Big Bang theme song lyrics: What the Barenaked Ladies actually sang

Big Bang theme song lyrics: What the Barenaked Ladies actually sang

Fourteen billion years ago. That’s where it starts. Honestly, if you grew up watching CBS or basically any syndicated channel in the last fifteen years, those first few bars of the Big Bang theme song lyrics are probably permanently seared into your brain. You know the ones. The rapid-fire history lesson that moves faster than a particle accelerator.

But here is the thing: most people just mumble through the middle and shout the word "Bang!" at the end.

It’s a bit of a masterpiece, really. Ed Robertson of the Barenaked Ladies didn't just scribble some rhymes about nerds. He actually sat down and tried to condense the entire history of the known universe into about thirty-two seconds. It’s dense. It’s frantic. And it is surprisingly scientifically accurate for a sitcom intro.

The story behind the "History of Everything"

It almost didn't happen.

Chuck Lorre and Bill Prady, the creators of the show, were looking for something that felt high-energy but smart. They had been to a Barenaked Ladies concert where Robertson did an improvised rap about cosmological history. It was inspired by a book he had just finished—Simon Singh’s Big Bang. Lorre and Prady called him up. They asked him to write the theme.

Robertson was hesitant at first. He had written songs for other projects that got rejected, and he didn't want to waste his time if they were also asking ten other bands. He told them, "If you're asking me, I'll do it. If you're asking me and the Counting Crows and Sting, I’m out."

They weren't. They wanted him.

The resulting track, officially titled "History of Everything," is a whirlwind. It starts with the singularity and ends with... well, us. Sitting on the couch watching Leonard and Sheldon argue about Thai food.

Breaking down the big bang theme song lyrics

Let's look at what is actually being said. The song starts with the universe in a "hot dense state." That’s a direct nod to the Friedmann-Lemaître-Robertson-Walker metric. It’s the standard cosmological model.

Then it moves fast.

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"Nearly fourteen billion years ago expansion started. Wait..."

The "Wait" is important. It’s a rhythmic pause that mimics the inflationary period of the early universe. It’s clever songwriting. Then we get the litany of milestones: Neptune, the tools, the pyramids, the Great Wall.

One of the most frequently misheard parts of the big bang theme song lyrics involves the line about the dinosaurs. People often think it's just random noise, but it's actually: "The dinosaurs met their fate / They tried to leap but they were late / And they all died out."

It’s a bit of a simplification of the Cretaceous–Paleogene extinction event, sure. We know now it was likely a massive asteroid hitting the Yucatán Peninsula rather than just being "late," but for a pop song, it works.

Why the lyrics feel so fast

The tempo is about 145 beats per minute. That is fast. But it’s not just the speed; it’s the syllabic density. Robertson is cramming complex historical concepts into tiny phonetic spaces.

Think about the line: "Autotrophs began to drool."

An autotroph is an organism that produces its own food (like a plant or algae). They don't actually "drool," obviously. They don't have mouths. But the imagery of early life becoming sentient and physical is a classic Barenaked Ladies move—taking something academic and making it silly.

Then you have the transition from the Pangea supercontinent to the rise of human civilization. "Australopithecus would really have been sick of us." It’s a mouthful. It’s also a jab at how far we’ve strayed from our evolutionary roots.

The full version you never hear on TV

The version you hear on TV is just the snippet. There is a full-length version of the song that goes much deeper into the timeline.

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In the extended cut, the big bang theme song lyrics dive into the future. It talks about the sun burning out and the eventual heat death of the universe. It’s surprisingly dark for a show that features a guy who says "Bazinga."

The full lyrics mention:

  • The oceans boiling.
  • The stars going dark.
  • The idea that we are all just "part of the show."

It places the entire human experience in this tiny, fragile window between the cooling of the Earth and the eventual collapse of everything. It’s a philosophical gut punch wrapped in a catchy acoustic guitar riff.

Scientific accuracy vs. poetic license

Is it 100% accurate? Kinda.

The song says "nearly fourteen billion years ago." The current estimated age of the universe is roughly 13.8 billion years. So, Robertson was pretty much spot on.

However, the timeline of the lyrics skips a few things. It jumps from the "expansion" straight to "Earth began to cool." In reality, there were billions of years of galaxy formation, star death, and supernova explosions that had to happen before our solar system even existed.

And the line "religion, astronomy, Encarta, Deuteronomy"? That’s just a rhyme. Encarta was a digital encyclopedia from Microsoft that was already becoming obsolete when the show premiered in 2007. It’s a time capsule within a song about time.

Believe it or not, there was actually a legal dispute involving this song. It wasn't about the science. It was about the money.

In 2015, Steven Page, who had left the Barenaked Ladies years prior, sued Ed Robertson. Page claimed he was entitled to 20% of the proceeds from the theme song. He argued that even though Robertson wrote it, the "band" brand was what secured the deal.

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The lawsuit was eventually settled, but it highlighted just how valuable these thirty seconds of music are. Theme songs for hit sitcoms are basically "mailbox money." Every time an episode airs in syndication—which is basically every minute of every day somewhere in the world—the royalties kick in.

Why it sticks in your head

The song works because it’s a "proclamation" song. It starts with a single voice and builds. By the time you get to "It all started with the big bang!", it feels like a communal anthem.

It’s also an "earworm" by design. The descending chord progression in the chorus is a classic pop trope that signals a resolution. Your brain wants to hear that final "Bang!" because it completes the musical loop.

Actionable insights for fans and creators

If you’re trying to memorize the big bang theme song lyrics for trivia or just to impress your friends, don't try to learn it all at once. The human brain struggles with rapid-fire lists.

  1. Break it into eras. Focus on the "Cosmic Era" (singularity to cooling), the "Prehistoric Era" (autotrophs to dinosaurs), and the "Human Era" (pyramids to Encarta).
  2. Listen to the acoustic live versions. Ed Robertson often plays this solo. Without the full band production, the words are much easier to distinguish.
  3. Watch the visuals. The title sequence of the show features 109 rapidly flashing images. They actually sync up with the lyrics. If you watch the images of the Great Wall while he says "Great Wall," the neural pathway for the lyric becomes much stronger.

For creators, the lesson of the Big Bang theme is about "the pitch." Robertson got the job because he took a complex, boring topic and made it rhythmic and funny during a live show. If you can explain the start of the universe in a way that makes people want to dance, you can sell anything.

The song remains one of the few TV intros that people rarely skip. It’s a reminder that even in a world of 15-second TikToks and "Skip Intro" buttons, a well-crafted story—even one that spans 14 billion years—can still hold our attention.

Next time you hear that drum fill, try to catch the line about the "gathering stars." It’s the most poetic part of the whole thing. We really are just organized stardust trying to figure out the lyrics to our own story.

To master the song yourself, start by practicing the "History of Everything" full version on Spotify or YouTube. It provides the necessary context for the frantic TV edit and makes the scientific references much clearer. Check out Simon Singh’s book if you want to see the original source material that sparked the whole idea.

Knowing the words is one thing; knowing why they were written is how you actually win the nerd debate at the next watch party.