Honestly, the "virgin Bachelor" label didn't age well. It’s been years since Colton Underwood sat across from Robin Roberts on Good Morning America and uttered the words that changed the reality TV landscape forever, but the ripples of that morning are still being felt. Coming out is rarely a clean, linear process. For Colton, it was messy. It was public. And for a lot of people, it was incredibly hard to swallow given the chaos that preceded it.
The Morning Everything Changed
On April 14, 2021, the world found out Colton Underwood is gay.
He looked different. Gone was the heavily polished, slightly anxious persona we saw jumping fences in Portugal. Instead, we got a man who admitted he’d known he was different since he was six years old. He told the world he had "prayed the gay away" for years. He even thanked God for making him the Bachelor, thinking it was a sign that he was meant to be straight.
It was a bombshell.
But it wasn't just a happy "coming out" story. There was a darker undercurrent. Underwood later admitted that he was partially forced into the spotlight because someone had taken a photo of him at a gay sauna in Los Angeles and tried to blackmail him. Imagine that pressure. You're one of the most famous faces in reality TV, and a stranger is threatening to tear your closet doors down before you're ready.
Addressing the Elephant in the Room: Cassie Randolph
We can't talk about Colton being gay without talking about the trauma he caused Cassie Randolph. This is the part where the "brave coming out" narrative hits a massive wall for many fans.
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Before the GMA interview, Colton’s life was spiraling. After he and Cassie broke up in May 2020, things turned toxic—fast.
- He allegedly put a tracking device on her car.
- He sent harassing text messages from anonymous numbers.
- He showed up at her parents' house at 2:00 a.m. to loiter in the alleyway.
Cassie eventually filed a restraining order. It was a terrifying situation that highlighted the dangerous ways deep-seated repression can manifest as control and stalking. While Colton apologized during his coming out, saying he "messed up" and was "sorry for any pain" he caused, many felt the Netflix docuseries that followed, Coming Out Colton, was a way to monetize his mistakes rather than truly atone for them.
Critics like Daniel D’Addario from Variety called the series "distasteful." It’s a valid point. Can someone be a victim of their own repression while also being a perpetrator of harassment? The answer is usually yes, but that doesn't make the pill any easier for the public to swallow.
Life as the "Brown-Underwoods"
If you haven't kept up with him since the Netflix show, things have moved remarkably fast. Colton met Jordan C. Brown, a political strategist, in the summer of 2021.
They didn't waste time.
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By early 2022, they were engaged. By May 2023, they were saying "I do" at a lavish three-day wedding at the Carneros Resort and Spa in Napa Valley. They even had something called a "loving walk," featuring photos of queer couples from the 18th and 19th centuries. It was a clear attempt to ground their modern celebrity marriage in a longer history of LGBTQ+ struggle and love.
The Reality of Gay Fatherhood
Fast forward to 2024, and the narrative shifted again. This time, it was about fatherhood.
Colton has been incredibly blunt about the struggles of starting a family as a gay man. He didn't just post a "we're expecting" photo; he went on podcasts like Daddyhood and talked about his "dead sperm."
He actually told Men’s Health that during his initial fertility tests, he only had four sperm—and three were dead. He had to go through "sperm rehab" (basically lifestyle changes and medical protocols) to improve his numbers. It’s the kind of raw, slightly TMI detail that makes him feel more human than the "Bachelor" brand ever allowed.
The result? On September 26, 2024, Colton and Jordan welcomed their son, Bishop.
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Why We Are Still Talking About This in 2026
Colton is currently competing on Season 4 of The Traitors, and his name still sparks heated debates in Reddit threads. Why? Because he represents a very specific, complicated type of celebrity. He’s a former NFL player, a Christian, and a man who spent years as the face of a heteronormative dating machine while knowing it was a lie.
Some see him as a symbol of hope—proof that you can escape a repressive upbringing and find a happy, "boring" suburban life with a husband and a baby. Others see him as a man who used his privilege to skip the line, pivot from a stalking scandal to a Netflix deal, and never truly faced the music for the fear he instilled in his ex-girlfriend.
What You Can Take Away From This
If you're following Colton's story or navigating your own journey, there are a few real-world insights to gather:
- Repression is a pressure cooker. Colton’s behavior toward Cassie is a textbook example of how internalizing your identity can lead to external explosions. It’s a reminder that mental health support is non-negotiable during a transition or coming-out process.
- The LGBTQ+ path to parenthood is a marathon. Between surrogacy costs (which can exceed $350,000) and fertility hurdles, it’s a grueling process. Colton’s transparency about "sperm rehab" has actually helped normalize male fertility issues, which are often ignored in favor of focusing on the woman.
- Accountability isn't a one-time event. Coming out doesn't erase past actions. Moving forward requires a continuous balance of living authentically while acknowledging the people who were hurt in the "closeted" crossfire.
The "Colton Underwood gay" search term isn't just about a celebrity's preference. It's about the intersection of reality TV ethics, the trauma of the closet, and the evolving face of the American family.
To stay informed on how high-profile figures navigate these transitions, you can follow the work of the Human Rights Campaign (HRC), where Colton has recently been active, or look into the Family Equality organization for resources on LGBTQ+ path-to-parenthood challenges. Understanding the legal and medical hurdles of surrogacy is a great next step if you’re looking to support or enter that space yourself.