It is a weird irony. You’d think the person best equipped to talk you down from a 30,000-foot panic attack would be a therapist who has never left the ground, someone with a soft voice and a clinical degree. But the most influential fear of flying author in the world spent years in the cockpit of a Pan Am 747.
Captain Tom Bunn isn't just a pilot. He's a licensed therapist. That specific crossover is why his SOAR program became the gold standard for people who feel like their heart is going to beat out of their chest the second the boarding door clicks shut.
Flying is unnatural. We weren't born with wings. When the plane bumps, your brain yells "danger," and for millions of people, that signal is impossible to mute.
The Science Behind the Fear of Flying Author’s Strategy
Most people think aviophobia is about a lack of information. They think if they just read enough statistics about how "the drive to the airport is the most dangerous part," they'll magically feel better. It doesn't work. Logic is a weak weapon against an amygdala that is currently convinced it's about to die.
Tom Bunn realized this early on. He focused on the vagus nerve.
Essentially, your body has a built-in "off switch" for stress, but you have to know how to trigger it. Bunn’s most famous contribution to the field is the "Strengthening Exercise." It’s basically a way to hijack the brain's association with the airplane. Instead of linking the noise of the engines to a crash, you link it to a moment of profound safety or human connection—specifically, the hormone oxytocin.
He suggests using a memory of someone you feel completely safe with. Not just "like," but someone where you feel a literal physical softening in their presence. By "linking" the various stages of flight (takeoff, turbulence, landing) to that specific feeling, you can actually prevent the stress hormones from flooding your system in the first place.
✨ Don't miss: Horizon Treadmill 7.0 AT: What Most People Get Wrong
It's clever. It’s also backed by neurobiology.
Why Allen Carr and Others Approach it Differently
You can't talk about a fear of flying author without mentioning Allen Carr. If Bunn is the neurobiology guy, Carr was the "de-programming" guy. Carr is famous for his Easyway series, mostly known for helping people quit smoking, but his book The Easy Way to Enjoy Flying applies the same logic: your fear is a result of a mental trap.
Carr argues that the fear isn't actually yours. It’s a societal projection fueled by media and "misplaced" concern. He spends a lot of time tearing down the "safety" myths that actually make people more nervous.
Then you have someone like Erica Jong. While not a clinical expert, her novel Fear of Flying actually put the phrase into the global zeitgeist in 1973, though she used it more as a metaphor for domestic entrapment and sexual liberation. Still, she tapped into that universal feeling of being "stuck" in mid-air.
The Problem With "Just Relax"
Most advice for nervous flyers is garbage.
"Take a deep breath."
"Have a glass of wine."
"Watch a movie."
🔗 Read more: How to Treat Uneven Skin Tone Without Wasting a Fortune on TikTok Trends
If you’re a true aviophobe, watching a rom-com while the plane is rattling over the Rockies feels like trying to read a book while being chased by a bear. It’s a physiological impossibility.
Bunn, and other legitimate experts like Dr. Martin Seif (a co-founder of the Anxiety and Depression Association of America), argue that "anticipatory anxiety" is actually the biggest hurdle. You suffer for three weeks before the flight, and by the time you sit in seat 14B, your nervous system is already fried.
Real experts focus on "non-selective" awareness. You don't try to ignore the noise. You acknowledge it. You categorize it. "That sound is the landing gear retracting." "That bump is an air pocket, which is as physically real as a pothole in the road."
What Actually Happens During Turbulence
People think the plane is falling. It isn't.
Air has mass. At 500 miles per hour, air acts like a fluid. A thick fluid. Imagine a block of wood encased in a block of Jell-O. If you shake the Jell-O, the wood moves, but it doesn't fall out. It can't. It’s suspended.
When a fear of flying author explains the physics of lift, it's not just to give you trivia. It's to help you realize that the plane wants to stay in the air. Wings are shaped to create a pressure differential. As long as there is forward motion, the plane is being pushed upward by the very air it's moving through.
💡 You might also like: My eye keeps twitching for days: When to ignore it and when to actually worry
Gravity is trying, but the Bernoulli principle is stronger.
Actionable Steps to Take Before Your Next Flight
If you’re serious about grounding your anxiety, don't just buy a book and put it on your shelf. You have to do the "work" before you get to the terminal.
- Establish a "Linking" Person: Find a memory where you felt 100% safe and loved. Practice recalling the physical sensation of that memory—the warmth in your chest, the relaxation of your shoulders.
- Study the Noises: Watch "White Noise" videos of airplane cabins on YouTube. Learn what the "two dings" mean (usually just the flight attendants communicating or the plane passing 10,000 feet).
- Avoid the "Safety" Behaviors: This is a big one from clinical psychologists. Don't grip the armrests. Don't stare at the flight attendants’ faces to see if they look scared. These behaviors tell your brain, "We are in a life-or-death situation," which keeps the adrenaline pumping.
- Meet the Pilot: If the crew isn't too busy, ask to say a quick hello to the captain during boarding. Seeing the person in charge as a calm, bored professional who just wants to get home to their kids can do wonders for your lizard brain.
The goal isn't necessarily to love flying. That might never happen. The goal is to reach a state of "benign boredom." You want to be the person who falls asleep before the plane even leaves the taxiway.
It takes time to re-train a brain that has been conditioned to fear the sky. But between the cognitive behavioral tools of people like Dr. Seif and the physiological hacks of Captain Tom Bunn, the path from panic to peace is actually pretty well-mapped. You just have to follow the flight plan.
Practical Next Steps for Anxious Travelers:
- Identify your specific trigger: Is it "claustrophobia" (not being able to get out) or "loss of control" (not being the pilot)? Knowing the difference changes which exercises you use.
- Download a Turbulence Forecast App: Apps like Turbli use real-time NOAA weather data to show you exactly where the bumps will be. Seeing a graph that shows "Light Turbulence" for 10 minutes followed by "Smooth Air" takes the surprise out of the sensation.
- Practice the 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique: If a panic spike happens, name 5 things you see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. This forces your brain back into the present moment and out of the "what-if" disaster loop.
The air is just a road you haven't learned to trust yet. Stick with the experts who understand both the mechanics of the engine and the mechanics of the mind.