage Map": After reading, sit down with your child or student and draw a family tree that focuses on physical traits. Connect your "smile" to Grandma or your "toes" to an uncle. This reinforces the book's message of biological pride.
- Explore the Companion Work: Read Eyes That Speak to the Stars to see how these themes translate to male identity and the connection between the earth and the sky in Chinese culture.
- Support Diverse Authors: Make a conscious effort to buy from independent bookstores that prioritize #OwnVoices stories, ensuring that creators like Joanna Ho can continue to tell these essential stories.