You’re standing in the kitchen, staring at an open fridge, and you whisper, "Where did I put the mustard?" Then you realize your roommate is standing right behind you. It’s awkward. You feel a bit like a "mad scientist" or someone who’s losing their grip. But honestly? You’re just practicing what psychologists call external speech or self-talk.
What is it called when you talk to yourself? In the clinical world, it’s often labeled private speech. Most of us associate it with toddlers playing with blocks, narrating their every move like a sports commentator. But for adults, this verbal processing doesn't just vanish. It goes underground, or sometimes, it stays loud and proud. It’s a cognitive tool, not a symptom of a breakdown.
The Science of Private Speech
We’ve all been there. You’re trying to assemble furniture from a Swedish retailer and the instructions look like ancient hieroglyphics. You start saying the steps out loud. "Okay, the long screw goes into Slot B."
This isn't just noise.
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Researchers like Lev Vygotsky, a giant in developmental psychology, argued that private speech is the bridge between social communication and internal thought. As kids, we talk out loud to regulate our behavior. As we get older, that speech becomes "internalized" into a silent inner monologue. But when tasks get hard? We revert. We bring the words back out into the air because hearing the instructions helps our brain process the information more effectively.
A 2012 study by Gary Lupyan and Daniel Swingley, published in the Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology, found that people looking for specific items (like a bag of apples in a grocery store) found them faster when they spoke the name of the object out loud. It’s like a search engine for your eyeballs. By saying "apple," you’re priming your visual system to recognize the shape and color of an apple more quickly.
It’s basically a performance enhancer for your brain.
Why do we feel so weird about it?
Stigma. That's the short answer. We’ve been conditioned to think that talking to oneself is the first sign of psychosis. While auditory hallucinations—hearing voices that aren't there—are a hallmark of conditions like schizophrenia, self-talk is entirely different. In self-talk, you are the sender and the receiver. You know you’re the one talking.
The Different "Flavors" of Self-Talk
Not all self-talk is created equal. Sometimes it's functional, sometimes it's emotional, and sometimes it's just a habit of the lonely or the highly focused.
Instructional Self-Talk
This is the "Step 1, Step 2" variety. Athletes use this constantly. Think of a tennis player whispering "toss, reach, snap" before a serve. It keeps the motor skills synchronized. If you’re doing this while coding, cooking, or fixing a leaky pipe, you’re using your voice as a cognitive pacer.
Motivational Self-Talk
"You can do this." "Don't give up." It sounds cheesy, like a poster in a middle school hallway, but it works. Research in the journal Perspectives on Psychological Science suggests that talking to yourself in the second person (using "you" instead of "I") is actually more effective for self-regulation. It creates "self-distancing." By saying "You’ve got this, Mike," Mike is treating himself like a coach would, which lowers the emotional stakes and reduces anxiety.
Emotional Venting
Sometimes, the internal pressure cooker just gets too hot. You talk to yourself because the thoughts are too big for your head. This is often where people get worried, especially if the self-talk is negative. But even then, naming the emotion—"I am really frustrated right now"—can dampen the amygdala's response. It’s called affect labeling.
When Self-Talk Becomes a Problem
While "what is it called when you talk to yourself" usually leads to reassuring answers about "private speech," there are nuances. Context is everything.
If the talk is accompanied by:
- Hearing a voice that is distinct from your own.
- Self-harming commands.
- Extreme social withdrawal.
- Disorganized thinking where the words don't make sense (word salad).
Then, yeah, it’s time to chat with a professional. But for the vast majority of us, talking to the cat or narrating our drive home is just a sign of an active, engaged mind.
In fact, some experts suggest that people with high "verbal intelligence" are more likely to engage in frequent self-talk. They have a surplus of linguistic energy. They think in words, so it’s natural those words spill out of their mouths.
The Role of Loneliness vs. Solitude
There’s a difference between talking to yourself because you’re lonely and doing it because you’re alone. In the wake of the 2020 lockdowns, reports of people talking to themselves skyrocketed. Without social mirrors—other people to talk to—the brain starts creating its own feedback loops. It’s a survival mechanism. We are social animals. If we don't have a partner to bounce ideas off of, we become our own partner.
It’s not "crazy." It’s adaptive.
How to Optimize Your Inner (and Outer) Monologue
Since you’re doing it anyway, you might as well do it right. You can actually train your self-talk to be a tool for productivity rather than just a weird quirk you hide from your neighbors.
Shift to the Second Person. Stop saying "I need to focus." Start saying "[Your Name], you need to focus." It sounds bizarre, but the psychological distance helps you view your problems more objectively. It’s the "Fly on the Wall" technique.
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Keep it Positive (or at least Neutral). Negative self-talk is a fast track to burnout. If you catch yourself saying "I'm such an idiot," catch it. Correct it out loud. "No, I just made a mistake on that spreadsheet." Hearing the correction out loud reinforces it more than just thinking it.
Use it for Memory. If you’re prone to forgetting where you put your keys, say it out loud as you drop them. "I am putting my keys on the blue tray." This creates a dual-encoding in the brain—both a visual and an auditory memory trace. It’s much harder to lose things when your brain has a recording of you announcing their location.
Narrate Complex Tasks. When you're overwhelmed, talk through the "micro-steps." This prevents the "freeze" response when a project feels too big. "First, I'm opening the email. Second, I'm downloading the attachment."
The Verdict on Your "Crazy" Habit
So, what is it called when you talk to yourself? It’s called being human. It’s called externalized cognition. It’s a sign that your brain is trying to organize, focus, and soothe itself in a world that is often chaotic and distracting.
The next time you’re caught talking to your reflection or the dashboard of your car, don't blush. You’re just using the most advanced piece of software in the known universe—the human brain—to its full potential.
Next Steps for Better Self-Talk:
- Audit your tone: For one day, pay attention to whether your out-loud comments are mostly "coaching" or "criticizing."
- Practice name-dropping: Try using your own name during a stressful task to see if the "self-distancing" effect helps your focus.
- Normalize the narrative: If you have kids or coworkers, explain that you’re "thinking out loud" to help you solve a problem. It removes the stigma and actually models a healthy cognitive strategy for them.
External speech isn't a glitch. It’s a feature. Use it.