If you’ve spent more than five minutes on Stan Twitter lately, you’ve probably seen the side-by-side photos. It’s the meme that won’t die. On one side, you have Frankie Grande, Ariana’s high-energy, theater-loving older brother. On the other, you have Ethan Slater, the Broadway star who’s been Ariana’s partner since the Wicked set became their playground in 2023.
The internet has a lot of thoughts. Mostly about how they look exactly alike.
Honestly, the Ariana Grande brother vs boyfriend comparisons are everywhere, and they’ve reached a fever pitch now that Wicked: For Good has hit theaters in late 2025 and we’re moving into 2026. Is it just a coincidence? Is it a "theater kid" aesthetic? Or is there actually some weird science behind why we sometimes pick partners who look like our siblings? Let's get into the weeds of this weirdly fascinating family dynamic.
The Ethan Slater and Frankie Grande Doppelgänger Theory
Let’s be real: the physical similarities are kinda jarring. Both Ethan and Frankie share that specific, bright-eyed Broadway energy. They’ve both got the expressive, "performer" face, the lean build, and—at various points in their careers—strikingly similar hair. When Ethan first stepped out with red hair for his role as Boq, the "ginger Frankie" comments were relentless.
It’s not just about the face, though. It’s the vibe.
Frankie Grande is 10 years older than Ariana, but they’ve always been incredibly tight. He’s a musical theater veteran (Mamma Mia!, Rock of Ages), a dancer, and a massive personality. Ethan Slater is a Tony-nominated actor who literally rose to fame playing SpongeBob SquarePants on Broadway. They aren’t just similar-looking; they inhabit the exact same professional world.
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Some fans call it "Freudian." Others think it’s just a case of Ariana having a very specific "type"—the talented, hardworking theater boy who can keep up with her vocal runs and her love for show tunes.
Why Do They Look So Much Alike?
You’ve probably heard of the Instagram account "Siblings or Dating?" It exists for a reason. Humans are weirdly attracted to familiarity. There’s actually a term for this in psychology called assortative mating. Basically, we are subconsciously drawn to people who remind us of ourselves or our close family members because they feel "safe" or "known."
- Facial Features: Studies in journals like Evolution and Human Behavior have shown that people often choose partners whose facial structures mimic those of their opposite-sex parent or even their siblings.
- The "Theater Kid" Factor: Let's face it—there’s a look. The high-energy, expressive, slightly polished appearance of a Broadway performer is a distinct niche.
- The Brother's Approval: Frankie hasn't just ignored the comparisons; he’s leaned into the friendship. He’s gone on record calling Ethan a "wonderful guy" and a "sweetheart."
When your big brother—who is basically your best friend—is a high-energy performer, it’s not a huge stretch to imagine you’d fall for someone with that same passion and drive.
The Timeline: How the Boyfriend Entered the Picture
To understand the Ariana Grande brother vs boyfriend discourse, you have to look at how Ethan Slater became a permanent fixture in the Grande family circle. It wasn't exactly a quiet entrance.
Ariana and Ethan met on the set of Wicked in London back in late 2022. At the time, Ariana was still married to real estate agent Dalton Gomez, and Ethan was with his high school sweetheart, Lilly Jay. By July 2023, everything exploded. Headlines confirmed Ariana and Dalton were over, and Ethan had filed for divorce.
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The drama was heavy. People were taking sides. But through all the "homewrecker" accusations and the TikTok deep-dives, one person was consistently in Ariana’s corner: Frankie.
Frankie’s Role in the Relationship
Frankie didn't just stay quiet. He became the ultimate hype man.
- Disneyland Outings: In late 2023, one of the first times we saw Ariana and Ethan out "in the wild" was at Disneyland. Who was right there with them? Frankie.
- Red Carpet Bonding: At the Palm Springs International Film Festival in early 2025, Ethan and Frankie were spotted laughing and posing for photos together.
- The "Stamp of Approval": Frankie told reporters that he’s been a fan of Ethan since his SpongeBob days. For Ariana, having her brother and boyfriend get along isn't just a bonus—it's a requirement.
Comparing the Dynamics: Brotherly Bond vs. Romantic Love
It’s easy to joke about the looks, but the roles these two men play in Ariana’s life couldn’t be more different.
Frankie is her rock. He’s the one who was there through the Manchester tragedy, through her sobriety journey (and his own), and through the whirlwind of her becoming the biggest pop star on earth. He’s the person she can "scream musicals" with at 2 AM in their pajamas.
Ethan, on the other hand, seems to be her creative equal. Insiders have spent the last two years talking about how they "nerd out" over music and acting. While her previous relationship with Dalton Gomez was kept very private and away from the "industry," her life with Ethan is fully immersed in it. They are coworkers, collaborators, and partners.
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What Most People Get Wrong
The biggest misconception is that the "brother vs boyfriend" thing is some kind of weird obsession for Ariana. In reality, it’s likely just a byproduct of her environment. If you spend your entire life in rehearsals, on stages, and in recording studios, you’re going to be surrounded by people who look and act like Frankie.
Also, can we talk about the hair? A lot of the "they’re twins" talk started because they both had bleached or dyed hair at the same time. If you look at photos of Ethan from 2018 and Frankie from 2026, the resemblance is much less "identical twin" and more "vaguely related cousins."
The State of "Arithan" in 2026
As we move through 2026, the couple is stronger than ever. Ariana is gearing up for her Eternal Sunshine tour, and Ethan is juggling his own Off-Broadway projects. They’ve successfully navigated one of the messiest PR storms in recent celebrity history and come out the other side as a "real deal" couple.
The "brother vs boyfriend" memes will probably never fully go away. That’s just the internet. But for Ariana, it seems like having a partner who fits into her family—and looks like he belongs in a Grande family Christmas photo—is exactly what she wanted.
How to Navigate the Grande Fandom Today
If you’re trying to keep up with the ever-evolving world of Ariana, Ethan, and Frankie, here are a few things to keep in mind:
- Check the Source: Much of the drama surrounding the 2023 "overlap" was based on anonymous sources. If you're looking for the truth, stick to the confirmed timelines of their divorces (Dalton and Ariana finalized theirs in 2024; Ethan and Lilly Jay also finalized in late 2024).
- Watch the Interviews: If you want to see the "brother vs boyfriend" dynamic in action, watch the Wicked press tour clips. You’ll see Frankie in the background of almost every major premiere, usually chatting with Ethan.
- Ignore the "Freud" Jokes: People love a reach. Physical resemblance between partners and siblings is a documented psychological phenomenon that happens to regular people every day—it’s just more obvious when it’s happening to a superstar.
Next Steps for Fans:
To get the full picture of their shared history, you should look into the history of the Wicked production. Seeing how the cast bonded during the 2023 SAG-AFTRA strike gives a lot of context to why Ariana and Ethan became so close so quickly. You can also check out Frankie’s 2025 album, Hotel Rock Bottom, for a deeper look into the Grande family's personal journey over the last few years.