"Bake him away, toys."
If you’ve spent any time on the internet in the last decade, you’ve seen the meme. Chief Wiggum, the lovable, incompetent police chief of Springfield, stands over a suspect and utters the ultimate spoonerism. It was originally a slip of the tongue—a play on "Take him away, boys"—but it morphed into a cultural shorthand for the chaotic energy of The Simpsons at its peak. For a long time, the phrase lived exclusively in low-resolution GIFs and Reddit comment threads. Then, the toy industry caught up.
The Weird Rise of Meme-Based Collectibles
Nostalgia is a hell of a drug. Honestly, the toy market today isn't really for kids anymore; it’s for thirty-somethings who want to reclaim a piece of their Saturday morning childhoods. When we talk about Bake Him Away toys, we aren't just talking about a plastic figurine. We’re talking about the intersection of "Golden Age" animation and the modern secondary market for collectibles.
Companies like Super7 and JAKKS Pacific have realized that the "deep cuts" sell better than the main characters. You can get a Homer Simpson doll anywhere. But a Chief Wiggum figure specifically branded or designed to commemorate the "Bake him away, toys" moment? That’s gold for a collector. It shows you're "in" on the joke. It proves you remember Season 5, Episode 2, "Cape Feare"—widely considered one of the best half-hours of television ever produced.
Why the "Cape Feare" Scene Stays Relevant
It’s about the timing. The episode aired in 1993. Think about that. We are decades removed from the original broadcast, yet the "Bake him away, toys" line is still used in political commentary, sports memes, and casual conversation. The joke works because it’s perfectly Wiggum. He's trying to be authoritative, trying to be the "cool cop" from a noir film, and he fails spectacularly.
When toy manufacturers look for new variants, they look for these specific, frozen-in-time beats. The Bake Him Away toys often feature Wiggum in his police uniform, perhaps with a slightly dazed expression or accompanied by accessories that nod to the bumbling nature of the Springfield PD. It’s not just a toy; it’s a physical manifestation of a "vibe."
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Finding the Authentic Bake Him Away Toys
You’ve gotta be careful when you’re hunting for these. Because the phrase is so popular, there’s a ton of "bootleg" or "fan-made" merchandise out there. If you’re looking for something official, you’re usually looking at the World of Springfield line from the early 2000s or the more recent, high-end collector figures.
The World of Springfield line was revolutionary because of its Intelli-Tronic voice activation. You’d put the Chief Wiggum figure on a compatible environment—like the Police Station—and he would actually say the lines. While the "Bake him away" line was a staple of his soundboard, finding a mint-condition Wiggum today can be a bit of a hunt. You’re looking at eBay, Mercari, or specialized collector sites like MyPlasticHeart or Entertainment Earth.
Prices vary. A lot.
Sometimes you can snag a loose figure for twenty bucks. If it’s "New In Box" (NIB), you might be looking at fifty to a hundred, depending on the rarity of the specific wave. Collectors go nuts for the packaging art. There’s something about that bright yellow branding that just hits different.
The Super7 Ultimates Factor
Super7 changed the game for Simpsons fans recently. Their "Ultimates" line is basically the Ferrari of action figures. They’re 7-inch scale, highly articulated, and come with a ridiculous amount of accessories. While they haven't released a "Bake Him Away" specific box set yet, the community has been clamoring for a Wiggum that includes interchangeable heads specifically for his various malapropisms.
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This is where the nuance of toy collecting comes in. Fans aren't just buying a toy; they are buying the ability to recreate scenes. A Bake Him Away toy setup usually involves a Lou and Eddie figure (the "toys/boys") standing in the background while Wiggum takes center stage.
Why People Are Obsessed With This Specific Meme
It’s the absurdity.
The world is pretty heavy right now, right? So, having a plastic cop on your desk that reminds you of a time when the biggest problem was a yellow man being chased by a guy with "Die Bart Die" tattooed on his chest... it's a nice escape. The "Bake him away, toys" moment represents a peak in comedic writing where the writers (including legendary names like Conan O'Brien and Jon Vitti) were firing on all cylinders.
People collect these because:
- Irony: It's a "failed" command that became a "winning" meme.
- Scarcity: Official Simpsons merch has gone through peaks and valleys in quality.
- Community: Owning a specific "meme" toy is a signal to other fans.
The Engineering of a Modern Collectible
Creating these figures isn't just about pouring plastic into a mold. There's a whole process of digital sculpting. Sculptors have to capture the specific "overbite" that Matt Groening’s characters have. If the eyes are slightly off-center, the whole thing looks like a cheap knockoff. For the Bake Him Away toys, the "expression" is key. Wiggum needs to look confident yet completely oblivious.
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Materials matter, too. Modern collectors hate "sticky" plastic. They want matte finishes. They want joints that don't snap the first time you pose them. This is why the price points have crept up from five-dollar drugstore toys to fifty-dollar boutique items.
The Secondary Market and Scalping
Let’s be real: buying these things can be a pain. "Scalpers" use bots to buy up entire stocks of limited edition Simpsons releases the second they hit the web. This has pushed many fans toward the "custom" toy scene. You’ll see artists on Instagram or Etsy taking base Wiggum figures and repainting them or 3D-printing custom accessories—like a tray of donuts or a "Bake Him Away" speech bubble—to make their own unique versions.
Honestly, some of the custom Bake Him Away toys are better than the mass-produced ones. They have more heart. They’re made by people who actually watch the show, not just by a corporation with a license.
How to Start Your Own Collection
If you're just getting into this, don't try to buy everything at once. You'll go broke. The Simpsons has one of the largest toy libraries in history. Start with the "anchors."
- Find a solid Chief Wiggum. Look for the Playmates "World of Springfield" version if you want the classic feel, or wait for the inevitable Super7 reissue if you want something that looks like it stepped off the screen.
- Verify the "Talking" Feature. If you buy an older figure, the batteries have probably leaked. This is a huge issue in the hobby. Always ask the seller if the battery compartment is clean. If it’s corroded, the figure loses a lot of its value.
- Join the Groups. Facebook groups like "Simpsons Merch & Collectibles" are actually great. People there are usually honest about what things are worth. They’ll tell you if you’re overpaying for a Bake Him Away toy or if you’ve found a "holy grail."
Common Misconceptions About Simpsons Merch
A lot of people think that because The Simpsons is still on the air, the toys are common. Wrong. The licensing has shifted hands so many times that many of the best figures are "out of print" and will likely never be made the same way again. The "Bake him away, toys" era is specifically tied to the Fox years, and while Disney now owns the brand, their approach to merchandising is different. They tend to focus more on the "evergreen" look rather than the weird, niche jokes from 1993.
What to Look for in the Future
Keep an eye on the "Kidrobot" collaborations. They often do "blind box" series that include rare variants. There have been rumors of a "Meme Series" for years, and a Bake Him Away toy would be the crown jewel of that set. Also, watch the auction houses. As the people who grew up with the show reach their 40s and 50s, the value of these specific "joke" toys is only going to climb.
It’s weird to think that a slip of the tongue by a voice actor (the legendary Hank Azaria) could create an entire micro-economy of plastic figures. But that’s the power of The Simpsons. It’s a language we all speak.
Actionable Insights for Collectors
- Check the SKU: If you're looking for official Playmates figures, verify the SKU numbers on fan wikis to ensure you aren't buying a "re-carded" figure (an old toy put into a new, fake box).
- Storage is Key: If you buy these as an investment, keep them out of direct sunlight. The "Springfield Yellow" plastic is notoriously prone to fading and turning a weird, sickly green color over time.
- Join the Community: Before buying on eBay, check the "Simpsons Collector" forums. Often, members will sell to each other at "brotherhood prices" rather than the inflated market rates found on public auction sites.
- Focus on the Era: The most valuable "Bake Him Away" era toys are those produced between 1999 and 2004. Anything later than that tends to have lower build quality and less attention to the specific "Cape Feare" aesthetic.
- Verify Audio: For figures with voice chips, always ask for a video of the figure working. Replacing a voice chip is nearly impossible without destroying the plastic casing.