You’re sitting there. It’s a rainy Tuesday at a suburban intersection, your windshield wipers are thumping, and you’re staring at a rusted Subaru across from you. You both arrived at the same time. Or did you? That split-second hesitation is where the chaos starts. Understanding 4 way stop who goes first isn't just about passing a permit test you took sixteen years ago; it’s about preventing that awkward "no, you go" hand-wave dance that eventually leads to a fender bender.
Most people drive on autopilot. We see a red octagon, we tap the brakes, we look around. But when four cars hit those white lines simultaneously, the collective brain power of the group seems to tank. It shouldn't be that hard. Honestly, the law is pretty black and white, though local "customs" tend to muddy the waters more than they should.
The Golden Rule of Arrival
The fundamental pillar of the four-way stop is simple: First to arrive, first to thrive. If you clearly reach the limit line or the stop sign before anyone else, you own that intersection. You have the right of way. It doesn’t matter if you’re turning left, right, or going straight. If your tires stopped moving while the other guy was still coasting toward the line, you go.
But what happens when it’s a tie? This is where the "Right-Hand Rule" kicks in. If two vehicles arrive at the same time and are at a 90-degree angle to each other, the driver on the right has the right of way. It’s a universal standard across the United States, backed by state-specific vehicle codes like California’s CVC 21802 or New York’s VAT 1142.
Think of it like a clock. If you’re at 6 o’clock and another car is at 3 o’clock, they are to your right. They go. You wait. If you’re at 6 and someone is at 9 o’clock, you are to their right. You go. It’s a hand-off system that keeps traffic flowing, provided everyone actually knows their left from their right under pressure.
When You're Facing Each Other
Ties aren't always side-by-side. Sometimes you’re facing another car directly. If you both arrive at the same time and you’re both going straight, you can both go. No conflict.
The nightmare scenario is the left turn. If you’re turning left and the person across from you is going straight, the straight-travelling vehicle goes first. Left turns are considered "crossing traffic," which means you have the lowest priority in a tie-breaker. You have to wait for the path to clear. If you're both turning left? You can usually both go simultaneously since your paths won't (or shouldn't) cross, but you'd better hope neither of you has a wide turning radius.
Why "Being Nice" Is Actually Dangerous
We’ve all seen the "Polite Paul." He gets to the sign first, has the clear right of way, but sits there waving people through like he’s directing a symphony.
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Don't be Paul.
Being "nice" at a 4 way stop is one of the most dangerous things you can do. Why? Because you’re breaking the predictable flow of traffic. When you have the right of way and you don't take it, you create confusion. The driver to your left might start to go, then stop because they realize you should have gone, then you both start moving at the same time, and—crunch.
Predictability is better than politeness. If it’s your turn, take it. This isn't about being aggressive; it's about following the script everyone else is (hopefully) following. According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA), intersection-related crashes make up about 40% of all accidents in the U.S. A huge chunk of those are caused by miscommunication or "false assumptions" about what another driver is going to do.
Special Cases and the "Bully" Factor
The real world isn't a DMV manual. You have pedestrians. You have cyclists. You have the guy in the lifted truck who thinks stop signs are merely suggestions.
Pedestrians always win
In most jurisdictions, pedestrians have the right of way the moment they step into the crosswalk (and often even if they're just standing on the curb looking like they might). If you’re at a 4 way stop and someone is walking, your right-of-way "turn" is paused. You wait until they clear your path. If you're turning, you wait until they clear the entire half of the roadway you're turning into.
The Cyclist Dilemma
Cyclists are technically vehicles. They have to stop. They have to follow the same "first to arrive" rules. However, many drivers treat them like pedestrians, and many cyclists treat themselves like ghosts. If a cyclist arrives first, give them the space. If you arrive first, go—but keep a sharp eye out for them "filtering" or blowing through the sign.
The Three-Car Logjam
Occasionally, three cars arrive at once. Car A is at the bottom, Car B is to their right, and Car C is to Car B's right. In this scenario, Car C goes first. Then Car B. Then Car A. It’s a sequential rotation. If four cars arrive at once? Technically, the law doesn't have a perfect "first" answer, but usually, one person nudges forward, becomes the "first," and the right-hand rule takes over from there.
Defensive Strategies for the Confused Intersection
Since you can't control the other three people at the stop, you have to drive defensively. Experts from organizations like AAA and the National Safety Council emphasize "eye contact."
If you aren't sure who’s going, look at the other driver. Are they looking at you? Are they looking at their phone? (They probably are). If they wave you on, even if it’s technically their turn, just go. Once the "script" is broken, your goal is to clear the intersection as safely as possible.
- Watch the wheels: Sometimes a car looks like it’s stopping, but the wheels are still creeping. Don't commit to your turn until you see their chassis "pitch" forward slightly, indicating a full stop.
- The "Nudge" Technique: If it’s a dead tie and everyone is staring at each other, a slow, deliberate crawl forward signals your intent.
- Turn Signals Matter: If you’re turning left but don't use your signal, the person across from you assumes you're going straight. When you suddenly veer into their path, that’s on you.
The legality of 4 way stop who goes first often comes down to who had the "last clear chance" to avoid a collision. Even if you had the right of way, if you saw a car wasn't stopping and you hit them anyway, a court might find you partially liable.
Actionable Steps for Your Next Drive
To keep yourself and everyone else safe, follow these specific protocols next time you hit a 4 way stop:
- Stop completely behind the line. Many people "roll" the sign. If you don't come to a full stop, you haven't technically "arrived" yet in the eyes of the law, which can forfeit your right of way in a tie.
- Count to one. Once stopped, take one second to scan the other three corners. This prevents "jackrabbit" starts that lead to collisions with people running the sign from the other direction.
- Identify your "Right-Hand" partner. As you approach, look to your right. If there's a car there and they stop at the same time as you, they go. Period.
- Claim your turn. If it is your turn, move decisively. Do not hesitate or wave others through unless there is a safety hazard.
- Watch for the "Double-Follower." Sometimes, after the person in front of you goes, the car behind them tries to "sneak" through with them. Always wait for the intersection to clear before you start your movement.
Following these rules isn't just about avoiding a ticket. It’s about reducing the mental load on everyone else on the road. When we all follow the same "operating system," traffic moves faster, stress levels drop, and everyone gets home without a crumpled bumper.