So, let’s be real. When most people heard that Emily Ratajkowski was writing a book of feminist essays, the collective eye-roll was almost audible.
It’s a classic trap. We see a woman who has built a literal empire off her physical form—the "Blurred Lines" video, the bikini selfies, the high-fashion covers—and we assume there’s nothing else going on behind the curtain. We think, Oh, how hard must it be to be that beautiful? But Emily Ratajkowski My Body isn't a collection of "woe is me" stories from a supermodel. It’s actually a pretty brutal, clinical dissection of what it’s like to be a commodity in a world that wants to own you.
If you haven't read it yet, you've probably still seen the headlines. The Robin Thicke stuff. The "Buying Myself Back" essay that went viral in New York Magazine. But there’s a lot more nuance here than the tabloids let on.
The Myth of the "Empowered" Model
One of the biggest things Ratajkowski tackles is this idea of "empowerment" through sex appeal. In her early twenties, she was the poster child for the "my body, my choice" brand of feminism. She thought that by taking her clothes off for a camera, she was the one in charge.
She was wrong.
In the essay "Men Like You," she basically admits that any power she thought she had was actually just a loan from the men who found her attractive. It’s a gut punch. She describes the realization that her "specialness" was entirely dependent on the male gaze. Basically, if they stop looking, the power vanishes. That’s not real autonomy; it’s just playing a game where the rules are written by someone else.
Honestly, the book feels less like a manifesto and more like a crime scene report. She’s looking at her own career and trying to figure out where she was the victim and where she was the accomplice. It's messy.
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That Infamous "Blurred Lines" Incident
You can’t talk about Emily Ratajkowski My Body without mentioning the "Blurred Lines" essay. For years, she defended that video. She called it fun and empowering. But in the book, she finally tells the truth about what happened on set: Robin Thicke allegedly groped her breasts from behind while he was drunk.
She writes about the "heat of humiliation" that flashed through her. But here’s the kicker—she didn’t say anything at the time. She didn't want to be the "difficult" model. She didn't want to ruin her big break.
It’s a perfect example of the "gray area" she explores throughout the collection. It’s not always a black-and-white case of "bad man, good woman." It’s about how the industry forces women to swallow their discomfort in exchange for a paycheck.
Why "Buying Myself Back" Changed the Game
The most famous essay in the book is "Buying Myself Back." It’s about the surreal nightmare of not owning your own face. Ratajkowski recounts trying to buy a print of a photo of herself from a gallery, only to be told she couldn't.
Then there’s the story of Jonathan Leder, a photographer who she alleges assaulted her during a shoot and then later published a book of nudes from that session without her consent. He denied it, of course. But the essay isn't just about the assault; it’s about the legal loophole where a photographer owns the "art," but the woman in the photo owns nothing.
She eventually bought an NFT of a photo of herself standing in front of one of those stolen images. It was a meta-way of reclaiming her image, but she’s the first to admit that most women don't have the money to "buy themselves back" like she did.
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The Complicated Role of "Pretty Privilege"
Let’s talk about the elephant in the room. Ratajkowski is, by any standard, one of the most beautiful women in the world. And she knows it.
Some critics have slammed the book, saying it’s hard to feel bad for someone who has benefited so much from the system she’s critiquing. It’s a fair point. But Ratajkowski isn't asking for pity. She’s analyzing the "cult of beauty" that she was inducted into by her own mother.
She describes how her mom viewed Emily’s beauty as a reflection of her own worth. From the time she was a toddler, she was taught that being "pretty" was her only real currency.
- Beauty as a Tool: She viewed her body as a "tool used to make a living."
- The Dissociation: She often felt separated from her physical self during shoots, like she was just a mannequin.
- The Insecurity: She admits to still being "addicted" to Instagram likes because they validate the only thing she was ever told mattered.
It’s kind of tragic, really. You’ve got a woman who has everything the world tells us to want, and she’s sitting there wondering if anyone actually likes her, or if they just like the way her skin looks in a certain light.
What Most People Get Wrong
The biggest misconception about Emily Ratajkowski My Body is that it’s supposed to be a guide on how to be a feminist. It’s not.
Ratajkowski doesn't have the answers. She’s still posting the bikini photos. She’s still working in the industry. She’s still participating in the very system she deconstructs. Some people find that hypocritical. I think it’s just honest.
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She isn't saying, "I’ve figured it out and I’m leaving." She’s saying, "I’m stuck in this house, and I’ve decided to start peeling back the wallpaper to see how the walls were built."
Actionable Insights from the Book
If you're looking for what to actually do with the information in these essays, it’s not about boycotting Instagram or burning your makeup. It’s more about internal awareness.
- Audit your consumption: Next time you see a "perfect" image, think about who owns it. Who made money off it? Was the woman in the photo actually comfortable?
- Recognize the "Specialness" Trap: Ratajkowski warns against conflating beauty with love. If you find yourself thinking you’re only valuable when you look a certain way, that’s the "trap" she spent 200 pages describing.
- Understand Consent Beyond "Yes/No": The book is a masterclass in the "gray area." Pressure, power imbalances, and the fear of losing a job are all forms of coercion that we often ignore.
Ultimately, Emily Ratajkowski My Body is a book for anyone who has ever looked in the mirror and felt like they were looking at a stranger. It’s a reminder that you can be successful, famous, and "perfect" and still feel like you don't have a seat at the table.
If you want to understand the modern intersection of capitalism and the female body, start here. Just don't expect a happy ending where everything is solved. That’s not how the real world works.
To dive deeper into the themes of image ownership, look into the Audrey Munson story Ratajkowski references—it’s a chilling historical parallel to the modern model’s experience. You might also want to read John Berger’s Ways of Seeing, which is the foundational text Emily uses to frame her entire argument about the male gaze.