You’re sitting in a high-stakes meeting. The air is thick with the smell of overpriced espresso and the hum of a ventilation system that’s seen better days. You’ve got the data. You’ve got the strategy. Then, you open your mouth and utter a phrase so tentative, so filled with verbal clutter, that the room’s energy just... evaporates.
It happens.
We’ve all been there, leaning on linguistic crutches because we’re nervous or trying to sound polite. But the reality is that "don't say that" isn't just a nagging piece of advice from a middle-school English teacher. It is a fundamental rule of power dynamics. In the business world of 2026, where attention spans are shorter than a TikTok transition, the words you choose act as a direct signal of your competence.
If you want people to actually listen, you have to stop sabotaging yourself with "softeners."
The Psychology of the Weak Opener
Most people use phrases like "I just wanted to check in" or "I feel like" because they want to avoid sounding aggressive. Psychologists call this "hedging." It's a defensive mechanism. By softening your stance, you’re creating a buffer against being wrong. If you say "I think the project might fail," and it succeeds, you can claim you were just being cautious. If it fails, you were right.
But here’s the rub: leadership requires skin in the game.
When you use "just" as a filler, you are literally shrinking yourself. "I’m just checking" implies you’re an intruder on someone’s time. You aren't. You're a colleague doing your job.
Consider the research by Dr. Elizabeth J. Marsh at Duke University regarding the "Illusion of Truth." Repeated statements are more likely to be perceived as true, but clarity and confidence in those statements are what allow them to take root in the first place. If your delivery is shaky, the facts won't save you.
Why "I'm Sorry" Is Often a Lie
Stop apologizing for existing.
Unless you actually missed a deadline, insulted someone’s grandmother, or crashed the company server, "I’m sorry" has no place in your daily professional vocabulary.
"Sorry to bother you."
"Sorry, I have a quick question."
"Sorry, can I just add something?"
When you lead with an apology, you’re signaling that your presence is a mistake. It’s a submissive move. Instead of saying "Sorry for the delay," try "Thank you for your patience." See the shift? You’ve moved the focus from your "failure" to their "virtue." It changes the entire chemistry of the interaction.
Don't Say That: The Phrases That Make You Sound Unreliable
We need to talk about the word "try."
Yoda was right, though he was a bit dramatic about it. In a project management context, "I’ll try to get that to you by Friday" is a red flag. To a stakeholder, "try" sounds like an early excuse for failure. It means you haven't managed your time well enough to give a firm yes or no.
Replace "try" with "I will." Or, if you can’t, "I will have a status update for you by Friday."
Then there’s the "To be honest" trap.
Think about it. If you start a sentence with "To be honest with you," what were you being before? Dishonest? It’s a filler phrase that inadvertently casts doubt on everything you said previously. People use it to signal sincerity, but it often does the exact opposite. It creates a micro-moment of distrust.
The "Does That Make Sense?" Problem
This one is a silent killer. You’ve just finished a brilliant 10-minute explanation of a complex pivot in company strategy. You look around and ask, "Does that make sense?"
You think you’re being helpful.
In reality, you’re either:
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- Questioning the intelligence of your audience.
- Questioning your own ability to explain things clearly.
If you genuinely want to check for understanding, ask: "What are your thoughts on that?" or "How do you see this impacting your department?" This invites a dialogue rather than asking for a confirmation of your own clarity. It puts the ball in their court without making anyone feel like they're back in the third grade.
The Linguistic Evolution of 2026
The way we communicate has shifted. With the rise of asynchronous work and the total integration of AI-assisted drafting, human-to-human communication has become more premium. When we do speak—whether on a video call or in person—we have to be high-signal.
"I think" is another one. Honestly, we know you think it; you're the one saying it. If you're presenting a data-driven conclusion, stating "The data shows X" is infinitely more powerful than "I think the data shows X."
Remove the ego-filter.
Stop Using "Just"
It’s a small word. Four letters. Total destruction.
"I’m just checking in."
"I just have a small idea."
"Could I just take a minute?"
Every time you use "just," you are asking for permission to be heard. In a competitive business environment, nobody gives you permission; you take the space. If you have an idea, it isn’t a "small" idea. It’s an idea. If you need a minute, you aren't "just" taking it; you are requesting time for a specific purpose.
Better Alternatives for Daily Use
If we’re going to strip away these verbal ticks, we need replacements that don’t make us sound like robots. The goal isn't to be a cold, calculating machine. The goal is to be a clear communicator.
Instead of "I feel like we should..." use "I recommend we..."
Instead of "Does that make sense?" use "What questions do you have?"
Instead of "I'm no expert, but..." use "From my perspective..."
Instead of "Actually..." (which is incredibly patronizing) just state the correction.
The word "actually" is a verbal slap. It’s almost always used to correct someone in a way that feels superior. If someone says something incorrect, you can provide the right information without the condescending preamble.
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The Power of the Pause
Sometimes, the best thing you can do to avoid saying the wrong thing is to say nothing at all.
Western business culture is terrified of silence. We fill it with "um," "uh," "like," and "you know." We use these sounds to hold the floor while our brains catch up. But silence is a tool. A three-second pause after someone asks a tough question doesn't make you look slow; it makes you look thoughtful. It gives your subsequent answer more weight.
Practical Steps to Clean Up Your Speech
Changing how you talk is harder than changing your diet. It's deeply ingrained. However, it’s entirely possible with a bit of tactical awareness.
First, record yourself.
Record a five-minute segment of a meeting or even just a voice memo of you explaining a concept. Listen back to it. It will be painful. You will hear every "just," every "sorta," and every "I think." This awareness is the first step toward elimination.
Second, pick one phrase to kill per week.
Don't try to overhaul your entire vocabulary overnight. This week, focus entirely on "just." Every time you’re about to type it in an email, backspace. Every time you’re about to say it, catch yourself.
Third, embrace the "Bottom Line Up Front" (BLUF) method.
This is a military communication technique. State the most important information first, then provide the context. When you start with the conclusion, you don't need the hedging phrases because you've already committed to a stance.
Actionable Takeaways for Your Next Meeting
- Email Audit: Before hitting send, search for the word "just" and "sorry." If they aren't absolutely necessary for a legitimate apology or specific meaning, delete them.
- The "Thank You" Pivot: Replace "Sorry I’m late" with "Thank you for waiting." This acknowledges the other person's time without devaluing your own.
- Declarative Statements: Practice turning "I think this could work" into "This strategy is the most viable path forward because..."
- Body Language Sync: Your words won't matter if your body is screaming "I'm nervous." Maintain eye contact and keep your hands visible.
The phrases we use are the scaffolding of our professional reputation. When you stop using language that diminishes your authority, you'll find that people stop treating your contributions as optional. It isn't about being mean or overly aggressive; it’s about being precise. Precision is the ultimate form of professional respect.
Stop asking for permission to be the expert you already are.