Cosima von Bülow Pavoncelli: What Really Happened to the Heiress Who Chose Her Father

Cosima von Bülow Pavoncelli: What Really Happened to the Heiress Who Chose Her Father

You’ve probably seen the movie Reversal of Fortune. Jeremy Irons plays the cold, aristocratic Claus von Bülow with a chilling precision that won him an Oscar. But while Hollywood focused on the legal theatrics of the 1980s, the real human heart of the story—and arguably its most tragic figure—was a teenager named Cosima von Bülow Pavoncelli.

Imagine being fifteen years old. Your mother, the stunningly wealthy and beautiful Sunny von Bülow, is in an irreversible coma. Your two older half-siblings are convinced your father tried to murder her with an insulin injection. The entire world is watching your family fall apart on live television. And you? You have to choose a side.

Cosima chose her father.

That single decision didn't just alienate her from her siblings; it nearly cost her an inheritance worth tens of millions of dollars. Today, Cosima von Bülow Pavoncelli lives a life that is worlds away from the tabloid frenzy of Newport, Rhode Island, yet the shadow of her parents' legacy remains.

The Choice That Split a Dynasty

Cosima was born in 1967, the only child of Claus and Sunny. By all accounts, she was the apple of her father’s eye. When the accusations began flying in 1980, the family didn't just break; it shattered along bloodlines. Her half-siblings, Annie-Laurie ("Ala") and Alexander von Auersperg, were the ones who pushed for the private investigation that led to Claus’s arrest.

They saw a predator. Cosima saw her dad.

She publicly stood by him during two of the most sensational trials in American history. Honestly, it's hard to wrap your head around the pressure she must have felt. Because she refused to denounce Claus, her grandmother, Annie Laurie Aitken, took a drastic step. She disinherited Cosima.

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Basically, the message was clear: if you support the man we believe killed my daughter, you get nothing.

For years, Cosima was effectively an outcast from the Crawford-Aitken fortune. She lived with the weight of being "the daughter who stayed," while her mother lay in a hospital bed in New York, a "persistent vegetative state" that lasted nearly thirty years.

Rebuilding in London: Life as a Pavoncelli

After Claus was eventually acquitted in 1985 and the civil suits were settled in 1987, the family reached a sort of grim truce. Claus agreed to leave the U.S., renounce his claims to Sunny’s $40 million estate, and divorce her. In exchange, Ala and Alexander agreed to let Cosima back into the grandmother’s will.

It was a business deal to save a family member's future.

Cosima moved to London to be with her father. She studied art history in Florence—sorta the classic move for European socialites—and eventually settled into the high-society circles of London. In 1996, she married Count Riccardo Pavoncelli, an Italian banker.

The wedding wasn't a Newport spectacle. It was a quiet affair at the Chelsea Register Office. She became Cosima von Bülow Pavoncelli, a name that carries both a title of nobility and a heavy history of scandal.

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The couple has three children:

  1. Nicolas Antonio Riccardo Pavoncelli (born 1998)
  2. Marina Gaetana Pavoncelli (born 2000)
  3. Antonia Carolina Pavoncelli (born 2005)

What's interesting is how normal their lives seem compared to the chaos of the 80s. They split time between a South Kensington townhouse and a farm in West Sussex. You’ll occasionally see her name on the International Best Dressed List, but she’s not chasing the cameras.

The Philanthropy of Sunny’s Daughter

A lot of people think socialites just go to parties, but Cosima has spent much of her adult life managing her mother’s philanthropic legacy. Specifically, she oversees the Sunny Crawford von Bülow Fund at the Morgan Library & Museum in New York.

It’s a bit poetic, really.

The fund buys drawings in Sunny’s name, keeping the memory of the "Sunnyside" heiress alive through art rather than court transcripts. She also supports cancer charities and education programs in the UK. She’s turned into a classic "London Power Hostess," but one with a very guarded private life.

When Claus died in 2019 at the age of 92, it was Riccardo Pavoncelli who confirmed the news to the New York Times. Even at the end, the Pavoncelli family was the gatekeeper of Claus’s final chapter.

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What Most People Get Wrong About the Case

People love a villain. It’s easy to look at the von Bülow case and see a gold-digging husband and a brainwashed daughter. But the reality is way more nuanced.

The second trial actually brought in medical experts who argued that Sunny’s coma wasn't caused by insulin at all. They pointed to a cocktail of prescription drugs, alcohol, and hypoglycemia. While the Auersperg children never believed that version, the jury did.

Cosima wasn't necessarily "siding with a murderer." In her mind, she was siding with a man who was being railroaded by a family that never liked him. Whether she was right or wrong is something only she can truly answer, but she's lived with that choice for over forty years.

How to View the Legacy Today

If you’re looking for a lesson in the life of Cosima von Bülow Pavoncelli, it’s about the resilience of the "second act." She managed to take a name that was synonymous with a "louse" (as the tabloids called her father) and turn it into a respected fixture of the London philanthropic scene.

Takeaway Insights:

  • The Power of Narrative: The movie Reversal of Fortune is a great watch, but it's a version of the truth, not the whole thing. To understand Cosima, you have to look past Jeremy Irons.
  • Estate Law Matters: The 1987 settlement is a case study in how "no-contest" clauses and family settlements can be used to repair (or at least patch up) a broken inheritance line.
  • Privacy is a Choice: Unlike many children of scandal today who go on reality TV or write "tell-all" books, Cosima has maintained a dignified silence. There is power in not talking.

If you want to understand the true impact of the von Bülow saga, stop looking at the crime scenes in Newport. Look at the quiet, art-filled life of a Countess in London who managed to outlive the scandal that defined her youth.

To dig deeper into this era of American high society, you might want to look into the writings of Dominick Dunne, who covered the trials with a focus on the class dynamics that made the von Bülows so fascinating to the public. You can also visit the Morgan Library’s digital archives to see the specific acquisitions made by the Sunny von Bülow fund, which offers a much more serene perspective on the family’s lasting impact.